


It's a long, long way back home

by AmeliaAndreas3



Series: An Endless chain. [15]
Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Author's Favorite, Canon-Typical Violence, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, POV Alternating, POV First Person, The rebellion never happened, first chapter suck but the rest are getting good I promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:34:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 32
Words: 50,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23097181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmeliaAndreas3/pseuds/AmeliaAndreas3
Summary: The 110th hunger games set the record for the longest running games to date: 31 days of fighting for survival in a huge golden pyramid.Jean Trojillio is a legacy, Jean Trojillio knows what happens to legacies, but it doesn't mean she won't try to make it out alive.(Formally titled "Odyssey")
Relationships: Original Male Character/Original Male Character
Series: An Endless chain. [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1468564
Comments: 10
Kudos: 17





	1. Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm lowkey excited to write this one. I don't know how many will be interested but I still hope you guys enjoy! 
> 
> Also TW: language, Jean swears and so are her allies. James (the victor father) mentions being sold off like Finnick. So just saying. And in later chapters, one of the characters mentions/ implies about eating disorders so if that triggers you, she mentions it in chapters 11 and 14. Read carefully or don't read at all, your choice. Stay safe!

**Day 1- intial bloodbath**

"Ladies and gentlemen, let the One-hundred and tenth hunger games commence!" Says Cornwall Cerrone.

I blink hard to catch my surroundings in the 60 ticking seconds I have left. 

There is no sunlight; only artificial torches on the walls in fixed spaces - _weird_ \- I can see the tip high above through a glass window the size of the semicircle.

_A pyramid, like the one I used to see on pictures in school._

Dad explained me about all kinds of possible arenas I could face. He mentioned pyramids, but they were rare. 

30 seconds. 

There's Ophelia from 1 to my left, she's staring ahead; eyes focused only on the weapons inside the cornucopia's mouth. 

Hopefully I can make an escape with at least one of the packs. There are a few close to where I'm standing. 

10 seconds. 

I lock onto a pack a little to my right, Ophelia won't be able to reach me on time with a weapon if I'll just grab it and bolt; right?

7, 6, 5 

I move my hands through my hair slowly. 

4, 3, 2

I think about my dad in the mentors room.

One.

The gong is loud. Holy shit, was it always this loud?

I lock onto the bag and slide it over my back when I feel something pulling me back. It's a boy from 5: he's pulling me by my hair and I send my elbow towards his face. I turn back when his grip loosen and he drops at my feet. 

Ophelia's knife sticks out from his back. 

I bolt away when I hear a shrink of a second knife aimed towards me, I press the bag to my face and protect them.

To my left; there's a spear sticking out from a girl's chest and I stumble, the bile is raising in my throat.. _Don't look. Don't look. Don't look!._

The lowest half of the pyramid is bigger than what I thought I would be: I keep running, there are more shadow near the edges and I disappear completely. _Wonderful_. 

There's a ladder at the wall and I climb it hesitantly. I can hear distant running and I shrink closer to the wall. I snatch the torch above where I sit and hold it in front of me. My bag has a filled water bottle, 12 strips of dried meat, two packs of crackers and a sleeping bag. 

Not much. Shit. 

I blow the torch out, it doesn't help me now. 

Quiet, not a damn word. 

I lay down to wait out the day.. canons start firing about an hour later? 

The anthem plays and I watch 8 faces flash in front of me. The fives, the sevens; Nine girl, Ten girl, the Twelves. 

Rainier is still alive. I need to find him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I know this isn't the best first episode but I'm reallyyy getting better with the latest chapters hope you can give it a chance


	2. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean reminisces about ber first reaping day.

_"Jeanie, are you scared?"_

_There's a weird tone in Dad's voice, the one he uses everytime he talks about the reaping._

_"It's only one slip, dad. We started learning about calculating odds in school, they are as slim as the chances of head peacekeeper Teerence removing his helmet and letting go of the club he always carries"_

_Dad sighs and plays with his omelette.. "you know you're not any normal girl, right Jeanie?"_

_"Do you believe in bad luck, dad?" I put the fork down, forcing him to look up. "I believe in luck, luck is what got me through the games, I believe some things can affect it"_

_He leaves the kitchen and I follow him with my gaze.. he comes back holding a box. "What is it?" I question. "A gift. To keep your luck on the good side." He opens it and the wood shrieks for a second. Inside there's A ring is tied to a string; it's a simple ring, the metal is black near the edges, but I can see the engraving on it: little vine leaves._

_"It's beautiful. Was it the ring that-"_

_"That was my token in the arena? The ring I gave your mother when I asked her to spend the rest of her life with me? Yes to both."_

_I pick it up and twist it between my fingers, the ring is cold to the touch, probably because dad didn't touch it since mom died two years ago._

_Dad pulls me close. "I want you to wear it today, alright? I'm sure it'll keep you safe at least for today"_

_I slowly pull it over my head, the ring hangs close to my heart and I smile. "Do you think the ring will keep me safe in the years to come?"_

_Dad pats my shoulder. "Let's worry about today for now okay? Go get dressed"_

_The stage looks really scary when you're standing so close. I can sort of see the sweat glistening on Giorno's artificial green skin, his hand reaching for the girls bowl...._

_"Nini Marks" he announces. I sigh with relief along with the girls near me when a 16 year old steps forward._

_My father nods to me from above and I clutch the ring, whispering a thank you to mom in the sky, watching over me._

_I begin the long walk to Hailey's house, where I stayed all my life during that first month of summer. Where I'll keep on staying if luck will keep on smiling for me._

* * *

**Day two**

Before I fell asleep I wondered how would we know when it's day. Apparently that wouldn't be a problem: the giant holographic _2_ is enough to know. 

I need to move and stretch my body. Me sitting here is probably costing me sponsers. Even if dad said staying put is the best option, at least until I absolutely have to kill and go on the offence. 

But I can't be still. 

"Are you sure there are tributes here? We've been searching for the past two hours. I get that this level is smaller, but it's still big enough for them to hide in the dark" I can hear Ophelia not so far away. 

Okay, back to my wall, no sound. I clutch the ring around my neck. I'll need all the luck I can get. 

"They have to be, we searched the perimeter on the cornucopia's level and found no one. Some gotta be here at least" I don't recognize the voice answering her; but it's obvious he's a career. 

They walk in slience for a few minutes or so. "Be careful, who knows what's lurking in here" If I could see Ophelia now, she is probably frowning. "Don't worry, it's day 2. No mutts yet." The boy with her answers. 

"I'm just saying. Watch your step" Ophelia argues. 

"What else can they do to-" his sentence abruptly ends when a burst of light illuminates on him and Ophelia: with the new light source I can see the fluid splashed onto his face. He screams in agony. 

"Nyx! Are you okay?!" Ophelia drops to her knees next to him, the burst of light dissapears. I can only see their shadows again from my place. 

Nyx coughs up and I can hear his heavy breaths clearly. "Its- its so dark.. I can't- I can't see, Ophelia! Something is wrong with me" 

I can see a little spark from their general direction. A flashlight, perhaps?

"How about now; can you see me now?" 

"No, no! It's still dark. I think.. I think the thing that splashed on me did something-" 

I can only imagine Ophelia trying to colect herself before she says: "let's just go back to the cornucopia and try get you something that can help. Clarisse, Jordan, Tate and Valerie can handle hunting just fine without us." 

I hear their footsteps getting further back.

So the arena is trapped, okay, I can handle it. All I need is a source of light to look for the signs. I carefully drag myself to the next torch- nothing happened, that's a good sign- I move the torch as close to the floor as I can.

It's still the sand colored floor I've seen yesterday, but looking closely, isn't the tile here looks a bit redder than the others? It is. And the one after it also looks like it! 

Carefully, I Move the torch close so I can see where I'm stepping, at least I can recognize where the traps are.

I stare at the soundless crackling fire: how long can it burn? 

I go back to sitting under my extinguished torch. I'm still a legacy, that's gotta count, maybe buy me some time before the gamemakers will force me into a run in or kill me with mutts. 

Hopefully I can stay safe for now 


	3. Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not all of Jean's reaping days went smoothly. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean looks for water.

_I stare out the big window. "Dad. What if they call my name? You know.. 14 is the age they took Cassandra Sanchez"_

_Dad pulls me in his arms, we have the same sparkling chocolate brown eyes. "Whatever happens today. I would do whatever I can to protect you."_

_I watched games of legacies; the ones where the legacy won are so few I can count them on one hand: Gloss and Cashmere Richson, Camilla Sullivan, Prim Everdeen (and that's the year a legacy died too) all won because they killed; all won 30 years ago at least._

_The odds are against me._

_Dad sends me upstairs to get dressed when Kala Jaoule enters. I like her, she's the only company we have in the village now that Chaff died three years ago. I never get to hear what they discuss: I get that it has to do with the games, but goddamit: I'm 14. I'm not a child anymore._

_I wear the dress Kala bought me for my birthday. The white and green stripes look nice on me._

_I don't look at the other girls who wear hand-me-downs. I've learned early on how the other families live. How horrible their life is._

_Giorno welcomes us with the usual speech and I zone out like I usually do._

_While the old video played I keep my eyes on dad up there with Kala._

_Giorno's green hand reaches for the girls bowl. He pauses for dramatic effect before calling out._

_"Jean Trojillio!"_

_I let out a terrified gasp, no- I'm not ready! I don't wanna go yet- I look up to my dad and see the same horrified expression reflected on his face._

_I take a shaky step towards the aisle._

_"I Volunteer! I Volunteer as tribute!" Someone from behind me calls out. I recognize that voice immediately._

_Hailey. She steps away and squeezes my hand before walking onstage. Her mother is crying behind the line._

_Giorno shakes off the surprise and welcomes her with short applause._

_"Your name. Darling? You are a brave soul"_

_"Hailey Summit"_

_I close my eyes to block out the rest of the reaping. As soon as peacekeepers asher us away back home, I clear out and run to the goodbye room._

* * *

**Day 3**

The first thing I see when I wake up is the giant 3. I carefully glide towards it. Around the middle, above the cornucopia, there's the glass ceiling/floor that allowed me to see the tip, but no longer now with the holographic covering it. 

My water bottle is half empty, the water are warm and stingy, but water nevertheless. 

I need to find ways to fill it. Ones that don't include begging for sponsers. 

Using the torch to look for the marked tiles, I move around, the torches are close to the walls but supply barely any light. 

_Think clearly._ There won't be any water on this floor, _you'll have to go to the cornucopia's floor._

"Fuck. Tell me what to do!" I maybe risiking exposure but I need my dad's advice. 

I continue to walk and circle the glass ceiling. Carefully skipping over the traps. How will the parachute even find me? What, can it materialize out of thin air? 

I spend the rest of the day waiting for an answer. 

At night I hear a soft hum and the parachute falls down. A half-liter bottle is there along with a note: 

_Wait until you absolutely have to move. I'll buy you some time- dad_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Living tributes:
> 
> Ophelia, Nyx (1)  
> Clarisse, Jordan (2)  
> Ios, Bate (3)  
> Valerie, Tate (4)  
> Winona, Ethan (6)  
> Leslie, Cory (8)  
> Angus (9)  
> Damen (10)  
> Jean, Rainier (11)


	4. Day 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean remembers the goodbye to Hailey.

_As soon as her parents exit the room, I burst in._

_"Thank you. Thank you so much! But- but why would you do this for me?"_

_Hailey sits on one of the chairs, her eyes are a little red but she smiles anyway. "I did it because it's not your time yet. You're too young and I know James could never handle being your mentor"_

_"My dad can manage. He knows that it's gonna happen someday."_

_"But did you see his face? Did you see how horrified he looked?" Hailey questions._

_"I saw his face. But he can suck it up! Now you are going into the games and I'll never forgive myself if something happens to you out there"_

_"I made my choice Jean. My family all except it"_

_"I don't! I can't imagine even walking near your house to watch the games again."_

_"There's nothing else you can do Jean. You're my best friend and I love you"_

_I throw myself into her hug. "I love you too.. you saved my life. I'll never forget it"_

_Hailey smiles. "I know you won't. Because neither will I. I have a plan to win and when I'm back you can pay me up in the victors village"_

_I need to give her a token, my hands close on the ring._

_"Take it" I take it off and hand it to her._

_"That's your Dad's ring" Hailey gasps._

_"I know. I want you to take it. He said it's lucky, and it got him through the arena. I'm giving it to you so you can use it to win too."_

_Hailey takes the ring and slides the string over her neck. "Thank you, Jean"_

_"Come back. Okay? May the odds be ever in your favor. Hailey"_

_"They will" she gives me one last hug and head peacekeeper Teerence enters to lead me back to the village, who will stand empty for the next month before- hopefully- dad, Kala and Hailey will come back._

* * *

I spend the 4th day in my little corner, memories about Hailey flood my mind and I let them sink in. I clutch the ring again. 

_This time it'll work for me._ I think as the seal shows up again at night, baring no one's picture. 


	5. Day 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hailey reveals something surprising in her interview.
> 
> In the arena, the games reach a turning point.

_Our house in the village looks even bigger when it's empty._

_I had no choice but to go back here, like I told Hailey, I couldn't stay with her family, that wouldn't be fair._

_For the past week I went to school as usual, it helped me forget about what happened for a couple of hours at least, and I was grateful._

_Other kids avoided me during school hours, but I'm not surprised, it's what they always do. The gap between my life and theirs was so big no bridge can conmect us. And now, when my name got called, non of them want to catch my "bad luck"_

_It's weird not having my ring with me. But I'm more than glad Hailey carries it. I know dad will do his best to bring her home._

_The interview is tonight, I don't bother listening to Yelene go on about some trends and stats, Hailey did something to score a 6. Which is average and nice according to dad._

_I lower the volume during the careers interviews. They are usually the same, and all five of them- excluding the boy from Four- Look menacing and too pretty to be true._

_The middle districts are nothing special, one boy from Seven said he wants to open a restaurant with his victory money. He comments about Capitol food and makes the crowd laugh._

_Finally, Hailey goes on stage, dressed in an emerald green dress with white flower patels scattered around. My necklace is shining on her neck clearly, she clutchs it._

_"Hailey we all saw what you did for Jean Trojillio. Care to elaborate on why?" Yelene's hair is royal purple this year and to be honest- it's her best look._

_Hailey thinks for a momemt. "Jean and I know eachother for a long time. She used to come over every year when James came here to mentor. Especially in the last five years, when she had nowhere else." I lean forward, yes, it's no secret my mother died, Capitol crew members came to condolence my dad and participate in the funeral._

_"I waited every day for Jean. Whenever we could hang we did- I didn't care she was two years younger. To me she was the best, and her house was always tidy and nice"_

_The audiance collectively awwws. Hailey continues. "But one thing she didn't know was how much she meant to me. I guess this could be my last chance to say it: I love you, Jean. Really Love you, I wiah I could give you a final kiss before we left; I regret it everyday"_

_The audiance awws again. "I'm sure you could if you win the games"_

_"I'm planning on doing it" Hailey smiles before the buzzer goes off and Yelene invites Rasmus to the stage._

_I sit there in silence. She likes-likes me? I didn't think something like that was possible.. the important question is.. do I like her back?_

_After a night of searching within myself, I realize I can't, she's just.. Hailey, I can't imagine being more than her best friend, more than her almost sister.._

_That kiss offer is tempting though._

* * *

A loud boom jerks me awake.

The holographic number changed, meaning it's day 5 already. This is the first death of the games since the bloodbath.

I really hope it's not Rainier. 

I watch my step and slide closer to the glass ceiling floor above the cornucopia's range. Nyx is laying against a crate with his face staring blankly up to where I'm hiding. 

That means his eyesight still not returned.

I don't see any of the other careers there, they might've left him to guard- a stupid ass plan if you ask me.

But it might be the chance I have to steal more food since I'm slowly running out. 

Slowly, I go back to where the ladder is, keeping my voice and noise level as quiet as I can. My feet make no sound when I move across the smooth floor.

Something lodges itself in my leg and it takes all my willpower not to scream: there are three little arrows sticking out of my knee, I stepped in one of those fucking traps. 

I won't run now. I need the supplies. 

Every step is torture but I manage to get closer to the right edge of the cornucopia. Nyx didn't notice me so far.

I take two more packs; not checking their content because I fear Nyx would jerk up every second. I look around for the tenth time before bolting back, I hold the torch infront of me when Nyx bolts up. 

"I know someone's in here!" He calls out and moves in my direction. I pick up the pace; but with every step, my leg is protesting and I bite the insidw of my mouth. 

Nyx also pucks up the pace and I run-limp the last few feet to the ladder, I drag myself up and hear the ladder creeks.

Shit.

I know somehow Nyx is getting closer so I run back to my corner. 

Nyx appears up the ladder, using one of the torches to study himself. Hes moving towards my corner.

I chuck my torch as far away as I can. He immediately runs in that direction. "Nyx, what are you doing here?" I hear a girl's voice, I think it's the girl from two, Clarisse, maybe?

She can see, that means she can see me. I take all my bags closer. 

"I heard someone going up the ladder. I had to follow"

"You had one job. That wasn't following tributes. That's our jobs" Says Clarisse. 

"But I took a chance" 

"That's not your job to takw chances ever since your eyesight went" 

Clarisse drags him along to the ladder. "Let's just go, I swept the place there's no one here"

They left and I let out a long sigh of relief. 

I hurriedly open the new packs, one contains bandages. Oh thank god.. my leg is definitely in a bad condition, good thing I didn't pull the arrows yet. 

I won't be running any time soon. 

I count to three and let out a high pitched whimper as I pull them one after the other before wrapping the iodine soaked bandage around my thigh and knee. 

The hologram shows Three girl. 


	6. Day 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean relives Hailey's games

_it's day 6 and Hailey is still alive._

_She hides in the mountains with the little supplies she stole from a dead tribute three days ago. Two days ago there was a tornado in the middle of the night but she managed to survive even that._

_The girls from district 2 and 4 are hunting in the area, district 4 girl tries to convince her ally that the hazzards have a pattern._

_Hailey is hiding behind a pile of snow when the sun starts to slowly set. The career girls decide to sleep at the bottom of the mountain rather than to go back to the cornucopia and I bite my nails hoping Hailey can stay hidden long enough for them to leave without knowing she's there._

_I look at the clock, it's about 23:30 and I have school tomorrow, but I'll damned to miss out when Hailey is close to danger._

_4 girl- I don't even remember her name- leaves her post as guard and starts to climb out the mountain, her moves are calculated and I can't help but hope she'll make a wrong step and fall off._

_4 girl is almost at the top; by this point she's using the road to walk upwards. It's chilly, because I can see the red on her cheeks even through my TV, and wind- another tornado?- starts to gather in the distance._

_4 girl's expression changes at the sight of the upcoming tornado, her mouth curls into a smile of triumph. She runs the last few feet to the top._

_Hailey is already awake and curled up quiet behind her snow pile so the girl wouldn't notice her. The wind hits the mountain with incredible speed and 4 girl drops to her knees, she crawls closer to the snow to avoid it._

_That is when she sees Hailey: I let out a cry._

_Hailey immediately jumps up and starts running- trying really hard to fight the wind and run against it. Four girl is a little more adapt and almost catches her when the wind grows stronger, stronger so Hailey- who weighs only about 90 pounds- is ripped off the ground if it wasn't for Four girl's reflexes that grabs her wrist tight and holds onto a rock with her free hand._

_I can't believe my eyes, Four's girl actually saved her? Why?_

_Whatever the reason, my hopes slowly crush along with my reality as Four girl takes a few steps forward before letting Hailey's wrist go: the wind is enough to send Hailey off the side of the mountain._

_She lands hard in front of the sleeping Two girl._

_The blood is flowing freely and her limbs are twisted in a way that makes me want to puke- but since I barely eaten something, nothing comes out._

_Two girl jumps up awake, when she sees Hailey in her helpless, horrific condition, she brings her knife down on her for mercy._

_The canon fires._

_The next day and the ones after it I only watch the games on mandatory hours, I spend the rest on my schoolwork- desperately trying to find something to keep my mimd off Hailey_

_A dark thought echos in my mind: this could've been me- it should've been me. Hailey could live out the rest of her life here._

_It should have been me and it can still be._

* * *

I spend the day treating my wounds- father got me something for preventing infection- I don't know _what_ he did but I'm grateful.

I spend the night thinking about Hailey, it's night 6, and I'm still alive. 

It should've been me three years ago; it's still can, but as of now, I outlived Hailey. And when I see the giant holographic 7, Hailey will be gone for good. 


	7. Day 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean deals with Hailey's killer on the victory tour.
> 
> In the arena, she runs into some familiar and new faces.

_"Jeanie sweetie, you know you have to come out of the room or else we're gonna be late" my dad is standing behind my locked door, I can hear the urgency in his voice._

_"I don't wanna see that career bitch!" I yell out._

_"Jeanie, as my daughter, you have to. I get that it's hard-"_

_"She killed Hailey, dad! What, am I supposed be cool with it?! Shake her fucking hand?! That is not happening"_

_Behind the door. Dad sighs. "You don't have to be nice; just shake her hand and don't even talk to her. I can promise you that after the speech and the dinner you won't have to see her again"_

_I cluch the ring hard- got it back once the bodies came in- before I open the door. "Promise?"_

_He pulls me into a hug: "Promise. But you have to promise to be polite. Can you do that?"_

_"I can try" I walk past him and leave the house._

_We wait at the station with Kala as district Four's tall escort steps out first, along with who I presume is the stylist. Mentors Achilles Demourt and Atalanta Young are the next to exit the train car. Dad nods at them._

_Medea Vaughn is the last to step out: she's only 3 years older than me, but the stylist made her look way older with that low cut turquoise dress and the high shoes. Her face are a stone mask._

_Kala shakes her hand politely, so does dad, he flashes a quick warning look towards me._

_"I'm really sorry. I know she was your friend" Medea says as she shakes my hand. I don't know how honest her answer is and I don't care. All of my will power is focused on not spitting in her face or coming up with some comback._

_Your apology isn't expected, Four. I wanna spit. But instead I say: "yeah. She was"_

_She lowers her hand and I continue to glare next to my father as the Four possé moves on to meet mayor LeRone._

_"I wanna join Hailey's family next to the banner" I tell dad. "So Medea can see her apology wasn't excepted."_

_Dad looks me up and down. "I'm not sure you're allowed-"_

_"She has a lot of siblings. I can fit in with them and they wouldn't mind"_

_I sneak to where they stand: with our shared_ _dark skin and hair, I fit right in with them, it make it so her two younger brothers stand infront of me and hide my dress._

_Medea begins her speech, she notice me midway and stummers for a minute before continuing. She ends with the usual "Panem today, Panem tommorow, Panem forever" before walking off._

_She looks miserable, good._

_I don't talk during the dinner, I notice her sending me looks throughout but saying nothing._

_I go for a walk as soon as we're done, dad stays a bit to talk to the Four victors and I curl up next to the gate._

_"Your dad is so nice." I don't wanna look up knowing Medea is standing above me. She continues: "you know, I can't imagine growing up here as the only child, That must've been rough. Ever since I got there I could only think: how the fuck did Finnick grew up here?"_

_I can hear the soft crunch of leaves that indicates she's sitting next to me. "I just can't think of another home. Maybe except where the Summit family lives, that's Hailey's family- you know, the girl you killed" I say monotonously._

_"The fall didn't kill her. Ovette did" Medea leans against the cold metal gate. "But you set up her murder. And before that I thought you were gonna save her"_

_"It's a game. You understand the cost of it, even if you didn't go to the arena" Medea says._

_"I was supposed to, but Hailey saved me. And I still might cause I'm a fucking legacy" I kick one of the little stones and watch it fly across the trail._

_"That's another thing I'm sorry for you. I can't imagine going through the reaping every year knowing I'll definitely be picked. That's just being fucked"_

_"The Capitol is fucked" I reply. For a second, i regret what I said, Medea probably likes the Capitol or else she wouldn't be a career._

_"You're right, it is fucked" Medea throws her own stone at what used to be Ringer Avedol's house._

* * *

**Day 7**

I wake up and the 7 shines as usual.

Surprisingly, I only notice the knife aimed at my throat a second later. 

I throw my arm up to try and kick my attacker's arm away but it backfires now that he- it's definitely a he- sits me up and presses the knife to my throat. "Grab your stuff, legacy, we're leaving before they come" 

I don't recognize the voice, but to be fair, Ophelia is the only tribute that really made an impression on me so much that I could connect a name to a face to a district. 

I do as my captor(?) Commands, pick up the three bags I have and follow him, he rushes me around the glass floor and stops before a tile that is definitely a trap. "Hold on. This is one of the traps-"

"Shut up and do as I say. Can you swim?" He ask. "What the fuck does that have to do with-" "answer the fucking question, damn!" 

"Not really. I can not drown if that's what you're suggesting" 

My attacker sighs. "You two don't have any rivers in Eleven or something?!" Before I can ask him what does he mean by that, he steps on the tile and I feel myself free falling.

The fall ends abruptly in cold water and I'm not ready for it. They close on from all sides and I can't see a thing. What is going on?!

Something- my attacker probably- pulls me out, I still can't see a thing except the little light that comes from the 7 hologram. "Move your legs, you want the sharks to find us or not?" I can hear the splashes indicating my attacker's movements, they are steady and efficient, in a way only someone who grew up in the water could. 

So now I know my attacker's district at the very least. 

We reach dry land and I drag myself up as my leg shoots up pain. I can't help but let out a groan. "You're injured" Four boy doesn't sound surprised or sympathetic, he sounds like he's merely stating a fact. "Look, we gotta move forward. They smell blood and the 'makers can definitely make them walk on land if they want to." 

"The gamemakers can't change an animal's feature, they can't make a fish walk on land. My dad studied the mutts" 

"Of course he did" Four boy sighs. "But seriously, we need to move, Jean" 

"So it's _Jean_ now, not legacy? What changed, Four boy? Yeah, I didn't bother learning your name the same way you and your little alliance don't bother learning ours! Why did you even bring me here?" 

"Because I asked him. Thanks by the way, Tate. And he's right, we should keep moving" 

I know that voice. "Rainier, what are you doing with him...here?" 

"Mostly; we're avoiding the other tributes by making ourselves rating worthy" Rainier comes closer into the light, and gives Four boy- Tate- a passionate kiss. 


	8. Day 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James tells Jean what some victors, including him, had to do back in his day.
> 
> In the arena, Tate and Rainier tell Jean how they came to be.

_Mrs Howell is really sweet; and I can see the way my dad looks at her._

_Sure; she's Seeder's granddaughter, I think?. But she's around my dad's age and she's definitely single and into him._

_"Why don't you ever ask her to hang with you?" I ask him as we turn towards the village. Carrying the market food. "I'm too old for that, Jeanie. It's what you teenagers are supposed to be doing"_

_My face sours as soon as he turns my "romance" subject about me. These things aren't for me. Not after Hailey. "still. She's into you, and you sort of like her. Why don't you make a move and be happy again?"_

_Dad scoffs and lifts my ring. "I swore your mother would be my only love"_

_"I'm not asking you to propose to her. Just fooling around, making love, that's oughta make you happy, no? I heard you were quite the charmer in the Capitol back in the day"_

_Dad freezes at my offer. "Let's go inside, I'll tell you of a time when that evil old bastard was in charge"_

_We sit at the living room; drinking tea. "What have you heard about my "charmer days?"_

_"Well. Our history teacher once told us about her embarrassing crush on you when she was around my age, and that you were always going to the Capitol and fooling around with ladies. It made you somewhat more attractive in her eyes" I shrug._

_Dad flinches. "I never wanted to be with all these women. I was forced to"_

_I sit there in silence for a full on minute. "Who forced you?"_

_"The president, the old president. Thankfully. Ms Snow was past that and abolished that tradition"_

_"But. Why would he do that?!"_

_"I was a looker back in the day, you know. People found me attractive and the president thought it can be used for his benefit"_

_I gave him a big hug. "Sorry for assuming"_

_He laughed gently. "Don't be. I haven't told that secret to anyone but your mother, and Kala, she wasn't one back in her day, but she knew a couple. It was an old tradition"_

_"I'm just glad you told me"_

* * *

Even in the basement level of the pyramid, we could still see the holographic 8. In fact; it was our only light source since my torch was left at the bottom of the lake(?) Tate and I fell into. 

A canon woke me up. 

"Can you even see the dead tributes here?" I ask Rainier. "Yeah, they project it even here" 

"How did you even get here anyway? How'd you meet? Rainier and I were tight during preparation week. So I didn't see you two bonding"

Rainier leaned back on one of the bags. "Well; It started when he chased me from the cornucopia, very efficiently, if you ask me" 

"Just when I pinned him down, I noticed I pinned him down on one of the traps, and we both fell" Tate said. "And I almost drowned" Rainier mused. 

Tate sighs. "And I couldn't leave him to drown so I saved him. That was when the sharks almost got us" 

"Don't forget the way you kissed me to save my life" 

Even in the dim light I could see Tate flush. "It's called doing mouth to mouth, genius" 

Rainier ignores Tate's comment and continues. "When I woke up, I was ready to beg for him not to kill me; but apparently his mentor sent him a note that said "don't kill him" so we started talking-"

"Since we had nothing else to do, we told eachother stories about ourselves. Got to know eachother and now we're just.. here, Your partner insisted I'd go get you so I did" Tate made a face. 

"Where'd you get all this stuff?" I ask; pointing at the bags at their feet. 

"We have drinkable water, Tate found a way to the cornucopia and convinced the careers he's still with them. Then he took some shit and brought it back" Says Rainier cheerfully.

"We also have some major sponsors" Tate adds.

I consider their story. I guess it's good to play the romance angles. They are the most popular among the Capitolites and bring the most sponsers but-

"There's one thing that doesn't add up. How'd you know where to step when you went out to get me? " I turn to Tate. 

"Instinct. I guess?" Tate raised his eyebrows.

"And do you think whoever it was at the cornucopia at this time didn't see us?" I ask a different question.

"Well; Nyx is blind and-" 

"I think that trap is the only way to get here" I stand up. "I think each level has this trap. But all the others are too scared to step in it. Because you don't know which tile is which trap" 

The two boys stare at me blankly. "What does it matter?" Asked Rainier.

"If we find where this trap is located in each level; we can use it to escape the cornucopia after we take some stuff" 


	9. Day 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the opening ceremony, James reveals another secret to his soon-to-be tribute daughter. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean, Tate and Rainier plan their move

_Dad closed himself in his room for dinner and I can't blame him:_

_I got reaped, no one was there to save me this time, he could lose me for good._

_As if its not bad enough, the TV plays reruns of the games from 3 years ago, the ones Hailey died in._

_I have learned since then to stop blaming Medea for Hailey's death. Medea might have chosen to volunteer, but she was a victim of circumstance just as Hailey's been._

_The only "bad guys" in these games are the Capitol._

_"Jean. Come with me please" I look up, suprised. My dad is out and talking! I cast a glance towards Rainier, who simply shurgs._

_I do as I'm told. He walks me to the elevator and presses the roof button. The rose gardens above the tribute tower I thought were a rumor were real; and they were stunning._

_"Where are we going; dad?" I ask._

_"To my favorite place in the tower, maybe in the whole Capitol itself" he leads me to a Bush so thick you might think it's hollow inside._

_And indeed it was, dad moved some leaves and I could see a small sitting place, with a chair and a table. "I asked Elenia Snow premission to make this little haven for myself. I come here every year when the tributes..."_

_He doesn't need to finish the sentence._

_"So I wanted to show my baby girl this place. I'm sure you'll find it nice"_

_"You mean; nice for the four days I'm gonna be here" I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but lets face it, I'll probably die and my dad knows it._

_"You don't think you have a chance. Jeanie?"_

_"I'm being realistic. Dad. I might make it far but winning? Have you seen the other tributes?!"_

_"If there's anything being a mentor taught me. Is that there are all kinds of tributes in all kinds of arenas. Skills aren't the only thing to consider. But Speaking of skills, You're gonna need to try and find a weapon to train in tomorrow. You already know everything about survival" dad leans back in the chair, and I can see a tear rolling silently down his cheek, he quickly wipes it off._

_"Have you met Madame Snow?" I ask_

_"Not personally, no. But I can tell she's a lot more compassionate and considering when it comes to the games and the treatment of us victors. Rumors are that she is seeing one of the victors for a while" dad replies._

_If she likes the districts that much.. maybe she can..._

_"Is there any chance that she can stop the games if she wants?"_

_Dad sighs. "Of course not. Just because she's a bit more thoughtful does not mean she doesn't enjoy the bloodshed, and she knows the bloodshed is important to her people. She won't end it for our sake"_

_I stare at my bare feet. How could I think she would do that?! I'm not fucking naive._

_"But" dad sits up and pulls me close to him. "People are talking. About revolting again.. you've read the new poems the brought for literature class"_

_"Yeah. It's the victor from last year, the non binary one. Their skill. I like the way they have with words" I shrug._

_""From the hands of the boy the dove broke free" I think you can see more beyond the symbolism of freedom." Dad smiles._

_I think for a second: Victors, rebelling with small words. Maybe it can help..._

_Maybe we won't have to fight anymore._

_And all I have to do to see the rebelion happening is outlive all the rest._

* * *

**day nine**

"it's crazy how it's day 9 and there are 14 tributes still alive" I stare at the holographic 9. The wet smooth rocks are surprisingly comfortable. 

"Maybe the gamemakers want to take it to the long term. Like; beyond two weeks" says Tate

"But the longest games were 19 days..do you think they aim for that to be the case?" I turn to look at them. 

"Maybe even longer. Who knows?" Says Rainier. 

It was at the moment we heard the canon go off. 

"Who do you think it was for?" I ask. 

"Let's find out" says Tate. 

I sigh. "Are we really doing this? Are we really trying to take stuff from the cornucopia? I'm sure Ophelia and what's her name aren't gonna fall for your trick a second time. And they don't put Nyx on guard again, not after I stole from them" 

Tate signals us to get up. "Which is why we're taking the bags with us" 

I freeze when I realize his intentions. "We're not coming back here, aren't we?" 

Tate looks at the lake, then at me. "No. I realized yesterday staying here is not an option. We don't know which tiles lead here except for the one in the cornucopia's level, and we don't have time to look for the tiles on the upper floor. So I thought we can use the one we know for our advantage" 

"By directing the careers to fall here on purpose" Rainier completes Tate's idea. 

"Yes. Hopefully the mutts will get them before they reach dry land" Tate replies. 

"But what if the cornucopia has more than one guard? You can't distract two people" I throw the bag over my shoulder and Tate lifts a wicked looking sword. "You haven't seen me fight, have you?" He smirks.

"I remember your score though; Perfect Twelve" I mutter. 

"That's right. And for a reason" says Tate. 

"The girl from Two also got a Twelve. What if you have to face her?" 

"Clarisse is their huntress. She goes out to look for tributes, she won't be there" Tate picks up the sword and two of their bags with ease. 

"How do you even go up a level? Is there hidden ladders?" I look towards the dark cave I didn't get a chance to explore; Rainier removes what i believe are vines and in the dim light of a flashlight I can see the ladder, and up in the end, what I presume is the cornucopia. 

"I'm sorry I asked" I sigh. 

"Let me go first, I'm the distraction, remember?" Tate pushes us both and climbs up the ladder easily. "Wait until you hear the fight before you make a run for it" 

I start to climb behind him, the ladder is pretty long, which means the basement floor is pretty huge and bellow the cornucopia, right? Hopefully whoever it is at the cornucopia will be stuck here forever if the mutts don't kill them

The thought sends a shiver down my spine. _I'm actually hoping for someone's violent death._ I force myself to swallow: _It be like that if you wanna survive._ Says a voice that sounds like my dad's, in his younger days, the voice I heard on reruns on TV. 

_I survived. In order to survive you need to want this, to live. Everytime the canon goes off, you need to be happy, to feel relieved. Is that clear?!_

"Crystal" I murmur. 

"What?" Asks Rainier from bellow me. 

"Nothing. I said nothing" I shut my eyes tight and move up the ladder. 

Suddenly Tate stops, which almost causes me to lose my grip. "What is it?" I hiss at him. "You almost made me fall to my death!" 

"It's just Ophelia in there, the hovercraft is just leaving. I don't see Nyx there" Tate hisses back. 

"So he's the canon from earlier?" I ask. "We don't know that. Let's not make false assumptions" Says Rainier from below. 

Tate soundlessly pushes himself up and to the cornucopia level; I can't see anything, let alone how close we are to the cornucopia itself. 

"Tate; is that you?!" Says a girl's voice, not Ophelia's. "Where have you been? You went off again." The girl was still questioning him. 

"Isn't it obvious, Valerie? He found himself a new alliance" this time it was Ophelia, and she sounded bitter; angry even. 

"I have no idea what you are talking about" I can hear Tate reply. Should I step out and run for it?

 _No, don't be stupid. Tate is willing to fight these girls for you to make a run for it. Don't ruin the plan and get yourself killed. Let him be the sacrifice._ the Younger version of dad says in my head again..

To be honest, I'm a little scared of tribute James. 

"Yes you do know. I bet this little alliance of yours stabbed Tate last night and left him to die!" Ophelia is probably taking a few steps closer to Tate now. 

So Nyx is dead. _That's one less powerful enemy._ Tribute James notes. 

"Valerie. You believe me; right? I got trapped in the basement level!" I can hear Tate's pleading voice and I wonder if he's acting or actually showing his emotions to them..

"Well I don't!" I let my head out for a second just in time to see Ophelia lounge at Tate. "Go go go!" I hiss at Rainier as I pull myself up. 

We're surprisingly close to the cornucopia, but Ophelia and Tate are fighting close to the semicircle of plates, Valerie is, by some kind of miracle, with her back to us. Rainier dives into the mouth of the cornucopia with me. 

"What's the plan?" He askes quietly. 

"Take every easy thing you can find here and pray Valerie isn't gonna turn around anytime soon. We're gonna run to the ladder there" I point to the ladder I used back in the first day. "We should even step up a level to throw the careers off" 

"Okay. Sounds like a solid plan" Rainier 

I gather two blankets and a first aid kit when I see it: two matching swords I recognize from my training- since I chose them as my weapon.

Sais. 

Rainer is digging though the piles to see if he can find non perishable food. "I found some cans of tuna and pickles. He whispers and stuffs it in his bag. I do the same to the blankets and kit, the sais I attach to my belt. 

It was at this moment both of us heard a familiar cry of pain: Rainier's head turned quickly to where Tate was lying on the floor, he dragged himself away from the two, clutching his side, Ophelia was twirling a spear, ready to strike him. 

_Run away with Rainier, save yourself!_ Tribute James was yelling fanatically in my head. 

But I knew the older version of my father, Tribute James might've abandoned Tate to die, Victor James might not forgive me for this, but Tribute Jean won't let Tate die for her like that. 

So I changed with marvelous speed towards Ophelia, knocking her down. I barely had time to pull my sais out before the two of us- and Valerie- were free falling into the water. 

The hit takes out all of my air, but I'm able to get my head out of the water. A canon fires.

The bandages slip when I try to paddle effectively towards the smooth rocks I know are there, but the holographic 9 is my only source of light and I can't feel the rocks under my feet.

My heart starts beating faster and I can feel my arms tiring to keep my body afloat. 

_Where the fuck is that shore?!_

A low whistle fills the basement level and with my last strength I can recognize the hovercraft coming to pick up a body. 

Wait, the hovercraft! 

I paddle as fast as my tired arms allow me in it's direction when I feel the smooth rocks beneath my feet. _Oh thank goodness._

I drag myself onto the shore and try to steady my heartbeat.

 _You're still alive, genius._ Tribute James sounds bitter in my head. I still don't like him, but if that's how my brain is giving me advice, I guess I should take it. 

I wait on the smooth rocks for who knows how long. But soon enough, the anthem was playing, even here

The faces shown were familiar: Nyx, confirming he is dead, and Valerie, who I'm guessing landed on the rocks instead of in the water.

I freeze. Because I know what that means: 

It means Ophelia is here with me.


	10. Day 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean remembers the first time James brought her to the train station to meet a victor. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean is all on her own again, with Ophelia lurking somewhere in the basement level..

" _Daddy, why do I have to dress pretty?"_ _I ask, mom is giving me weird looks._

_"Because you are going on TV, Jeanie" dad kneels before me and straightens my skirt._

_"James, she's not ready yet. She's 6!" Mom stands up._

_Dad's eyes were sad for a second. "It's the last thing I want for her. But the people in the Capitol want to see her already. They're already asked tons of questions during the games this year."_

_Mom leaves the room for something and dad caps my head in his face. "Jeanie. You learned in school about the districts and the rebellion. Right?"_

_"Yeah, it's why we have the hunger games. We're not allowed to watch yet; but I know they exist.." I don't understand what does it have to do with looking pretty._

_Mom steps out of their room dressed pretty in a clean long white dress and sighs. "Let's get this over with"_

_We take a car to the train station, I know what a victory tour is: Mrs Kahra told us about it last week. I am going to meet someone from another district!_

_The victor of this year's games is Alexa Elle Sheridan. I know she is from district one, so she must be happy to be the victor- I heard that in the upper districts people go to the games by choice._

_The escort for district 1 steps out first, she looks like our escort with her purple swirly hair and glitter make up. After her steps out another woman who is too old to be Alexa._

_"Who is that, daddy?"_

_"That's Amethyst Wheeler, Jeanie sweetie. She's a mentor for district one just like you father is to us" says mom gently._

_There are people with cameras around us, I barely know which one to look at. And they all start flashing and gushing when the door opens one more time and Alexa Elle steps out._

_I can't help but stare in awe: she looks so pretty with her blonde locks flowing down to her waist in curls, and they even have little sliver gemstones entangled in them! She wears a long green dress with a big gap in the front and high heeled shoes. She looks like the doll I got for my birthday last year._

_But her smile doesn't reach her eyes like it does when dad smiles at me._

_She shakes old Chaff Mitchell's hand and Kala and dad's. She bends down to shake my hand, "Hello darling! Nice to meet you"_

_I am struck for a couple of seconds. She's standing so close to me!. But I remember the manners lessnons dad used to teach me. So I shake her hand; "nice to meet you too, Miss Sheridan"_

_The district One escorts lets out a squeal. "Ugh, so polite! I never expected that considering what district we're standing in"_

_Dad only flinches at her insult. Alexa ruffles my hair one last time before walking gracefully back to where the mentor and the escort were standing. "Let's do this"_

_And then they walk off._

_"They will be back for dinner" dad says to me. "Now you go with mom home okay? I'll be back with Alexa and the One team"_

_I do as I'm told, I know better than to not listen to dad, he only does what's best for me._

_I spend the rest of the day in my room, when the camera crew returns with Alexa and her team._

_"Hey again darling." Alexa smiles at me again. She's wearing a different dress this time; but she still looks like a doll come to life._

_I can see mom sending her the glare. Like she glares at those who look at daddy with disgust. "Sorry if it bothers you that I'm taking to your daughter, but I have a sister her age and to be honest, I've never seen anyone with this skin complexion." Alexa Elle apologized._

_"Of course you haven't." Mother presses her lips into a thin line._

_"In district One we learn to see the beauty in the unique. Here" Alexa takes off one of her bracelets and gives it to me. "Keep it"_

_During dinner dad talks with Amethyst and asks Alexa how she's settling down in the village. "I'm just glad I don't have to be in the circle" Alexa notes in relief. "I would've done whatever I can to protect my loved ones but... I'm just really relieved" she lets out a shy smile._

_I don't know what they mean by that but I gave up on trying to understand, they will explain it to me when I'm older anyway._

_Who knew people from district 1 can be so nice?_

* * *

**day Ten**

I barely slept at all last night, instead I watched the hologram change from a 9 to a 10 and forced myself to stay alert even when sleeping. 

Ophelia is here somewhere, she's still alive and she might be coming for me. If only I could find the ladder and climb out.

Even if Valerie and Nyx are dead, I still have to worry about the Two's who are probably settling in the cornucopia's again, I bet they think Ophelia is bound to die so there is no actual pack. 

Since I don't have a flashlight, I keep to the shore, Tate's old pack is (thankfully) waterproof and I managed to salvage a loaf of bread and an apple I took from the cornucopia, as well as the blankets. 

A canon fires and I jump. 

Twelve dead. That's half of us by day 10. 

I have a feeling this is gonna be a long year for the games. 

The canon could be for Ophelia, though I doubt it. She's probably walking around blindly, soaking wet and pissed. 

I dig in deeper whithin the bag. _come on, there's gotta be something that lights up in here somewhere!_ Tribute James is back, he's just a way for my survival instincts to communicate with me. 

Found something! Tate's old survival pack has a little lantern that works on battaries. I light it up when I see the body floating close to where I sit.

Ophelia. 

I hear no hovercraft whistle, that means she's miraculously still alive, she's lying face first in the water, her blonde locks are floating around, covering it.

I have no choice but to drag her on the rocks. 

_She doesn't look so threatening now._ I bite my lip. _but she does look familiar up close._

A memory flashes in my mind, when dad took me with him to a victory stop back in the 99th games. Alexa Elle did say she had a sister my age...

She's a legacy just like me.. 

_It doesn't matter what she is. There is only one winner and you better end this strong opponent already. All you have to do is turn to the cave area with your lantern and find the way out._ Tribute James notes. 

_But she can be useful to help you fight whoever it is at the cornucopia..._ Says a new voice I don't think I recognize. Maybe Alexa Elle? 

Tribute James might be the survival instincts in me, but Victor James hopes his daughter wins with as less kills as possible. Victor James was the one who raised me after all. 

_I better not regret this._

I kneel before Ophelia and tilt her nose so I can press my fingers to her chest, I keep a study pace like Dad once told me to. I don't know how long I did it, but suddenly Ophelia tilted herself to the side, coughing out the water. 

She lets out a few heavy breaths before she picks herself up on her elbows. Her eyes widen in the dark when she sees me. 

"You saved me. Why?" 

"Well, we're both legacies. And you're lucky you have a nice sister" 

Ophelia chuckles for a bit and pulls her knees to her chest. She's clearly shivering. 

I have two blankets in Tate's bag, the ones I took from the cornucopia. _You're just doing her a favor, you don't have to give her more than what she has. And who's to say she won't backstab you?._

I'm seriously starting to hate the younger version of my dad. I prefer the older version, who taught me to be kind as I can be and asked me to promise to take a life only when it's necessary.

"Come here. I have an extra" I call out to her. In the little light I got from the lantern I can see the gratitude on her face as she takes one. "Thank you, again." She mutters. 

First Tate, now Ophelia. I'm really starting to win over by careers, aren't I?

But it's okay. It's not their fault for growing up like this. I've long since learned to blame the Capitol. 


	11. Day 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ophelia Sheridan grew up in the shadows. For the past ten years it was "Alexa Elle here" and "Alexa Elle there" she almost understood why Cashmere Richson volunteered the very next year after her brother did. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean and Ophelia get to understanding eachother, in a way.

_Every time the extended family members come to visit they always comment about how Alexa Elle was the savior of our family._

_Thinking back, I barely remember the years before she won, but I'm sure living in a mediocre house, making the pearl jewelleries for the Capitol society is better than being constantly on camera as the next "keeping up with the Richsons"_

_"Phili, we're gonna miss the chosing of the volunteers!" Sliver is tagging at my arm and brings me back to reality_

_The academy is the only place I can barely escape Alexa. I see her once a year for the volunteer choosing, but she never stops by to see me train._

_Well, the feeling is mutual, "sis"_

_"Are you excited to be one of the finalists?" Silver was mumbling excitedly like a puppy._

_I sigh. "Honestly. I don't know if I wanna be chosen or not"_

_"Are you kidding?! Going into the games is like.. the best thing ever! You always rant about not getting the spotlight. Well here's your chance!"_

_She has a point. The games are my only chance of making a name out of myself. Making a brand even, Alexa has a modeling contract and a line of perfume, who's to say I can't to it either.?_

_But is it worth outlasting 23 other people? Can I even beat these odds?_

_As we reach the dinning hall where thr stage with the stand is already set. The "mini reaping" is an event everyone heard about. And I can see the little twelve-ish newbies chattering in their groups, almost as excited as Sliver. I take one of the four chairs in the front: Flair and Venus are sitting next to me. "You're not it, Sheridan" Flair mouthes._

_The ten victors step into their assigned seats, from elderly Ruby to Blaze, having won only two yeara ago. I avoid my sister's skimming eyes, sitting next to Blaze._

_It's my last year, my last chance. You're not the only savior of this family._

_"our volunteers this year have been picked by our newest victors Alexa Elle Sheriden and Blaze DeGlim!" Headmaster Ray always excites the trainees by pretending to be Yelene Ackerman. Complete with her nastly voice._

_"Our Male volunteer is: Nyx Gearda!" Cheer erupts throughout the room as Nyx gets up, I know the guy, we had a quick fling after the first kill tests. Both of us needed to release the stress and guilt that followed._

_Mr Ray continues. "Our female volunteer is: Ophelia Sheriden!"_

_It's me, it's me! I get up to the sound of applause from my classmates, they know to give mad props to a legacy._

_But when I meet my sister's eyes, I don't see anger, or happiness, she's horrified._

_The next day- reaping day- I fix my hair in front of the mirror for the tenth time when Alexa enters. "I can't believe you're going in" she mutters._

_"Get used to it. I'm the volunteer, and I'm coming back with a crown on my head" I bite my lip._

_Alexa's faces sours._

_"Why are you so glum; you chose me. Remember?"_

_"I didn't chose you, Ophelia" Alexa looks down at her shoes_

_My eyebrows furrow in confusion. "You didn't?"_

_"Blaze did. I chose the male volunteer. The last thing I want is you going into the games"_

_I throw the brush in anger. "Of course you don't. You wanna be the savior, the only victor of this family!"_

_"It's not winning I'm worried about, Ophelia. What happens if you lose?" Alexa's gaze is cold._

_The nerve she has! "You don't think I can do this, do you? Of course you don't, you don't know what I can and can't do because you never show up to see me train! Well I worked my ass off for 8 years trying to be more like you, so for once, in my goddamn life, people would see me as more than your sister!"_

_Alexa puts a hand on my shoulder. "I get that you're angry. I get you were chosen and there's nothing I can do to change that. But you don't know the games like I do. I'm....worried. I don't doubt your skills- you were chosen for a reason- But the games are not a joke, and the other tributes are not to be taken lightly. Just.. come back to me okay? I promise to be a better sister"_

_"I'm planning on coming back anyways. But for once I'm not doing this for you" I shove her out of the way and step out the bathroom to get dressed._

* * *

**Day Eleven**

I watch Ophelia curled up in the blanket, her clothes are drying on a rock close by, and she keeps herself covered with the blankets and her underthings.

She's lying with her back to me, not moving at all. I guess that's a trick she learned in her many years of training. 

She turns to me, awake, her blue eyes unreadable. "You didn't sleep at all last night" 

"No" I simply answer.

"But you look like shit. You should close your eyes for at least a few minutes" she rolls over to her stomach. 

"I don't trust that you wouldn't slit my throat when I sleep" 

Ophelia sighs. "I wouldn't trust me either, but I don't have any weapon on me. And don't forget you saved my life. I owe you" she twirls a wet curl around her finger. 

In the holographic light of the 11, I can see the bare skin of her shoulders. I gotta say, I might not do romance, but.. her skin looks so smooth and silky.... 

_What is this?! Finding the enemy hot? Cut it out!_ Tribute James is yelling at me. 

She raises her eyebrows. "See sonething you like?" I can't help but blush. 

_"_ no- no, nothing" 

Ophelia winks and sits up, still curled in the blanket. "I'm serious, Jean. I'm not gonna do anything.. just.. go to sleep" 

I don't know If she's lying or not, but damnit; I am really tired. So I lie down on the rocks and close my eyes, holding the sais with a tight knuckled grip. 

I open my eyes- good, that means I'm still alive- to see the lantern and two parachutes next to me. Ophelia is dressed in the tank top and the long khakis, but she ditched the jacket. 

"Your leg is getting better, how did you even get that injury?" 

"Stepped in one of the traps" I crawl to where I put the medkit and pull out the last bandage. 

"So how long were you in an alliance with Tate?" She asks. 

"Not much, like, two days. But he and Rainier- my district partner- were in it since the beginning- why would you say "were"? I'm still gonna try and find them" 

Ophelia leans her cheek on her plam. "Okay. Well. There was a canon when you slept-" 

"It's not for one of them" I cut her off

"We'll see tonight" 

About two hours later, the anthem did play, the seal bore Damen from 10's picture. "Clarisse and Jorden work them fast" Ophelia mutters.

I turn to her. "How many kills do you have?" 

"Two. The boy from 3 and the boy from 5" Ophelia's blue eyes were liquid in the hologram's light. 

Is she...tearing up?

 _Of course she isn't, she's a career._ Tribute James and victor James hate the careers. I wonder how older James feel about me teaming up with two of them. 

Ophelia opens the bag and pulls out the bread, she takes a piece and tears it into two smaller pieces. She eats the smaller one. "I thought you careers can't deal with hunger like the outliars do" 

Ophelia shurgs. "In school we- the girls- are taught to be slim and pretty for the cameras, I got used to not eating much. It might not be the best way, but the method helps us keep longer in the games without eating" 

That's horrible, to starve the girls on purpose for _the cameras?!_ When you live in district 1 of all places?!.

"That... in Eleven people are actually starving and they teach you to starve there on purpose?" 

Ophelia bites the inside of her mouth. "I- I didn't know you guys starved.. you grow all the food though?" 

"You think the people are allowed to eat it? No. I might grew up in the best way possible but I see my school mates and my friends. The punishments are severe" 

Ophelia leans back. "That's just fucked"

Funny; I remember how another career once said that to me. And my exact reaction.

The Capitol is fucked. 


	12. Day 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean watches the games for the first time. 
> 
> In the arena, we see through Rainier's POV of the last few days and day 12.

_Every time I brought up the games when mother was still alive, she dismissed it. To her, the games were something in the far future; that I'll only have to worry about in two years. Only then she would show me the games._

_Even until her very last day; even in that year of sickness and weakness, she still refused I'll watch them. And I just turned 10._

_but now I'm alone for the first time in my life. Sure, I'll stay at Hailey's place once the reaping is over, and she can't tell me what to do anymore: since the television at Hailey's house doesn't let you choose what rerun games you wanna watch, I'll guess I'll watch this year's._

_"Do you think our tributes have a chance this year?" I ask Hailey._

_"I don't think so. But that's just standards. Everyone know they won't"_

_"C'mon. I know my dad can work something out. He's the best mentor ever" I tell her as we walk the road behind her parents._

_"He is trying. But it depends on the Capitol people and whether they like our tributes or not. And they mostly base is on looks. Neither Kiera or Yake are pretty much" said Hailey._

_"And don't forget the careers" I add._

_We sit through the preparation week, we see the costumes and the scores- nothing impressive from our district- and the interview._

_The girl from district Two catches my interest, she tells people about her ex boyfriend- the boy who won last year. She is resentful of him. And I can tell she is gonna be a big player this year._

_Kiera is on stage and I feel bad for the 14 year old who mumbles her way though the interview as Yelene tries really hard to break her shell._

_As soon as the interview is over Hailey turns off the TV. "We have to prepare for mandatory viewing hours tomorrow, they would want us to watch the bloodbath"_

_As a child of a victor, mandatory hours are not mandatory for me. But now I'm staying at Hailey's, and the rule no longer applies._

_If I'm being honest, I'm a bit excited, this is the first time I can do something mother always told me I can't, and the games can't be THAT bad and bloody._

_Can't they?_

_The next morning I follow Hailey's parents and siblings to the square in front of the justice building: where the reaping is usually. We stand in a spot far enough from the peacekeepers eyes but still enough so I can see the screen properly._

_The screen comes to life with a flicker and all conversations stopped: the camera showed Yake going up the tube as the arena rolls into view:_

_The tributes stand inside of a room, tall enough so the cornucopia fits inside of the room. "Let the One hundred and third games begin!"_

_The 60 seconds I know the tributes have to wait for are dedicated to showing the viewers the arena: it's actually a 5 store building, and the cornucopia is on the tallest floor. Around the building there is nothing but desert, but there is still a door, I wonder if the tributes will be smart enough to see it and use it._

_The 60 seconds are over, Kiera runs away without looking back, but Yake runs into the circle of the cornucopia and reaches for a bag. His fingers close on the bag and I feel the hope bubbling in. You got it! Now run for your life!_

_My hope is crushed under the weight of the shock when the district 2 girl shoves a sword through his back. I let out a squeal_

_Non of the other people in the square make a sound._

_Blood is flowing in an alarming rate. coloring his shirt red. He drops flat on his face_

_I cover my mouth so I don't scream, Hailey grabs my hand._

_There are 7 more deaths at the cornucopia besides Yake. And each of them more gruesome then the other: Two Boy shoves a spear though 12 boy's stomach, Four girl's trident leaves three bleeding holes in 6 girl's chest. One girl's arrows pierce though 9 boy's neck._

_I don't talk as the peacekeepers dismiss the people to leave. Hailey drags me back all the way back to her house. I still see Yake's bloody corpse lying first face on the concrete._

_"Poor Rainier" said Hailey quietly._

_"Who?" Is all I ask, quietly._

_"His brother, he goes to school with us; theyre both are the sons of Ms Herya the healer, remember?"_

_I try to remember the boy she's talking about. A boy around my age who leaves early to help his mother take care of the wounded._

_"Yeah. I remember."_

_All the dead kids star in my continued nightmares. When my father returns I break down as he holds me. "It would've happened no matter what" he whispers._

_I don't talk to Two girl- Carmen De Silva- when she comes to the victory tour, and she doesn't feel like talking either._

_All I could think was poor Rainier. Standing along his mother below Yake's banner._

* * *

**Flashback, Day 9**

**Rainier**

I run after Jean as soon as she charges at Ophelia, Tate is lying on the sand, clutching his side. But Ophelia could definitely kill Jean, and there's also the Valerie girl...

Suddenly they dissapear through the sand, thrown into the basement level. 

"No, Jean!" I yell out as the sand slowly reshapes again into the red tile I've seen before. The one Tate and I fell through. 

A canon fires. 

_Oh no, Tate!_

he is still alive, clutching his side, and he's pale, his breaths are heavy and I ran to grab another one of the first aid kits I saw at the cornucopia's mouth. 

I ran back to him and press the bandage to his side. Tighting it around the wound. "We.. need to go- Clarisse.. is gonna be back-" 

"I know, we have to go up the levels" I let him lean on me and pick him up. I half drag him to the ladder, the climbing is hard and I can see his face wince in the dark. I can hear footsteps on the other side of the first floor. "I think Ophelia got someone. Let's go, Jordan!" It's Clarisse; I drag Tate into the shadows and pray to whoever I can that Clarisse and Jordan won't see us. 

They don't, they climb down the ladder and into the cornucopia. "Something happened here" I can hear Jordan say. "I know. Can't believe we went on a freaking hunt when shit got real down here!" Clarisse replies. 

"We need to go another level" Tate's voice is no louder than a whisper. 

"No. Clarisse and Jordan would find us as the levels grow smaller" I argue. Leaning on the cold wall. 

With a _creak_ Tate and I see a passege open up right where a wall used to be. I drag Tate into it and it closes behind us. Golden lights flicker to life. "This arena never stops surprising me" I mutter.

But the lights are strong, I can actualy, for once, see what I'm doing. I take a thread and needle and bite my lip. I've done this before, I was training to take on my mom's job after she dies.. but Tate.. and what if the canon was Jean?!.. my hands are shaking and I force myself to focus:

_Emotions can't get in your way when you stitch someone up, son. You must put them aside._

I bury all the fear in my stomach as I focus on the task at hand. I disinfect the wound and carefully stitch it up before covering it with more bandege. I lean close to his chest, scared I was too late in my treatment..

His chest still rose. 

I collapse against the wall when I notice the passage opens into a big room not far from where we laid. 

And the giant snake mutt was the first thing I saw. 

Without thinking, I grab Tate's sword. I never used a weapon like that, it was heavy for me to hold, the snake dove, waiting to sink it's teeth in me. I dodged it barely, sliding below it and slashing a gap in it's stomach. It hissed and moved forward towards Tate. 

This time, I went with a stab, as hard as I could in between the mutt's scales. The pissed off mutt turned to me, good, At least I got it away from Tate.

I retreat into the room and grab one of the torches. Just as the snake opened its mouth to attack, I threw the torch in, and then- don't ask me how- shoved the sword as deep as I could at the side of it's head. It's body blew up into ashes and I collapsed, blackness surrounding me. 

**Day 12**

The first thing I see is the blinding golden lights. 

"Rainier. Oh my- I thought you would never wake up!" I recognize Tate's voice from next to me. 

"How long was I out?" My voice is dry. "Three days. You got splashed with some of the snake mutts venom!" 

"You saw me?" I coughed.

"I was half unconscious but I did! You took down a mutt!" Tate plants a kiss on my lips. I don't know when I started actually enjoying our little scam of a relationship but his kiss felt _Good._

"When I fuily woke up. I saw you laying there. And I begged for sponsers to send us something that would save you. And they did and now you're finally awake!" Tate helps me sit up. 

"Jean.. is she.?" 

Tate shakes his head. "There's a little projector that shows the day's number and the fallen tributes at night, the only dead people are the boy from 10 and.. and Valerie" he looks away.

"I'm sorry...about her" I take his hand, almost instinctively.

"She would've been a cool addition to the alliance" Says Tate softly. 

I can only hope Jean is okay, but for now. I have Tate, and as soon as we felt better, we would be on the look for her.

But for now, the secret room is our home base.


	13. Day 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James lets Jean watch a rerun of his games.
> 
> In the arena we continue to see through Rainier's eyes as he comes to a realization about Tate

_Everytime dad comes back home he comes back with a haunted expression._

_After watching Yake getting brutally murdered I've started to get used to the nature of the games, Kiera didn't make it past day 3._

_Mother once said it's the mentoring job taking its toll on him, but whatever it is, he never came home smiling, he only did that with me and mom, but mom is gone now and his smiles are so few....._

_"Mrs Summit told me you watched the games this year" he says blankly._

_"I don't have mother to keep me from watching anymore. And I'm ten; I'm old enough"_

_"Are you?"_

_I know he's worried for me, He can see it on my face- even though I got better at hiding my feelings he can always tell: especially when it has to do with the games, he can always tell._

_"Yes." I assure him. "It's kind of a rite of passage, especially since I will probably be sent into those games in a few years"_

_Something shifted in his eyes: fear. I know I probably won't escape the arena. "You know what, Jeanie, maybe we should start preparing for the worst. okay? I'll teach you every survival strategy I know, every arena I've encountered and what I've learned from Kala and the other victors." He sits in front of the TV and clicks on the games Channel: every capitol TV personality is still gushing over Carmen de Silva and her fight with her victor ex._

_Dad clicks on the "rerun" option, that allows you to choose a year to watch the games of; I catch names of legends popping up: Mags, Chaff, Haymitch, Finnick, Kala, Katniss, Prim, Atalanta...._

_Dad pauses in front of an game year that reads: "88th annual hunger games- Victor: James Trojillio"_

_I let out an unintentional gasp. "Mom said to never remind you of it. She knew how hard it was for you..."_

_"You need to know; to be prepared and learn from what I did, I'll show you my friends' games. You are gonna learn to survive no matter what: starting with me"_

_He exhaled slowly and pressed play._

* * *

**Day Thirteen**

**Rainier**

Our day started with a canon. 

"Another one dead" Tate mumbled, half asleep. I only now notice how close we're lying, I'm lying on my side, squeezed close to his- he's lying on his back and I can see the golden lights reflecting his sandy blonde hair. 

I kind of like being in this position. 

Now he opened his eyes for real. I can finally see his eyes in light that isnt the soft blue light of the holographic number: I can actually see his light sea green eyes sparkle like glass. 

"Now that I can actually fucking see them, Your eyes are so unique, I never saw anyone with eyes like that in Eleven" I murmur. 

Tate laughed softly. "I've never seen eyes like yours in Four either: sure, people have brown eyes, but dark like yours? Never. I can almost see my reflection in them" 

I don't know wether he acted this line up but I really wanted him to continue staring into my eyes... 

I cut the staring contest short and sit up. "I need to change your bandage" 

Tate groaned. "I'm sure it's fine!" 

"No. I bet You haven't changed it in those three days I was unconscious. It could be infected; now shut up and try not to yell and bring Clarisse and Jordan running" 

He mumbled a few swears but lifted his shirt so I can peel off the dirty bandege. I clean up the wound again- the edges aren't yellow, that's a good sign, and the stitches are miraculously okay enough. But we're gonna need a knife to cut them soon. I replace the bandages as quick as I can; ignoring the winces of pain twisting Tate's beautiful face.

"Hey" he said between winces and whimpers. "Doesn't this feel a bit familiar?" 

"To what?" I finish taking care of the wound. 

"Like thirty years ago, there was healer from the outlying district that teamed up with a boy from Four" 

"Yeah, Prim Everdeen, the sister legacy" I reply. 

"Well" Tate sat up. "You're a healer from an outlying district, I'm your pretty district Four unlikely Ally.. we also have a legacy with us on the alliance.. all we need is to get Ophelia Sheridan on board and we're practically a reenactment!" 

I bite my lip, out of all of these tributes in that alliance, Prim was the victor, with Cassandra the legacy and district 4's Kaito dying a horrible death. 

Not that I would pass on being the victor of this year.. after everything my mom went through after Yake died, I can't allow her to lose another son. 

My biggest problem right now is Tate.

I don't do well in combat, save for that snake mutt I killed- out of pure adrenalin and fear- I'm almost positive I can't do that to a person. Especially not Tate.. 

I can still feel the cold of the water hitting me, how everything went black when I felt the air getting pushed into my lungs, feeling Tate's strong hands against my chest. Talking to him in the little light we had. Him mouthing _kiss me for the cameras_ knowing only I can see... his lips against mine...

I'm entering dangerous territory here: Tate would never like me for real, he would've never spared a glance towards me back home- I don't know if he even into boys. 

One's thing for sure: In love or not, I will never be able to kill Tate Haybrook. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Living tributes update!
> 
> Ophelia (1)  
> Clarisse, Jordan (2)  
> Tate (4)  
> Ethan (6)  
> Leslie, Cory (8)  
> Angus (9)  
> Jean, Rainier (11)


	14. Day 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean watches the reaping and interview of James' games year. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean and Ophelia are running low on suplies and plan a course of action.

_The video begins with the usual Capitol seal, and moves on to the reaping:_

_There's the usual career kids eager to stand on that stage, each more bloodthirsty than the other. I smile to myself knowing non of them would come back._

_Dad gives me a meaningful look, as if he knows what I'm thinking. "They're might've been vicious and mean, but you can't smile at their deaths; that makes you no better than the Capitol citizens watching" he says._

_The reaping moves on to districts 5, 6 and 7. When the girl- Anika- goes on stage, dad looks away._

_I barely know anything about his games, but I can tell she was a big player that year. Was my dad her ally._

_A darker thought forged in my mind: did he kill her?_

_Soon enough the reaping reaches district 11, the girl is a 13 year old named Wren, the escort calls for "James Trojillio!" And I hold my breath._

_Seeing my dad as a seventeen year old is a shock: first of all, his hair isn't salt and pepper like it is now, it's all black and untamed, curls that sway in the wind- that I realize I got from him- and a strong, working body from the fields. He is tall, and his dark eyes surveyed the aisle, looking for the cameras._

_I never realized how similar we look._

_After the reaping, the editors cut off to opening ceremony, dad and Wren are dressed in green with crowns of fruit, as they always dress our tributes. An old familiar man welcomes them and wishes them luck_

_I gasp, I knew my dad was from the old generation, the one before Elenia became president, before Yelene became the mistress of ceremonies. But I've never seen President Corialanus Snow congratulate the tributes, I was barely 6 when he died._

_The scores are read by a man who isnt Yelene, but since she never stops talking about him, I know exactly who he is (or.. was, apparently he died 2 years ago)._

_"Back then Caeser was still Master of ceremonies" dad comments. "I don't know If I prefer him, or Miss "tell me everything" they are both kind of insufferable"_

_Anyway, the number 7 hovers next to my dad's picture._

_The interviews are cut short; the only interview they show is the one with my dad, since he is going to be the victor, after all. _

_"What do you miss the most about your home?" Caeser asks._

_"I guess the view. Working in the fields gave me beautiful view of the sun each morning"_

_"I'm sure it was lovely. Anything else?"_

_"Well, my family... they must be worried. And also someone else" Dad freezes like he said something bad, but Caeser sees this and urges him to continue. "Oh? Do tell. Who is this someone?"_

_"a girl. I promised her we would make it official if I came back" dad bites his lip._

_"Is there anything you'd like to say to your sweetheart?" Caeser raises an eyebrow._

_James took off the ring I recognized mom always wore on her finger. "I'm bringing you this ring back, with my hands. My living hands. And I'll put it on your finger, I swear"_

_I feel the warm tears coming down my face: Maybe I shouldn't have watched this after said girl was dead, but it was nice to know my dad never gave up on her._

* * *

**Day 14**

**Jean**

We spent the next two days talking, what else could we do?

I got to know Ophelia a little better, hell, we even fought off the shark mutt I knew the gamemakers sent after us, funny, it kind of brought us together.

"So, what weapons can you use, out of everything that was in the cornucopia?" I ask her sometimes on day 14. 

Ophelia thinks for a second. "long sword, short swords, daggers, and I have a decent throwing arm. Nyx used a battle axe, Jordan is an archer and a mace user, Clarisse's weapon of choice is a spear and...Tate is also a sword fighter" 

But I already knew that. 

"I gotta say. You do a decent job of using these" she points to my belt, where my sais were attached. 

I reach for the bags and dig through them. We're down to a bag of beef jerkys. Ophelia makes a face. "I can't eat these. I'm a vegetarian" 

"It's the only thing we have left. And how can you be a vegetarian-" _when you kill in cold blood._ The Tribute version of my dad, James, the survivalist in me, notes. "-in a game like this" I say instead. 

Ophelia lays down, her blonde curls look almost white in the dim light of the holographic 14. She looks a lot like her victor sister, which I only met twice.. 

"I never liked meat. And once I watched a documentary about the animals in Ten and decided I never want to eat meat again. The school saw it as a good thing because I ate nuts and stufd and in smaller doses. It kept me skinny and pretty so they approved it"

I still can't wrap my head over the fact the career training academy starves their girls on purpose to be pretty, sure, it helps them survive without food longer, but other than that.. what is the reason?

"Keep the jerky to yourself. I'm sure I can handle a day without eating those" she muttered; but I stayed unconvinced. "You barely eaten anything yesterday, take at least one" 

"No" she brings her knees close to her stomach. "We can go tomorrow to check on the cornucopia and take things from there. Maybe even find Tate and your partner"

I can't argue with that idea. I was sick and tired of siting here, too scared to go up to the cornucopia. And the suplies there may save our lives here. But I need the strong fighter- who I saved for this exact reason- to get stronger. And for that, she needs to eat _Something._

 _Why do you care, again? She's not your friend, or your ally. The only true ally you have is yourself; and possibly, Rainier. Don't trust those careers because they did things for you._ Tribute James never leaves my mind. But sometimes, I learned to tune him out.

As if on que, a parachute materialized out of thin air. "It's for us!" I caught it. It was marked 1 and 11. So dad and Alexa Elle Sheridan probably joined their bank accounts to send us this.

"This" was a package filled with goods: a pot of rice with sweet potatoes and two cans of pickles, clean clothes, a big water bottle and a shiny sword, clearly made for Ophelia. 

"Now you have to eat" I commanded. Ophelia sighed. "Yes. Maybe I have to" 

"Yeah. Recharge yourself. We're going to raid the cornucopia tomorrow, no, more then that, we are going to take it for ourselves!" 


	15. Day 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean watches her father's games
> 
> In the arena, Jean and Ophelia make a move on the cornucopia.

_the bloodbath of the 88th year is no different than what I saw this year._

_The careers slashed and stabbed at anyone coming closer ro the cornucopia, and the red staining the ground seened out of place in all of the pink around._

_It was almost comical how every detail of the arena was a shade of pink: the cornucopia, the grass around the pedestals, the woods all around, even the tributes' outfits for the year._

_Dad bolted out of there without looking back, the 13 year old girl from district 7 was running in a route parallel to his own._

_Suddenly, she tripped, letting out a squeal as she did. Dad turns around in a split, crossing through the bushes. "Please don't kill me!" She pleaded._

_"Why would I?" He asks, offering her a hand. "Because I'm fodder, and I think I twisted my ankle..don't waste your time on me. I'm no use to you as an ally"_

_"Your name is Anika.. am I wrong?"_

_Anika nods, confused. "No, I'm- I'm Anika..and you're James" she stands shakly on her feet._

_"Here, hop on my back, I'll give us a lift to one of those higher trees, you know how to climb..right?"_

_She scoffs as if he asked if she can count to three. "Of course. Can you?"_

_"I think I got it in me" James picks her up easily and continues to run at the same pace. They reach deeper into the pink woods when Anika tags at his jacket. "This tree. Let's climb on this one"_

_It's an oak, it's weird to see an oak dyed in dark fuchsia pink._

_He doesn't argue and lifts her up so she reaches a thick branch with ease, she continues to climb up to one of the narrow ones and I fear she ie gonna fall for a second. "We're pretty far from the cornucopia, a good deal if you ask me. C'mon, go up!"_

_James hange from the thick branch and stretches up to lift himself. I've never seen my dad this agile or strong._

_"Use your belt to tie yourself to the tree like this" Anika demonstrates. "I've seen in the the 74th games."_

_James chuckles. "I don't think that belt would hold me. But you can sleep now and I'll sleep during the day when you gaurd. Cool?"_

_"Deal" she replies._

_James spends the night alert, looking for any signs of other tributes who could be around._

_I tear my eyes from the television. The night is spead up since nothing exciting was happening. "What happened to her?"_

_I can see dad wiping a tear from his cheek. "You'll see, Jeanie. But remember to take her advices. Anika was a smart one"_

* * *

**Day fifteen**

"Feeling stronger?" I lace up Tate's bag and throw the strap over my shoulder. Ophelia is testing the sword on air before she puts it back in the sheath. 

"Ready to take on Clarisse. If that what you mean" 

I smile and lead with the lantern to the cave I saw back when I was here with Tate and Rainier. The possibility of them still out there, hiding in one of the levels, still surviving.

"Our main goal is to find them" I tell Ophelia, who just shrugs. "So long as we take the cornucopia and possibly kill Clarisse or Jordan, I'm on board." 

We climb up the ladder effectively, I never realized how tall It was, and going first made my stomach twist in a strange way.

 _Ophelia is gonna do something, probably betray you._ Says tribute James. _I saved her, she owes me._ I counter argue with my survival instincts. _there can only be one winner, maybe she wanted you to go first so you can get absolutely wrecked by Clarisse?!._ Tribute James is yelling at me back and still I keep moving up. 

I reach the end only to take a peak. The cornucopia almost seems...deserted. "something isn't right. There's no one there" I whisper to Ophelia. 

"What do you mean? Are these two idiots or are they playing us?" Ophelia replies from bellow me. 

I take a risk and step out into the clearing. Thanks to the sand on the ground I barely make a sound. I sulk close to the shiny edges of the golden cornucopia...

That is when the arrow lodged above my head. 

Jordan jumped from behind a crate, aiming once again for my neck, I duck behind the cornucopia and circle it. Pulling out my sais. 

"Stupid move. I thought a legacy would be smart" Clarisse pops out from in front of me, her spear at the ready. I try to break left from her but she expects it, she uses the spear to knock me off and I crush hard on the ground. 

Clarisse twirls her spear and is ready to drive it through me, I roll to the left and she growls in anger. I manage to pull myself up and slash at her with one of the sais, it merely grazes her but at least it makes her lose her focus for a second.

_Where's Ophelia?!_

Clarisse continues to block my slashes with her spear, she's playing with me, barely sweating as opposite to me, almost out of strength. 

Clarisse knocks one of the sais from my hand

I roll away on my stomach from yet another attempt to stab me when Clarisse chuckles. I manage to pull myself on my elbows when I see why she's laughing:

Ophelia makes a run across the cornucopia's clearing with two packs. Dodging Jordan's arrows. 

_I told you so._ Tribute James' voice sounds bitter and mocking at the same time.

I let out a cry when Clarisse pins me down to the sand with her combat boot. Ready to drive the spear through my back, I see my dad's ghost of a smile. _He's gonna be so disappointed._

A canon fires. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A ahort ep. I know. But I wanted to end it that way.


	16. Day 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean continues to watch her father's games.
> 
> In the arena, Rainier and Tate receive news from a suprising source.

_I watch dad's games fast, refusing to go to aleep as the days in the arena pass pretty fast. Whenever there's a break in the action, we see what the Capitol thinks about my father: Caeser dubs him "a gentle giant" and the public loves his friendship with Anika._

_They can't wait to see how the friendship gets wrecked._

_It's day 9 out of 15, James an Anika have their fair share of sponsers and we're at the final 8: it's dad, Anika and the careers, who split into Pairs by district._

_James and Anika are aware of this, on Night 8 Anika told James "this can't go on for much longer" and he replies. "As soon as two of the careers are dead, we'll split" they took an axe from a dead tribute yesterday, James holds onto it with a white knuckled grip._

_On day 9 the two decide to hike north, there's a cliff overseeing a pink ocean- damn, what is it with the freaking pink this year?!- and they think they can use it to their advantage._

_Little did they know, The district One pair is already camping there, and before they get the chance to turn and run, the One pair already saw them: James had no choice but to jump out of the bushes and swing his axe at the One boy, who blocks it with his mace._

_One girl simply watches, amused, when she notices Anika: The Seven girl is quick on her feet even with a twisted ankle that isn't fully healed yet. She leads the One girl in circles before bolting towards the cliff._

_As One girl charges at her, Anika ducks bellow her and the girl is sent over the cliff. A canon fires as soon she hits the water, that are probably not meant for people to swim in._

_Both James and One boy flinch at the canon, and look to where Anika still stood. "Run!" James yelled at her._

_She hasitates. That is her one mistake._

_The furious one boy throws a knife he had in his boot, it hits her stomach and she takes a few steps back that sends her over the cliff._

_Her canon fires three seconds later._

_James, angry with grief and a taste for revenge, launched at the One boy with newfound strength: he sends the axe right through the boy's face and I close my eyes until I can hear the whistle of the hovercraft._

_My dad now sits at the cliffs edge with a bloody axe, and I can see silent tears rolling down his cheeks._

_At night, the Ones and Anika's pictures show up in the sky, James looks over the cliff again, and throws One boy's mace and the axe into the "ocean" at the bottom._

_He lies awake and I can hear him whispering to himself. "Not again"_

_"It's over" I pause the tv and call out to my dad in the kitchen. "Day nine is over"_

_Four more days pass: the sponsers for James dwindled, but he didn't seem to mind. In the meantime, the Twos got restless and decided to fight eachother already: the girl- Thalia- came up on top and the boy's picture showed up in the sky on day 13._

_There are 3 more tributes left until my dad would be crowned victor: on day 14, Thalia managed to kill the girl from Four and wound the boy. On Night 14, James found the boy. "Please" the boy's voice was not higher than a whisper. His arm was bent in an unnatural way and he was bleeding heavily._

_So dad gave him a mercy kill._

_Day 15 was the big day. Dad and Thalia were pretty much apart, and by the afternoon, a swirl of pink mutts drove the two back to the tree where Dad and Anika camped out for the first few days._

_Dad was unarmed, but was at least a foot taller than Thalia, who narrowed her eyes at him. "How the hell did you survive this long?"_

_James didn't answer, instead he clutched the ring he gave mother and charged at her. Thalia, realizing he isn't much of a talker, readied her two matching swords, but her crushed into her like a bull; she was slammed against the oak tree's big trunk._

_She shook off the hit, even if she was a bit dizzy when she stood back up but she was too late; he grabbed her by her jacket and she kicked the air in order to get free, waving her swords but hitting nothing._

_"I'm sorry" he said quietly, and bashed her as hard as he could against the trunk. There was no blood, but the bump in her temple was enough for me to realize she won't make it long._

_Dad looks away and the canon fired a minute later. along with the trumpets and Claudius Templesnith, the games' legendary commentor. Announced James Trojillio as the victor._

* * *

**Day Sixteen**

**Rainier**

"We really need to find a way out of here" I tell Tate, the 16 in the projector unnerved me. Every day that passes I get nervous. 

"Is it really that bad? We have food, we have sponsers, we can stay here until everyone but Clarisse and Jordan are dead" Tate leans on his back on the sleeping bag we were given. (I'll admit, sharing it might've done well for the audiance. But only fueled my feelings towards him).

"What about Jean?" I glare at him.

"She managed to stay alive until now. She doesn't need us" 

"What about the canon from yesterday?! We missed the anthem because we got distracted!" 

Tate didn't reply for a minute or so. "Maybe you're right. I mean, we can always go back here. Right?" 

I stand up and offer him my hand. "C'mon. I'm sure the wall will open if we push it hard enough".

We rush to the door. It opened for us just when Clarisse and Jordan almost saw us and gave us shelter, all we have to do is figure out how to open it: Tate tries to push and roll the wall to the side.

"I don't think that's working" I cross my arms. 

"Have a better idea?" Tate says with teeth clenched. 

I press the wall repeatedly, waiting to feel a bump that might do the trick. 

My finger lands on a bump close to the left, when I press it, the wall rolls aside and we're back into the dim lights of the pyramid. The wall closes behind Tate and I note that the torch above it is a bit crooked. "Let's take this and trust our instincts to lead us to the basement again" I grab the torch. "We can use this as our mark for the room." Tate agrees. 

We walk in silence, there are only 9 tributes left, but it's still not safe to make noise to alert them. 

A shadow of a person is kneeling next to the glass floor. The holographic 16 is showing us it's a girl, her hair covers her face, falling down in blonde waves. 

Ophelia Sheridan. 

Tate pulls up his sword and she hears it, taking her own sword and holding it in front of her body. "I was so stupid to ditch her" she mutters. "Of course you would go after me if she died" 

"Who died?" Tate barks. 

"I don't know, I fell basically unconscious before the anthem-" in the dim light I could see her lousy bandage work trying to take care of her shoulder, which was bleeding out. 

"Who did you ditch? What happened?" I demand and Tate takes a few steps forward, he could definitely take her out. 

"Jean. We had a short alliance and we wanted to take the cornucopia but I ditched her and now.." Ophelia raises the sword and I take a few steps towards her. "Where is she, was she the canon from yesterday?!" I yell

"I don't know, okay?! All I know is that I am so freaking sorry about what I did. She saved my life and I spat in her face" 

I kneel infront of the glass floor and look through it. The cornucopia is clearly deserted. Meanwhile, Tate attacks:

He lands the first hit with his sword, she barely blocks it, and he manages to disarm her quickly. He holds her by the neck. "If she was the canon from yesterday I swear-" 

"She's right there!" I point to her lying on her stomach, clearly unconscious. 

"Is she dead?" Tate lets Ophelia down and rushes to sit next to me. "She wouldn't be here if she was dead, Come on!" I grab Tate and our bags and bolt to the ladder that leads to the cornucopia's level. Ophelia runs after us. 

I kneel next to Jean, there's a small puncture wound on her back, probably from Clarisse. What stopped her from finishing the job?. 

Jean probably fainted from shock, beacuse her wound didn't seem so bad. I roll her to the side and try to come up with a way to wake her up. I decide to simply let her wake up on her own since I'm not sure what I can do to help, and what if I'd make it worse? 

Ophelia is still standing here, by the landmines. "Go. We spared you, now go" I tell her. 

She begins to protest but stops. As if she realized she lost our trust. She turns on her heels and goes back up the ladder. 

I look around, the cornucopia looks even bigger when it's only us in it. I sigh. "Looks like we own the cornucopia now" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a little parallel to how Thresh killef Clove in the 74th. It was unintentional I swear.


	17. Day 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see how James manages the mentor room for the first five days of the games
> 
> In the arena, Jean wakes up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT  
> I haven't read the ballad of songbirds and snakes yet but I know Snow ia like, 18 by the time of the tenth games. But I'm too lazy to match my fics with canon so...

_There's a difference walking into the mentors room when you know it's your daughter out there, I think._

_The room looks just the same, but how I'll leave it once the games are over will change my entire life. It all depends on the odds, like it usually is_

_Kala pats me on the back. "Let's go find our seats, gentle giant" her warm smile is ever present, a tactic she took from Seeder: always show positivity._

_I bite my nails before I sit and feel the pressure threatening to burst through my chest. Did Cecelia Sanchez feel like this on the 77th and 87th games?- wait, bad example, Cecelia lost both of her tribute daughters._

_The only legacies that made it are the Richson family, and none of them are here now to give me advice- though I doubt the district One family would even spare me a glance._

_The only other legacies I can talk to are Katniss and Prim Everdeen. With all the trauma their familly has been through.. Katniss is sitting right next to me at district Twelve's console. She's in her fifties but keeps going along with Prim, who deals with the sponsors._

_"You seem upset. I don't blame you" she says softly. I've always found myself admiring her courage for what she did for her sister- even if I was barely 4 at the time._

_"How did you cope, when Prim was in there?" I ask._

_"Lets say I wasn't completely sober. Courtesy of Haymitch" she replies, laying back in her chair as the screens came to life._

_"And Rhys?"_

_Katniss' nephew- Prim's son- was a tribute in the last quell. But Matthew Mellark, the nephew of Katniss' legendary district partner, was the victor that year. Yes, it's rude to open up this subject, I'm aware, but I can't help myself from talking._

_Katniss only sighs. "I had to drag Prim to and away from the mentors room, it was a disaster. I won't lie to you. Whe- **if-** Jean ends up dying, You can always find my sister. Let out all your anger and feelings, gentle giant" _

_I can't help but cringe at the name, only Kala calls me that now that Chaff is gone._

_The Capitol seal flashes on the screen and I see Jean rising up in her glass tube. We switched tributes just for this year and I can see Jean already surveying the arena: a golden pyramid._

_The other legacy girl is right next to Jean; and when the gong sounded, she bolts straight ahead as Jean closes on a bag and bolts._

_Good Jeanie! Now go and don't look back!_

_The five boy yanks her backwards but is immediately hit by one of the sister legacy's knives, which misses Jean._

_She bolts into the dark second level and hides near the edges, she opens up her bag as the main feed continues to focus on the bloodshed one floor bellow._

_Jean rests for the day; she doesn't make any sound to confirm anything but I'm sure she is doing okay. Next to me, Katniss sighs as both her tributes are out yet again. "I'm rooting for her" was all she said before leaving, Matthew in tow._

_Rainier is having a pretty eventful day; he almost died in the dangerous basment level he fell into along with the Four boy. But the boy decided to spare his life; now they both were on the main feed, half arguing as their clothes dry nearby._

_"Can you watch him too? I'll go to sleep. Tell me if that career boy changed his mind about keeping Rainier alive" Kala stands up. I nod before returning to the screens._

_In the little hours of the night, when nothing interesting is happening. The whistles and growls of the hidden mutts are nothing but background noise as I fall asleep._

_On day Two Jean barely dodges the district 1 pair. I can't help but sigh in relief as the girl rushes her now blind partner away from where Jean hides._

_On day Three, I can see she has almost no water left and that raises the question of sponsers. "We don't have many" warns Kala. "Not for Jean, anyway" she made frequent stops next to Achilles Demourt's station, since Tate and Rainier continue to be popular._

_"Can't we diverge some of his sponser money to Jean?" I ask, hopeful. "Not without Demourt knowing. I doubt he would have a problem with that, but it doesn't worth trying. You need to get her sponsors of her own" Kala replies, her expression saddened._

_There are a few lining up to be her sponsers, people who believe in the power of a legacy, almost all of them are former clients I had._

_But it's all for Jean, so I bit down the memories and approached Tilia Silverstone and Mimi Herreas. "Ladies" I greeted. They still giggle in the same annoying laugh even Twenty years later. They both wore Silver mixed with golden fabric, and their hair was a disastrous shade of teal. How can someome think it's pretty- I have no idea._

_"James darling, we haven't seen you around in years since the circle was disbanded" purred Tilia._

_"I'm here to make an offer, Mrs Silverstone, Mrs Herreas"_

_"Oh? Do pray tell" Mimi took the liberty to step closer to me, close enough to smell her strawberry perfume. "I'd like for you to consider sponsoring my daughter, I know she hadn't done much in the past three days, but she is cunning, she knows when to make her move and She will come out on top in the end"_

_"Oh, I thought it was a different offer. You're no fun." Mimi pouted. "But I'm willing to bet on your daughter for the next few days. She better give me results. But both Tilia and I **require** something in return for our sponsership." _

_I freeze. "Madame Snow does not allow this kind of payment as for sponsership."_

_Mimi scoffs. "Oh, her? I'm sure she wouldn't mind if both sides were satisfied. You would enjoy our company for your daughter's sake, wouldn't you, **Jamie**?" _

_For Jean's sake and only for her sake. She flashes on the main screen for a second and I can see her expression: she's thirsty, desperate. If I'm not careful, she'll go raid the cornucopia"_

_"Fine" I clench my teeth._

_As I run back to the mentors room I check my tablet. Tilia and Mimi kept their promise. They were now listed as Jeans offical sponsers and the money started flowing in. I can now afford the water._

_"Fuck, tell me what to do!" Jean calls out through the camera she knows there is hidden there._

_I press the send button as fast as I can._

_On day Four she barely moves from her spot, expect one time for "unpacking" herself. She clenches the ring again and I know she's probably thinking about Hailey Summit._

_On day five Jean makes a choice I don't approve, she goes down to the cornucopia. Only Nyx Gearda is there, a stupid choice of the careers, A really stupid choice._

_Jean sneaks closer to the cornucopia before she unknowingly steps in one of the traps. She makes no sound when the three little arrows sink themselves into her thigh above her knee. Only her face show her pain. She's on the main feed, I can hear Elio Blade granting in frustration. "Get up! Do something damn it!"_

_But Nyx only moves when Jean is halfway through the way to the ladder, he chases her blindly and she manages to run back to her corner as Nyx runs into a pissed off Clarisse._

_It's a miracle Clarisse didn't see her, Tilia and Mimi appreciated Jean pulling something off so they sent more money, enough for banadges to send her for her wounds. Jean accepts them with gratitude._

_On day Six she continues to rest, her expression is haunted and sad and I know she's thinking about Hailey. Who was the furthest a district 11 tribute got to in the last 10 years._

_Jean will surpass her. No. I dare to think: Jean would be this year's victor._

* * *

**Day Seventeen**

**Jean**

"-Swear, they are trying to push this past the record for longest games" 

It's a familiar voice talking next to me, why can't I figure out who's talking? 

I'm wrapped in a blanket with a pack below my head as a makeshift pillow. My back no longer hurts that much but my muscles are screaming in pain... 

"What was the longest year, the 74th? And that was like.. 18 days" another voice replies to the voice from earlier, this time I do recognize it. Rainier, my district partner. We're in the hunger games.

I'm still in the hunger games, somehow. 

"Am I...not.. dead?" I ask, my lips are so fucking dry and my voice sounds like glass paper. 

Rainier sits next to me, pulling the first aid kit next to him so he can work on helping me. "No; you're still here. Tate! Get me a water bottle" 

Oh, right.. Tate from district Four has been Rainier's ally from the beginning. 

Tate runs to sit next to me as well, now, with the cornucopia's lights, I can see him clearly: sandy blonde hair, smooth tanned skin, light green eyes and tall frame. 

_Wait wait wait_. I do a double take. _We're_ at _the_ _cornucopia?_

We are. I can see the golden horn towering over all of us. Tate passes me the water bottle and I take small, little sips before I sit up. 

"What happened to Clarisse?" I ask. "And Jordan?" 

"We're not sure" Rainier bites his lips. "We missed the anthem two days ago when someone's canon fired. Either Clarisse is dead or she ran off because of someone." 

"Ophelia is also alive" muses Tate. 

_I told you she'd ditch you._ Says tribute James in my head. I try to shurg my anger away but I can't. "Good for her" I hiss. 

"She wanted to come help us. Tate almost killed her yesterday, but we let her go. She's probably roaming the area alone" Rainier notes. 

"Well.. she's not even worth killing. But thanks for finding me" I manage a smile. 

"Of course, that's what allies are for" Rainier returns a smile. Tate nods, even if he doesn't know me that well. 

"So lets just rest up today. Maybe you and me can get to understand eachother better" says Tate and passes me an apple. 


	18. Day 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We continue to see James in the mentors room. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean tries to get a good look at the tributes still alive.

_On day Seven the district 8 pair stars on the main screen, they found "the oasis" a hidden room on the top floor full of fresh supplies. They give eachother a big kiss._

_On my camera, I see the district Four boy sneaking up the ladder towards Jean who is still asleep. "Wake up; wake up!" Even though she can't hear me, she opens her eyes slowly; before realizing the knife aimed at her throat._

_"Take your stuff and come with me" Tate commands. He leads her to a red square and I pray it's the one I think it is.._

_They both take a dive into the basement and Tate drags her onto shore. "The gamemakers can't change an animal's features. My dad studied the mutts" she argues with Tate and I can't help but smile. She remembers every thing I taught her._

_She's Reunites with Rainier and Kala returns to sit next to me, Achilles Demourt brings a chair to sit between us. Back in the day, Achilles was the most popular amongst the prostitutes Snow kept. But now I can see light in his green eyes, as if he's happier._

_"Nice I get to work with you too" Achilles greets._

_Alliances made the games easier for the mentors who mentor them: with me, Kala and Achilles keeping watch over the trio, Kala got more time to rest, but I simply refused._

_"You need to rest" Achilles turns to me._

_"I'll rest when I know for sure that Jean is safe" she's lying on her back near Rainier's side, as far as she can from Tate. She doesn't trust him enough._

_"You don't trust Tate"_

_"Neither does Jean"_

_Achilles sighs. "You know Tate and Rainier bring the sponsers, check your bank"_

_He was right, Jean joining the popular duo made her jump in the line of odds, and I now had access to the full bank Rainier and Tate had._

_Jean spent day Eight getting to know Tate, and I spent it discussing strategy with Achilles._

_On day Nine, the three decide to be reckless and raid the cornucopia, Achilles and I lock eyes and I know we both are thinking the same thing._

_They are gonna get themselves killed._

_The trio climbs up the ladder and Tate goes up to Valerie and Ophelia, who are just mourning Nyx. (Killed by Angus from district 9, the careers are now suspicious of eachother. I predict the pack will break tonight, maybe tomorrow._

_Tate tries to manipulate and distract the two girls while Jean and Rainier take several goods from the cornucopia's mouth. Tate and Ophelia's argument escalates into a fight, Achilles is sure enough of Tate's abilities- Tate scored a perfect Twelve along with Clarisse, who is out hunting with Jordan, while Ophelia scored a 10._

_Rainier and Jean listen to the fight, somehow, Ophelia manages to send a blow using her spear, Tate was on the floor, granting in pain and Achilles swore under his breath. Ophelia went for a killing blow when Jean charged out of nowhere and knocked Ophelia and Valerie to the ground._

_Well, not to the ground, my camera drops down and I realize they entered the basement. Jean and Ophelia hit the water hard- Valerie is less fortunate and hits the solid rocks._

_In the pitch black darkness I can sew Jean struggle to stay afloat. I grab the console hard. "You can do it Jean; follow the hovercraft!"_

_As if she heard me, she follows the hovercraft picking up Valerie's body and she collapses on the rocks. On the main feed; Rainier drags Tate into a hidden room, stitching him up with the equipment he found in the cornucopia's mouth. Unawere of the mutt about to be awakened._

_Both Kala and Achilles gasp in suprise as Rainier charges and kills the mutt, even I raise an eyebrow in respect before I turn back to my camera._

_Both Jean and I stay awake through night 9, non of us can sleep now since we both know Ophelia is out there in the basment level. By the morning, I can barely hold my eyelids open, so I drift off to sleep._

_"Excuse me, Mr Trojillio.." someone jerks me awake and I curse myself for falling asleep. What happened?! I quickly grab the console and fix my earphones. Jean is sitting with a blanket on the rocks and nibbling on an apple, next to her sits a girl with wet blonde hair, also wrapped in a blanket._

_Ophelia._

_I squint my eyes as if to see if I'm seeing right: Jean teamed up with Ophelia?_

_"Mr Trojillio, may I sit here?" I didn't even notice the young woman standing to my left; Kala sits in Atalanta's seat next to Achilles, they both are watching their screens and the main feed- that shows Clarisse and Jordan are fighting a scorpion mutt sent their way._

_I recognize the young woman as Alexa Elle Sheridan. Resident mentor for district 1 and Ophelia's older sister._

_"Sure. Have a seat"_

_Alexa Elle picks up the headphones. "She saved my sister you know. If your daughter hadn't turn to help her, Ophelia would've drowned"_

_I smile to myself at Jean's kindness, I've always taught her to be kind..._

_But in these games there is no place for kindness._

* * *

**Day Eighteen**

**Jean**

I'm still not used to having the cornucopia. 

This morning, when I woke up to see the golden horn above me, I immediately rolled over and pulled my sais, thinking I am held captive in career territory. 

"It's so weird staying here" Rainier mutters. "This is the furthest any of the district 11 tributes got ever since my dad" I concur. 

"Well, non of the games lasted over 15 days so.. that's something" says Tate. "I guess I should be used to the cornucopia since we Fours almost always camp here, but it feels weird after the basment and that room" 

"What room?" 

"Oh. When Tate and I were hiding from the careers after you fell to the basement, we found a hidden room with a mutt inside" 

I think about the pyramid we stand in, it's obvious it'll have hidden rooms but... "do you think there are more rooms like that one?" I ask. 

"Maybe. Maybe on each level" Tate shrugs. 

"But we have this cornucopia all for ourselves! Let's not give up on it, Ophelia and whoever it is from Two won't claim it" adds Rainier. 

"Speaking of which. Who is still alive?" I try to run though all the tributes who appeared in the sky. 

"There's Ophelia, and definitely one from district 2, since Clarisse never finished the job on you" Rainier draws in the sand with his finger. 

"Do you really think the canon two days ago was for her?" I ask. "I doubt it. She scored a Twelve in training for a reason. There is no ouliar fighter that can take her down easily" replies Tate.

"So that means the canon was for Jordan? He was there too. Chasing Ophelia away" I cringe. Just thinking about that moment makes me mad. 

"Could be. We need to figure out the others, we're at the final 8 now" 

Rainier draws a big triangle in the send and divides it into four parts. "We're at the second level, the bottom one being the basment." He draws another the number 1 on the section above them. "That is Ophelia. We know for sure she's alive." 

"There's the district 9 guy. He scored pretty high and I don't remember seeing him in the sky" Tate took the stick and drew the number 9 on Ophelia's level. 

"And someone from district 2 for sure" I add a 2 in one of the sections. 

But who are those other three? I have no idea. I remember not seeing the number 8 in the sky at all, or maybe it was on the first night? No, no, I'm pretty sure they are both still alive. "The Eights are still around. Both of them" I draw the number 8 twice somewhere in the triangle. 

Who is the last one? Is there even a last one? I guess we'll see. 

We spend the day getting a lesson in self defense from Tate, his tips are pretty useful, and I'd like to not be speared through the back anytime soon, the hole between my shoulders still aches from what Clarisse tried to do three days ago. 

The seal shows no one again. I guess the tributes are more adapt to surviving in this arena. 

I have a feeling The games this year are gonna be long and hard to beat; but I'll still try. 


	19. Day 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James reflects on days 11-17
> 
> In the arena, someone dares to Attack the cornucopia.

_I have my suspicions about this new alliance between Jean and Ophelia. But there's no way I'll tell them to Alexa Elle. Not since the numbers for Jean has gone up over the past three days. On day Fourteen, I notice they are on their last bits of food, and just by pressing a couple of buttons, Alexa Elle and I gather a nice dinner and even a new sword for Ophelia._

_Jean managed to convince Ophelia to eat; I tried to talk with Alexa-Elle about the whole starving on purpose deal, but she was way more defensive about it and avoided my questions perfectly. "Just know you can talk to me if you'd like" I told her before giving up on the subject. "I have Matthew. But I'll keep your advice too, Mr Trojillio"_

_Not many victors call me that, we all adopted either first or last_ _name basis even if we didn't really know eachother, it was just easier that way._

_But Alexa Elle calls every victor "Mr or Miss" apparently. earlier in the games I heard her calling Carmen "Miss De Silva" and Carmen was honestly horrified._

_Jean and Ophelia decide to raid the cornucopia again, why? I cannot, for the life of me, Imagine what is going on inside Jean's brain: The cornucopia isn't that important! It's not your territory to meddle with._

_"You should rest" Alexa-Elle sits back down next to me, holding a cup of black coffee. "It's gonna be a long night and who knows how are you gonna do tomorrow"_

_I don't like sleeping, I like working myself out doing something until I can't keep my eyes open anymore. That way, my body is almost too tired to even conjour the regular nightmares, the memories that haunt the back of my mind still float, but It's like I see someone else in them, and they don't hit the same way If I'm exhausted._

_"Swear you'll wake me up if anything -even mildly important- happens" I warn. Alexa-Elle simply nods and goes back to her coffe. I go lay on_ _the couch on the break room, but I can hear Mae Steele and Tal Hughes, the district 8 mentors, arguing even from here._

" _I'm gonna send that note to Leslie and you can't stop_ _me" Mae says stubbornly. "Why? What good is gonna come from them splitting up?!" Tal replies._

_"That way they wouldn't have to face eachother in the finale. And it will make it harder for Angus to catch them"_

_I hold at that peace of information, stepping back into the mentors room. "What is going on with Angus?" I ask. Mae simply narrows her eyes at Nina Fitzgerald sitting next to Tal and whispers to me: "He is dangerous, killed the scorpion mutt in his hidden room and now he uses the venom on darts and on his knife. Keep your daughter as far away as you could from him"_

_she turns to narrow her eyes at me this time: "although I'm not sure if your daughter knows what danger she got herself into, since she allied with a career"_

_I take a quick glance at Alexa-Elle near my table, the main feed shows Clarisse and Jordan in the cornucopia, talking about victory._

_"I don't approve of her actions, but so far Ophelia proved herself as trustful"_

_"Just wait till tomorrow, I can guarantee you that career girl is gonna do something that will get your daughter killed."_

_After a warning like this, I could barely catch an hour or two of sleep, I send Alexa-Elle to sleep at the early hours of the morning- Jean and Ophelia are still asleep- and I settle for what is probably gonna be the most stressful day of my life: even more stressful than my own games._

**_"You thought your arena was painful until you found yourself watching your own child stepping into the ga_ ** **_mes"_ ** _Cecelia Sanchez said this in her offical statement after her youngest daughter, Natalie, died in the games the year before I got reaped._

_She was definitely right._

_The day starts and the girls slowly climb up the ladder, Jean goes first, the cornucopia looks deserted enough but I saw the Two's staying there earlier. Oh fuck.._

_Jean reaches the cornucopia when an arrow hits right above her head._

_She does the smart thing and runs, circles the cornucopia to escape Jordan, who stopped shooting arrows. Why did he stop?_

_I feel my nails digging bloody gaps into my palm when I realize why, Clarisse is waiting right on the other corner, she uses her spear to knock Jean off her feet._

_This is a trap, of course its a trap. And where the hell is Ophelia?_

_Clarisse tries to land a killing blow on Jean, who rolls on her stomach, away from where the spear was supposed to hit. But she doesn't get to stand up as Clarisse holds her down with her boot and laughs at something._

_On the main screen, the camera shows from Jean's POV Ophelia running off with a few bags with Jordan giving chase. She dosen't even stop to help._

_Mae Steele's warning echoes in my mind. I send a pleading look towards her but she shakes her head in pity. As if she's saying "I told you so"_

_Clarisse is ready to drive the spear through Jean's back, the sharp tip already piercing through hee skin._

_A canon fires, and Jean lies unmoving._

_As if some painful irony, Alexa-Elle enters on this very second. "What did I miss?"_

_I am driven only by my rage, before she can even reach anything to use as a weapon my hand closes over her neck as I push her against a wall. She doesn't weigh much._

_All the remaining mentors look up: Nero holds Carmen back, Mae takes a few steps towards me and Kala sends me an alarming look. "James..."_

_"My daughter is **dead.** and all because of **your** sister!" I hiss at Alexa-Elle, whos hands close on mine trying to break free from my grasp. _

_If I close my eyes for a second I can see myself in the arena again: killing Kovthe from One for what he did to Anika, and isn't this the exact way I held Thalia from Two before I killed her?_

_"Look at the main screen, Trojillio! That canon wasn't for Jean" Nero jerks me away from the memories. He is still holding Carmen back, she only has a fork in her hand but I can guarantee she can kill me with it with no problem._

_I do as he commends, Ophelia is long gone. Clarisse is now running up the ladder chasing after Angus, the boy from Nine- where the hell did he came from?!- the hovercraft is there, but it doesn't pick up Jean._

_It picks up Jordan, who has a dart smeered with yellow stuck behind his neck._

_I let Alexa-Elle go and rush to the screen. The line that shows me her life index, if the line reaches zero, your tribute is down. Jean's index is at 52%, which is not great, but she isn't in immediate danger._

_Damn, I feel like a total idiot right now._

_I spend the rest of day 15 overseeing Jean's life index, it doesn't go up or down at this moment, and non of the other mentors is talking to me- not even Kala- I'm not suprised. The cornucopia stays deserted all night, Ophelia isn't coming closer to it, and Clarisse is busy sneaking away on the highest level, daring Angus to come out and fight her._

_On day 16, Rainier and Tate hear about the possibility that Jean is dead, in some weird irony, Tate grabs Ophelia the same way I grabbed Alexa-Elle but is stopped by Rainier, who calls out. "She's there!"_

_The boys rush downstairs and Rainier begins doing his medical work, taking care of Jean's wound and bringing her health status to 67%._

_Ophelia, suprisingly, runs after them, and the guilt is seen on her face as she runs back to the first level in shame._

_On day 17, I couldn't be more happier to see my girl awake._

* * *

**Day Nineteen**

**Jean**

"Eight tributes left and as of tomorrow, we'll break a record: longest games in history" declares Tate. 

"You keep saying that" Rainier sighs. 

"It is a big deal, I don't know why the gamemakers insist on keeping this year longer, are we that interesting?" Tate's head is in Rainier's lap, who is playing with Tate's hair playfully. I haven't seen them in a while, but I can see their fake relationship has developed, and by the looks they are exchanging, I'm not so entirely sure it's that fake anymore. 

_Romance angles always fail._ Says Tribute James in my head. _so are alliances, the Capitolites are invested in those because they want to see how they break._

"How long are we gonna do this? How long will we continue with this alliance?" I can't stop myself from asking. 

Both Tate and Rainier fall slient at ny question, clearly they haven't thought about it in those days they were alone. 

"I guess.. we can wait until there are only three more tributes, than we'll split" suggests Rainier. "Who knows how long is that gonna take?" I reply. 

"C'mon, the crowd loves us, don't they?" Tate stands up. He draws his sword. "I heard something" 

Rainier and I jump up, I pull out the sais. "Clarisse?" 

"Not sure" 

"Could be Ophelia" Rainier suggests quietly. I shudder at the mention of her name. How could I trust her, I don't know. I lock eyes with Tate and he nods silently: he won't betray me, or Rainier. If we die, it won't be by his hands. 

"What are you suggesting we do if it is her?" Tate is still gripping his sword with a tight knuckled grip. "I don't know" I sigh. "I guess we should do nothing unless she's attacking us" 

And then the dart misses Tate in a matter of inches. A boy lets out a battle cry and charges at us with a mace. 

"Get inside!" Tate directs us to the cornucopia's mouth, there are still unopened crates we didn't bother to check whats inside and we dive behind them for cover. I regret not choosing a bow as my weapon, would've been way more helpful now would it?

Just soon enough a strong smell hits me, I put a hand over my nose. Tate is no where to be seen, probably went to fend off our attacker. Rainier's dark eyes meets mine 

"Gasoline" he whispers. We scram just in time to see another boy lighting a match and the crate caught fire. 

I pull up my sais and charge at him, knocking him down: It's Angus, the boy from Nine We remembered yesterday. He reaches for the dart gun- the one he almost hit Tate with- and manages to pull up one dart in his hand, I aim one of the sais to his throat but he grabs it with his free hand- unbothered by the blood dripping from his palm. The red looked scary on the boy's ghostly pale skin 

He pushes the little sword towards me: he has enough momentom to knock it out of my hand and in turn, knock me down so he's the one pinning me down with his knees.

I don't see Rainier and Tate is fighting the boy from Six near the edge of the landmine circle, close to where the red sqaure that leads to the basement is. 

Angus pushes the dart closer to my neck, I can see yellow smeared over the tip. _It's poision, dumbass! Do something! Tate and Raineir are a little busy at the moment!._ Tribute James, the survivalist in me, yells. 

Someone grabs Angus by his jacket from behind, I expect to see Tate's tall frame but instead I see a girl, her face stained with blood, her blue eyes fierce with determination: 

Ophelia. 

Angus sends his fist towards her face but she grabs his wrist with her hand, Angus raises the hand holding the dart close to her..

"Watch it!" I yell out. Ophelia is quick enough to avoid getting the dart in her neck. But before she can stabilize herself Angus ducks below her and stabs the dart into her side before sprinting away, I can see Rainier give chase. 

Ophelia immediately takes out the dart and we lock eyes. "Thank you" I tell her. 

In response, she drops to her knees. "I think... I think the poison is already....affecting..." Ophelia's breath is heavy. And I catch her before she drops to the floor completely. 

"Im...sorry.. for ditching you Jean.. you are a good person. Better..than me" she mutters, I lift up her shirt a little, golden liquid starts covering her veins. Probably not a good sign.

"At least we're even" I manage a sad smile. "I saved you. You saved me" 

Rainier drops by my side. "I couldn't catch him, I'm sorry" 

"One of you.. needs to win" Ophelia's voice was no higher than a whisper. "You outliars are just- just good at- at surviving. I hope...you win" 

She lets out one last heavy gasp before the canon fires.

Rainier and I move to let the hovercraft take the body away and I drink a full bottle of water. My throat is dry, and I feel so numb inside I might not stand up from this crate. 

_She sacrificed her life for me. Why?._

_Because she's right. You deserve to win._ this time, tribute James doesn't sound angry, or determined or cynical, this time he sounds like the dad that raised me, the boy who cared for a 13 year old girl in a game where only the strong survive.

_You outliars are just good at surviving._

Damn right we are. 


	20. Day 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean dreams about uprisings.
> 
> In the arena, she tells Tate stories from home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter in salute to the Black lives matter movement and the protests around the US. Stay strong! I may not be American, but I'll do what I can to help you! Let's change the world for the better like Katniss did.

In _my dream, I was far away from here. From the arena, even from Panem itself- at least I think._

_The square was big, bigger than the square where our reaping is held. And it had grass and water fountains and building surrounding it. People around me were kneeling, dark and light skinned people knelt in slience with their fist raised in the air. They were clearly protesting: their faces covered and a look of determination in their eyes. The silence was absolute; I could only hear the wind whistling around the protestors, occasionally catching onto their clothes or mask covers._

_"No justice!" A woman chanted to a megaphone. "No peace!" The crowd stood up and answered. "No justice!" The woman yelled louder. "No peace!" The crowd yelled back._

_At the front I could see a line of men standing with black and blue gear, bulletproof vests, and rifles._

_I grew up in district 11. I can recognize peacekeepers, even if they are dressed differently._

_I didn't know what they were protesting, but the power of their silence made my heart melt: solidarity, unity against something. Why can't we do it back home as well?_

_I raised my fist with them. even if they might not actually see me._

_My dream changed, it was another protest, all those people of all colors, but this protest wasn't silent, it was loud: people were chanting, carrying sighs ans waving it in front of the line of peacekeepers, still dressed in black and blue. A car stopped in the back, and a middle aged man, around head peacekeeper Teerence's age, stepped out. He was carrying a weapon I've seen at least twice in the arena._

_A bow and arrow._

_"Don't you dare!" A woman yelled behind me, holding up something that I assume is recording- clearly, she isn't recording me. "This is his car" she told the filming device, probably. A line of peacekeepers moved towards the protestors, who yelled at them in return. One man pulled up a spray bottle that hit one of the protesters right in the eyes. She cried out in pain while the yelling got stronger, as people went out to protect her. "This is what they do!" Some girl yelled to a recording device. "They stir us up and make these protests into riots. They then put it all on us!"_

_But I never got to see the end of it, my scenery changed yet again: this time it was oh so familiar: the towering building of shipment boxes, the grey of the justice building, the huge screen for mandatory hours._

_I was back home in Eleven_

_But the people standing there weren't watching my game: no, the arena was a beautiful green forest, with a meadow filled with flowers in all colors. And a girl around my age was aranging the flowers around a little girl- probably one of the 12 year olds- lying with her eyes closed, as if she's sleeping._

_But people don't just sleep like that in the moddle of the games, that little girl is dead._

_The older girl stands up, she raises three fingers to her mouth and to the air, I know this move: it's district 12's way of saluting._

_Only when the people of Eleven salute her back I realize who the older girl is: Katniss Everdeen, who sparked the only time our district tried to riot against the Capitol before people got gunned down, including my own grandfather._

_Mandatory hours are abruptly over as the screen goes black and I know what is gonna happen next._

_The people yell out, some attack the oncoming peacekeepers while some werck the shit out of every shipment box they can find, all this food meant for the Capitol wasted._

_I can't help but smile- it's not like they can hurt me._

_But I know how the story ended: the year Katniss won and on her victory tour people were on edge. But she wasn't as inspiring as she was in the arena, she was broken and brought before the people of Eleven to see that there's no one to rally behind. Katniss was a broken 16 year old and grew up to be a broken 50 year old along with her sister- at least that's what dad sees._

_The riots have defeated the people who remained and the work became harder for the next ten- fourteen years._

_It's only after my dad won the games those punishments really stopped._

_I look away when the shootings begin. The tears are breaking out again and I can't hold them anymore. I drop to the floor as people and peacekeepers run by me, shouting, fighting._

_I feel my blood boiling with rage. It never stopped didn't it? Like the woman said:_

_No justice, no peace._

_I will step out of this arena. And I will see a free panem rising._

* * *

**Day Twenty**

I wake up with a throbbing head. 

According to our watch duty turns, Rainier was on watch last, he stared at the huge 20 above us, close to the burned crate at the cornucopia. 

Oh, right. Angus tried to burn it. 

"Go to sleep, Tate and I can manage" I tell Rainier. He doesn't argue and goes to the sleeping bag with no complains. 

"You look determined. If looks could kill, we'd all be dead and you'd be wearing the crown, what are you thinking about?" Tate leans his chin on his palm. 

I pull him aside and tell him about my dreams as Rainier sleeps peacefully next to us. 

He looks over to the glass roof, where the number 20 shone brightly. We set a new record, and the games aren't ending anytime soon. "I don't think it's safe to talk like that here"

"You asked" 

He sighs in agreement. "I asked." 

"Is it that bad?" He asks quietly. "Back in your home?" 

"We have it bad. But I am not an example. I am a Victor's child. I go to school with the 1% elite of light skinned people and those who can afford education instead of work. It doesn't mean those white folk want me there" 

I think about all the hushed conversations I heard. Ghostly pale rich Girls wishing they were born in another district, how they are the minority despite being the elite. 

Tate nods. "In Western Port there are dark skinned people like you. The people from Main city pick on them endlessly. Almost non of them finish the program. Its just sad" 

"People like me- well, like Rainier, actually- they get punished even if they didn't do the crime. One time my friend Hailey's brother was walking home from the plantations with all the other kids. A boy reached for the night goggles they give us for work to give them to the peacekeeper. Who thought he held a gun and shot him, just like that" 

Tate's eyes widened. "Were they punished?" 

"No. Not a word from his superiors once he claimed he thought it was a gun" 

"But that's- in Four peacekeepers get fired for using tazers and in Eleven- that is not okay!" The cameras might've heard His little outbreak, I put a finger to my lips. 

"You know. I think the people in my dreams were fighting for the same cause" 

He stared at me confused. "Do you think they also had to send two kids of their community to fight in a tournament of life and death?" 

"No. But I've seen a lot of dark skinned people like me. Maybe that had to do with it." 

"That isn't comforting to know nothing changed- if you think you dreamed about riots from the age before Panem" Tate warns.

"You didn't feel the solidarity in the air. The way they all stood there in silence. It gave me hope.. for the future" I reply. 

Assuming I make it out alive. For that both Rainier and Tate have to die. I look towards my sleeping district partner. He looked so peaceful sleeping like that, If I didn't win. I count on him to help my dad spark another thing. 

Before I went to sleep I spent my watch duty fantasizing about killing Elenia Snow and Devon Rumpe the head gamemaker. I know, not healthy for a 17 year old girl to fantasize about, but I needed a distraction after Ophelia's death. Her last words still echo in my mind. 

_You outliars are so good at surviving, I hope at least one of you win._

I think about the woman and the chanting crowd: No justice, No peace. 

I repeat it to myself like a mantra. It has a ring to it that I like. Even later at night when the seal of the Capitol shows no deaths. 

No justice, no peace. 


	21. Day 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Alexa Elle tak about Ophelia's death. 
> 
> Jean wonders about Romance. Rainier wonders yet again what will become from his relationship with Tate.

**_Day 19:_ **

_Kala and Achilles rejoined me. They still aren't talking to me but....understandable._

_I watch with trembling hands as Angus gets on top of Jean, aiming one of his arrows at her neck. Please, please, if there is someone up there, let her be safe just for once._

_Suddenly, soneone pushed Angus off of Jean and I hold my breath: Ophelia. Ophelia came to save Jean._

_Despite her wounded shoulder, Ophelia still shakes the boy, but he ducks and loosely stabs her with the arrow, she immediately takes it out._

_And drops to the her knees. Jean catches her before she drops to the floor completely, Jean cradles Ophelia's head in her lap. A little drop was all the poison needed to kill._

_"..I hope..you win.." Ophelia whispers before the canon fires and her body goes limp._

_As Jean walks over to the nearest crate she sits down with her hand in her hands and I feel my heart break inside. If only I could hug her again through the damn screen. Rainier takes care of Tate's light wounds._

_"The six boy stepped in the red area that leads to the basement. For all we know, he is still alive" Tate says._

_The hours slowly pass, Jean doesn't move from her corner and continues to stare on as the seal in the sky shows Ophelia's face._

_"I am so sorry baby. That I can't be there for you" I murmur. Kala has gone to sleep and Medea Vaughn came to replace Achilles. "If Tate doesn't make it... I hope she wins too. You and your district deserve it" she leans back._

_The light from the screens reflects in her eyes and I remember she is only 20 years old. Jean is now the same age Medea was when she won. "Tate seems like a good guy." Is all I say._

_Over the past ten days I followed him and Rainier on the main screen, those tender moments the two shared, bonding between our districts.. these are the moments that make me believe we could rebel one day, soon._

_We just need more people like Tate._

_Night slowly comes and Jean volunteers to take first watch, she stays silent and unmoving throughout the two and a half hours she watches and I wonder what is going on in her mind. when she starts feeling tired and the 19 shifted into a 20, Jean walks up to Tate and nodges him a bit. "Your turn" she says quietly. Her voice is monotonous._

_Medea sits up tight in her chair. "Go to sleep too, James. I'll keep watch and send someone to call you if anything happens."_

_I reluctantly agree, I've been tiring myself for almost three weeks now, my exhausting method would work perfectly if I go to sleep now._

_So I do, and when I wake up the sun was halfway though setting outside, I walk back to the mentors room, but something in the break room causes me to stop in my tracks:_

_Matthew Mellark was sitting on the sofa in the corner, he was holding Alexa-Elle close as he gently rubbed her back. Two different victors from the two edges of Panem, sharing a moment of solidarity and comfort._

_I'd never thought I'd ever see a thing like that._

_I felt horrible interrupting this moment, specifically because Ophelia died saving my own daughter, so I tried to sneak past them without being noticed._

_"James" Alexa-Elle broke free from Matthew's hug- I notice it was the first time she called me by my first name- I turn around hastily. "I'd like to talk with you for a minute, may I?"_

_"Are you sure-" Matthew began asking but she cut him off. "It's okay, Matt. I have to have this talk with him or I'll stay bitter my entire life and I'd like to stay in good relations with the other victors"_

_Matthew simply nodded and walked out. Alexa invited me to sit next to her. "What you have with Matthew is special, are you two..?"_

_Alexa Elle let out a soft chuckle. "No, it's nothing like that, you remember he likes boys, right?"_

_To be honest, I didn't. But now when she brought it up, I remember him with Rhys Everdeen in the quell. And I really believe it was real._

_"So you two are friends then. That is still special, a victor from district 1 and a victor from district 12, it's amazing you found something to bond over" I muse._

_"We're both victors, you know what it's like; and we both were the victors the year Elenia became president. You still remember Coriolanus"_

_It's a bit ironic we call him by his first name, since he and his granddaughter share a last one._

_"Can't say I had good feelings towards the old man" I chuckle._

_We sit again in silence for a minute._

_"I still remember coming to your district at my tour. Jean was so young and I was mesmerized by her look and innocence.. who would've thought.." she wiped her cheek._

_"I'm sorry.." I begin. "Don't, it's how the games work, and Ophelia wanted to pay back the favor she owed Jean, there can only be one victor"_

_Yes. There can only be one. "I heard what Ophelia told Jean before she died. You outliars are just good at survival.. I hope Jean or Rainier win. Eleven deserves it"_

_"Thank you. I'm glad there are no hard feelings." I present my hand to shake. "Come find me after...whatever fate is in store for Jean" she shakes it._

_I make my way into the main mentors room, Medea walks out, bloodshot eyes and a wicked grin on her face. "I stayed to watch during day 20, your daughter wasn't on the main feed for the whole day but I heard her little talk with Tate."_

_I don't know why she looked so uplifted, but I move past her, Kala is back and I take my seat next to her. "Night 20, no deaths today" she informs._

_I sigh, three weeks have past, I need to brace myself for week four, and however many weeks that will follow._

* * *

**Day Twenty One**

**Jean**

"so what is our next move?" Asks Rainier on our breakfast: apples and dried ham. The cornucopia's supplies are starting to run low. 

"I just _know_ they are planning a feast soon" replies Tate, despite having five sleeping bags in the cornucopia, the two still insisted on sharing one- I am convinced it's not about the sponsers anymore, they just enjoy eachother's company. 

I would've never been able to pull a romance angle off. 

Romance was a topic me and my dad talked about a lot in the past two years: he would obviously hint that many girls from school already have boyfriends and guys courting them over, that they have plans for after they age out of the reaping. 

I never made plans for after the reaping because I just knew I would be reaped _someday._ Hailey saved me once when I was 14; but the Capitol would've never given up on me. Thankfully mom and dad decided I was enough, don't need to condemn no other children with a one way ticket to the games. 

So you could say I purposely distanced myself from boys- and there were boys who tried, desperate poor and even rich boys want to be the lucky one to have James Trojillio as a father in law. I just knew I couldn't lead a boy on knowing I would definitely be reaped. 

And I never fell in love with anyone yet. Not even from afar. Maybe there is something wrong with me, finding boys (and girls) hot, wanting to kiss them, but nothing more. 

Maybe I need to find that specific one, but I know for sure I won't find them in the arena. 

**Rainier**

The days are pretty long when you don't have lots of things to do. But we managed, we talked, we ate, we did a mental countdown of who is still alive, there are still 8 of us. 

"Are you sure people are still watching?" Jean jokes.

In some weird irony; we got two parachutes as a response, one had a note attached from a little girl named Adelaide, she said Jean is her favorite and that she loves me and Tate together and hope we'll make it to the finale. 

Does...does she know what will happen if the three of us make it to the finale?

Anyways, her parents sponsered us a pot of cooked rice with beef. Lets say dinner was cheerful as we thanked endlessly for the girl and her parents. 

"C'mon, Jean goes first on watch duty" Tate takes my arm and plants a kiss on my forehead. I told him there are multiple sleeping bags here, but he whispered back and says we can't break the show now. 

I get into the sleeping bag with Tate lying, his chest pressed to my back. His hand intertwined with mine. 

"Look, it's Like a Zebra" Tate laughed softly at the obvious difference between my dark skin and his light tan- now, after not seeing the sun constantly above him for three weeks, the tan started to slowly fade. 

"You hand is warm" I press on his hand tighter. 

He leans his chin on my collarbone and plant soft kisses from my cheek to my neck. "Do you love me?" I ask. It's the first time we brought up the four letter word; I never said it to anyone who wasn't Yake, or mom. 

Funny, I never thought I'd say it to any girl once I aged out, I never liked any of them (now I know why). But it's almost clear to me I'd ask this of Tate, the audience "ships" us. According to Adelaide, our little sponser, They like us together and want to see one of us breaking the L word finally. 

Or maybe because its Tate...

Maybe I truly fell in love with him. 

Do you love me... I desperately wanted him to say yes, even if it's for the show, for the Capitol. It's obviously gonna be his answer, but even a false promise would be enough to send my feelings towards him through the roof.

There, I said it, I'm in love with Tate Haybrook. I'm _in love_ with this career who almost killed me yet saved me on that basment, and then saved me again facing Ophelia and Valerie, and again with Angus two days ago. Who I saved too. 

I'm _in love_ with this boy, who I would've loved to meet at a different situation, in a lifetime where there is no game, there is no one victor, where I won't have to see him die in order to live. 

Would he even notice me if we hadn't met here? I already asked myself that question over a week ago, but now, after Ophelia died and Jean with us again.. the look on Tate's eyes when I went chasing after Angus, he was truly worried for me. And he truly understands Jean after yesterday.. (I have no idea what they talked about, but today they were completely honest and comfortable with eachother) 

"I do" 

I was so into my own mind I didn't hear the fact Tate answered.

"W-what?" 

Tate chuckled, and planted a big kiss on my cheek. "I love you, Rainier" 

"Oh.." I have no words to reply.

Tate chuckles again, he makes his way so he is really close to my ear. "Really, I think I do" he whispers. 

The weight inside my heart drops and melts. He loves me back, he loves me back!

But Now that I know what I know. How can we even go on? What will happen if It's down to us?

"Hey, you two lovebirds. Shut up and go to sleep already!" Jean calls out not from afar. She then chuckles.

There's also Jean, what is she too me, a friend? Definitely. We both know what it's like to grow up under the peacekeepers watchful eye, even if she lives in luxury as my family was barely getting by. It's just something in being labeled as an outliar that brings all of us together.

I have to split soon, otherwise I won't be able to go on. 


	22. Day 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James takes a break from the mentors room with his friend Grover and Katniss. 
> 
> In the arena, a feast is announced, and Jean goes to scouting for the Eight pair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't knoe how many reached this point in the story but I'd love it you'd show a sign if you did! Comment something. TY💕

_"James, take a break"_

_It's about 9 am on a Sunday here, and probably in the arena too. Kala is back after a good night's sleep._

_"I slept here last night, so don't say I need sleep" I say, still not taking my eyes off the screen._

_Kala sighs and pulls me away so I can look at her. Time has taken its toll on her already: little wrinkles are visible around her eyes and there are multiple gray streaks in her hair (but now that I think about it, she had some even in her 40's. Hell, I'm only 40 and have them. Mostly from stress, I suppose)_

_"I'm not asking you to sleep, I'm asking you to go outside to the city, maybe have some coffee and actual food, not the junk from the break room. It'll do you good" her eyes are filled with worry, especially under the florescent lights._

_"No, I can't leave her. I know there's a feast coming and-"_

_"James" Kala stops me. "Even if there is gonna be a feast announced. The feast itself will begin Tomorrow. Today is going to be another "slow" day"_

_Achilles joined us again today, he nods in approval. "Even the career mentors take breaks every once in a while. You can trust us to keep Jean safe and send someone to call you if needed"_

_Even Mae Steele gives me a reassuring look. I've been spending the last 22 days in here and the break room non stop. "I've clearly been outnumbered. I guess I can go find Grover and have breakfast" I chuckle._

_The few remaining mentors move to make way for me to walk to the exit. Before I leave, Mae calls after me: "Lee is at the district 5 compound". We consider him a mutual friend, and I'm glad for that._

_There are two victors named Grover, from two different districts. So everyone in Panem have resorted to use last name basis when talking about them._

_Lee, from district 5 is the older victor, won the 85th games and was there for me along with Kala after I stepped out of the arena, pretty shy yet extra kind to those he knows, and you should see him drunk._

_"If I have to drag you to some coffee shop in order to get you away from that damned room. I will" Lee laughs when I tell him my proposition._

_We decide to go to Elias'. Mainly because The coffee shop also functions as a bar. "The best part? It only shows the games at night. So you won't have to think about them when you drink." Lee finds us seats close to the bar and orders a bottle of scotch. "Can't go wrong with scotch. Can you?"_

_I don't drink much, my time in the village with Chaff and me marrying Morya almost right away helped my body to not turn into unhealthy coping mechanisms like drinking. (Although Kala would argue that my exhaustion method is unhealthy as well)_

_"Finally someone managed to drag you awat from the consoles" a woman chuckles from three stools to my right. Her storm gray eyes shining in the sunlight. "Katniss" I greet. "I guess I remembered what you told me about your doings during Prim's games"_

_Katniss eyes furrowed, breaking her poker face mask she always wears. "I wasn't drunk all the time. Just a few drops at the beginning. And Haymitch had to drag me away too some time. We went here"_

_Her mentor died of liver failure according to the Capitol, after the last quell. But Chaff knew better, I remember he said something along the lines of: "Haymitch lived big and died in his own way. I knew his death was his decision, dying of old age just isn't like him"_

_"I'm sorry about him" I manage to say before emptying my glass. The alchohol burns down like fire down my throat and I shut my eyes tight before opening them back to look at Lee._

_"Well, feels good to not look at a screen and feel the sun on your face?"_

_I pour more scotch into my glass. "It's... Stressing. I haven't thought about Jean or what is going on for the past hour."_

_"It helps to leave the room every once in a while" Katniss comments. "Just thought you should know"_

_"I'll let you go back to the mentors room after you finish this bottle, go sleep the drunkness off, and THEN I'd let you go back, deal?"_

_I down the glass in one go. "Hell yeah"_

* * *

**Day Twenty Two**

**Jean**

The cornucopia is offically out of food.

We look inside the crates for a while, looking for whatever we can find that is fresh, but there are only camping equipment and weapons hidden. 

Luckly we have sponsers to take care of us, they send us a fine breakfast we share between ourselves. 

"It's no coincidence there's no food here" Rainier chews off fried bacon. "They are planning a feast" 

As if the gamemakers heard him, the anthem blares for a minute before Cornwall Cerrone's voice echos louder and clear throughout the whole Pyramid: "Greetings, final 8. We would like to invite you all for a grand feast at the cornucopia tomorrow. There will be a gong signaling the feast's commence" 

We take in the news in silence. 

"All the more reason not to stay here anymore. We overstayed our time here" I stand up.

"Hey hold on a minute. We don't know if there's gonna be a feast, and even if there will be, staying here is our best option" says Tate. 

"Care to explain how?" I raise an eyebrow.

"The cornucopia will get replenished. We can get all the good stuff first _and_ we can see everyone coming from a distance. We can even set traps to catch them" 

"Need I remind you one of them is from district 2 and scored an 11 or a perfect 12 like you? And there's Angus too, we know he's unpredictable and-"

A canon severs my line of thought. 

"Who do you think it was for?" Asks Rainier quietly. "Probably the 6 boy. I hit him pretty hard and the Capitol needs bloodshed. He was expendable I guess" says Tate before grabbing an empty bag, filling it with the new water we got from sponsers and the little food we have left. 

"Why don't you go scout around and look for the other tributes? Don't engage. Just watch. Try figure out where are we standing and whose coming to the feast." 

I let out an offended gasp and chuckle when I realize what this is about: "you two want me out doing something so you can be alone!" 

Rainier's face turn bright red.

"No!" Tate says defensively. "we're gonna set traps. You said your father taught you stealth. I bet you are better at that than me" 

I throw the bag over one shoulder. "Fine. I'll go scouting. Please don't do anything funny" 

**Rainier**

I watch Jean walk silently towards the ladder before she is swallowed by the shadows. 

"We aren't going to do anything funny. Right?" I'm still blushing and I hate myself for it. _this will all be over soon and in order to save yourself you gotta detach yourself._ Mama's gentle voice echos in my mind. She once showed me how to shut off my emotions during a critical surgery or stitching, who knew it would apply to the games too?

"Only when we're finished" Tate winks before opening a crate and digging though it. "Help me find rope. There may be traps around the cornucopia but I say we make a few of our own" 

I open a crate full of camping equipment, there's a big reel of rope and I throw it to Tate. "I can make a net to throw on anyone coming closer, it worked once for Finnick so it can definitely work for us. Right?" 

I nod. Pretending to understand. "Uhh what do you want me to do?" 

"Take a look around, identify the traps that are already hidden, we might be able to use that" 

I do as he instructs, there are three traps around the area, one close to the circle of plates (the one that leads to the basement), one closer to the ladder (Jean told us she stepped in one of the traps here back in day 5, could be this one) and another one coming from the left of the cornucopia 

I report all of these to Tate, who nods before returning to his net, I find the way his hands tie knots in seconds before cutting more rope with a knife fascinating, I find the determination in his eyes as he focuses on making the net amazing to look at.

_Damnit! I need to stop looking at him like this. I gotta split after the feast, otherwise I wouldn't be able to continue._

The hours pass, Tate finished his net, he even attached a rope to it so he can throw it better and drag the victim to him if necessary. 

"Are you really gonna kill them if you catch them?" I ask him, we are half cuddling against the inner wall at the mouth of the cornucopia. 

Tate thinks for a second. "If it's one of the Eights, or the Six boy, than no. I'll just toss them into the basement and we'll see if they make it. If it's Clarisse or Jordan or Angus, I will probably, they are too strong to let live, and they tried to hurt us" 

"Seems fair" I shrug. 

A shadow grows close to the cornucopia, Tate draws his sword, but it's just Jean, tired from the mission. "There are three more levels above us, I checked. Angus is hiding, probably in one of those secret rooms like the one you found. I know the Eights are at the highest level, and I almost run into Clarisse at the third level" 

"So Clarisse _is_ alive" Tate reflects. "Yes. Jordan is the one who died. So she's probably looking for revenge on Angus who killed him which is not us" 

"How do you know that?" I ask. 

"She was talking to herself, or the cameras. Anyways we'll be definitely seeing her tomorrow" 

I send a smirk towards Tate who is still gripping the net. "Good thing we'll be ready for her" he says.


	23. Day 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James teaches a younger Jean whats the best course of action as they watch the "blood feast" of the 85th hunger games. 
> 
> In the actual arena, the feast commences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys can comment something so I'll know SOMEONE reached this chapter. Thanks🥰

_"A feast is common in the games, when things get a little too dull for their watchers, the gamemakers gather the tributes to the cornucopia, that is replenished with food and various other goods" Dad commands like a teacher in school._

_"But it's not **mandatory,** right?" _

_"No" dad replies. "You don't have to go. But most of the time the gamemakers tempt you to come with something worthy, that can save your life. Or they force you into the way by sending mutts you have to run from. I've seen it lots of times"_

_I consider it for a second. "So you're saying I should avoid them"_

_"Avoid them at all cost" he nods_

_"And what if I cant? If they do either of the stuff you said, if they have something that can save my life? If they force me into it?"_

_Dad sighs. "Well; then let my friend Grover show you how to make it out of there alive"_

_Kala stands up from the armchair. "James, I came here to help you teach her about the games in the best way suited for an 11 year old; you can't expect her to watch that awful year..." she warns._

_"Why?" I cut her. "I already watched the games last year, and I'll watch this year's too next month. It's best if I deal with it already"_

_Kala's face soften. She crunches down to look at me and I cross my arms in anger. I hate when people look at me like I'm still a toddler. I'll be eligible next year!_

_"Jean, darling. The 85th year had one of the worst feasts of all time, in the Capitol they call it the "blood feast" we didn't have any tributes that died there but... it's not okay. I'm trying to help you avoid it"_

_I consider her offer, before I turn to my dad, he's also thinking, probably trying to find a different year for us to watch._

_"You said you think it's the best way to make it out of a feast alive, right?"_

_Dad nods again. "If he managed to make it out of the chaos there. You can escape any feast that way"_

_"Then I'll watch it"_

_Kala straightens herself and sends a glare towards my dad. "I can't understand your reasons, James. But I won't stop you." She moves towards the door. "Good luck. Jean"_

_The door closes with a shut._

_Dad chooses the reruns option and the number 85. He leaves the interview just so I can see who is gonna end up the victor- dad's best victor friend, Grover Lee from district 5._

_He skips through the cornucopia- only 5 casualties that included one of our own- through the first week, he stops at night 9. "That was the night before the feast"_

_The cameras shows us the remaining ten players waiting for the feast: The Twos, One boy and Four girl together, Grover and his partner Piper, who was sickly pale and needed medical attention woon- , Seven boy, Eight girl and the Twelves._

_According to dad, only four made it out of there._

_As dawn approached, all the teams and individuals started moving automatically towards the cornucopia: as if they were sleep walking, you could see on some of the tributes faces that they were trying to fight it._

_But it looked as if their bodies have been taking over by a higher power, and I felt my stomach twist just by thinking about it happening to me._

_The arena was a maze of tunnels- except for the large concrete floor surrounding the cornucopia, all teams stopped at the point where the tunnel began, and the famous table rose._

_On the table there were seven bags around the same size that bore the number of the districts it was meant for- along with the massive buffet around the bags._

_Every single tribute looked at the table with desire and determination: their intent was clear: their bag, and all the good that surrounded it._

_The Four girl drew the first blood when she throwed a javelin at the Seven boy, who was ready to make a run for it, Killing him instantly._

_Everyone took it as a sign to charge._

_The Two boy and One boy met in the middle and immediately began to spar, Two girl took the opportunity to take the bag sent for her when the Twelve girl and the Four girl cornered her._

_Piper made a few quick steps._

_Grover grabbed her hand tightly, "no, going in there is suicidal. Especially for you" "so are you suggesting we go back and let someone else take our bag?"_

_"We can try and get it another way-" Grover was already turning to go back through the tunnel they came through when he heard a roar that shook the entire tunnel maze ceiling._

_"We can't go back, there's only one way to go" Grover sighs. "Stay here, I'll get it for you"_

_Meanwhile, Two girl shatters a mace into the side of the Twelve girl- the latter doesn't die immediately, and my heart breaks for the girl's agonising pain._

_The Two girl takes the spiked bloody weapon out and goes off to find more people to kill, when three gaping holes appear in her chest- Four girl stands behind her with a trident. Another canon fires._

_Grover breaths slowly and runs in a wide circle around the chaos: the Two boy, mad about his district partner, turned to the four girl instead, Leaving One boy to go after the Twelve boy._

_Grover passed them just as the One boy decapitated the Twelve boy, the head lands right next to the horrified Grover, who keeps on running. Knowing One boy is after him. A third canon fires._

_He reaches the table just in time to grab the bag before Two boy crushes onto the table, the trident in his chest, yet another canon._

_Grover flips the table and dives behind it, Four girl is out of javlins and tridents to throw. Two more canons fire one after the other, the girl is down to two fancy daggers, and she is closing in on his position._

_"Hey look; that girl from Eight is getting away with her bag!" He yells and points to his right in an attempt to throw her off. In reality, the girl was already gone with the bag; but Four girl still looked to where he pointed._

_He bolted in the other direction, trying to not fall at the sight of blood from the 6 corpses still splattered around the courtyard. Four girl gave chase when One boy crushed into her. The sounds of their fight still echoing._

_It was only then Grover felt the gravity of what happened; and as he recounted the canons, he figured out that it meant Piper was gone too._

_Dad turned off the TV. "It took four more days until thr games were concluded. You already know the outcome, what's amazing is that he managed to win without a single kill to his name"_

_"Do you think I can win with no kills?"_

_It was for a split second, but I knew he was hesitating. "Maybe. It is possible"_

_I knew what this hesitation meant: there are so few victors without any kills... maybe I can too._

* * *

**Day Twenty Three**

It's safe to say non of us really slept on night 22. 

Instead we waited inside the mouth of the cornucopia: hiding. Tate was ready with a sword in one hand and the net he made yesterday in the other. 

Even Rainier held a dagger with a tight knuckled grip.

A spotlight of blue light shined in the middle of the semicircle of starting plates, and a table rose slowly:

Weapons in a big pile, various big medical kits and other mystery bags, at least a dozen water canteens filled with fresh cold water, and an all you can eat buffet: pots filled with the best food the Capitol kitchen can offer, fresh fruit in a big basket...

I was... basically salivating over it for a minute before I heard the gong that brought me back into focus. 

It was the same gong as the one that signals the beginning of the games once the 60 seconds are over. It ended as fast as it started, but I could feel the pyramid above us shaking. 

"I feel like everyone are gonna come now" Rainier sighs. 

"Isn't that what we are going for?" Asked Tate.

"What are we going for again?" I muse. "Defending our territory I guess. We don't want the other tributes getting all of that" Rainier looked over his hiding spot to see if anyone was coming. 

"Are we gonna kill them?" 

My question stayed floating in silence for a minute. "If we have to. Especially when it comes to Clarisse and Angus" Tate's eyes filled with weird determination.

 _He killed before._ I remind myself. _And he's also right._ Tribute James shrugs. (Can metaphorical representation of my survival instincts _shrug_?) _Y_ _ou're not here_ _to help them get to the tasty food, your goal is to be the last one standing, you have to let Tate take out Clarisse or one of the Eights to be that last one._

There are so few who won without killing anyone. I know my dad would hate to see me kill, but since he killed during his games, he doesn't really get to tell me that it's not how he wants me to win.

 _Do whatever you have to do to get back to me, I'll understand you better than anyone._ He said the last time I saw him.

A shadow of a girl sneaking close to the table breaks my train of thought, Tate already throws the net, that closes on the girl, he pulls to knock her down and she screams in a high pitch voice- meaning she is not Clarisse. 

"Take this rope and keep her down, I just know Clarisse is here and I gotta finish my deal with her" Tate gives me the rope before he steps out of our hiding. "Rainier. Go find Eight boy" 

The clear lights of the cornucopia were dimmed for the dramatic impact once the gong sounded. But Rainier still goes. 

As soon as Tate and who I believe is Clarisse first make contact, the lights go back on in full power, almost blinding me. Yes, Tate found Clarisse, and now the two "Perfect Twelves" fight eachother for the first time in three weeks, Sword against Spear.

Eight girl tries to tag at the net. "Just let me get that one bag with our number on it!" She yells and I now with the new added light, see a small bag marked with the number 8. 

I don't know what should I do with her, our goal was to defend the table from the other tributes, maybe there's a special medicine in it for one of the eights. 

I decide to ignore her, instead focusing on the main fight between Tate and Clarisse: the two were fast, and blocked eachother's attacks with grace you can only find in those who practiced with this weapon for over a decade. 

_If only I could distract Clarisse with something..._

I remember a feast from a different year, one my dad showed me, it maybe dumb, but it worked for Grover, and Clarisse might be enough of an idiot to fall for it. 

"Hey Clarisse, Angus is trying to sneak some food from the table!" 

I don't know what she has with Angus, but yesterday I kind of spied on her, and damn, that girl is _Hell bent_ on killing the outliar boy from Nine. 

Not so Surprisingly, she turns, eyes shining with Rage. What _Was_ surprising, however, was the fact I was _Right._ I could see his pale tall frame on the other end of the table, sneaking food into his pack while Clarisse and Tate fought. 

"It's not over, Haybrook!" She warns, before running back to catch him, and he was _fast._

Tate was standing in the middle, wiping sweat from his brow when suddenly he gasped in suprise, my eyes widened when I realized why.

A dagger struck out from his stomach. 

"No, Tate!" I found myself screaming. I dropped the rope holding down Eight girl as Tate dropped to his knees, behind him stood Eight boy, a bloody dagger in his hand. 

Tate already dropped to his knees and I knocked down Eight boy when I heard Rainier running towards us, Eight girl was still stuck in the net. 

I found myself not thinking as I pounded his face again and again. His face were a bloody mess, I pulled him to his knees and brought the two sais in an X near his throught. He gasped in terror.

"Wait, don't!" Eight girl finally broke free from the net, she now stood with the Eight bag in her hand. Weighing her options. 

"You try to run, I'll slit his throat" I hiss. 

Eight girl drops the bag and holds her hands in surrender. "Your partner is a healer and can probably save Tate, right?" 

"You better fucking hope he can. If he doesn't.." I bring the two sais closer to Eight boy's throat. 

"That's the deal. That dagger was poisoned, I can give you the cure" Eight girl says in a shaky voice. Rainier, still working on the wound, turned to me: "It's not worse than the one I already took care of. All I gotta do is renew and add some stitches. If it was poisoned however..." 

"I have the cure, I swear! It's in the bag we got. Cory was also poisoned when we got attacked by a mutt. We- we can share the antidote, right?" 

"The antidote, and I won't kill Cory" my voice is barely recognizable to me. 

Eight girl hasitates. 

"Do you want him to die now or _What?!_ " I bark. 

"Just give her the antidote, Leslie!" Cory pleads, half choking. 

Leslie throws the bag marked with Eight at my feet, I let go of Cory's bloody, shaking body as his partner picks him off the floor and drags him away. 

Rainier is working very close to me, his hands disinfect and stitch up the new wound with the skill of a professional tailor, like the ones in district 8.

District 8... only now the weight of my actions lands on me and I let out a wild sob. "I- I didn't mean! I was just so _angry.._ I wanted him to suffer" 

Rainier breaths a few heavy breaths. "Okay.. Okay. I can save him now with this" he holds up the bottle that the Eight bag contained: a small, white bottle with transparent liquid inside. He leans in close, listening to Tate's quiet, weak heartbeat. 

At least his heart is still beating. 

Rainier takes a syringe from the kit the feast brought us, he puts the antidote in it and carefully injects it into Tate's bloodstream. 

We both crush next to eachother in exhaustion, refusing to get up.

"Hey Jean?" Rainier calls quietly.

"Yes?" 

"Please don't do that again.." he says quietly. "what you did. I didn't know you back home but.. I knew you were kind of a sweetheart, that you are a good person. Your dad taught you well. Don't let these games ruin you" 

I think about my dad watching me right now. What is he thinking about me now? 

_do whatever you need to get back to me._ I repeat the goal to myself: it's my dad's request, I add Rainier's too; 

_Do whatever you need to get back, but don't let it come at the cost of your heart._

_Sounds like a solid goal to me.._


	24. Day 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tate Haybrook joined the training program to defend himself at the arena, not because everyone did it.  
> Marina Haybrook made her son vow to not kill anyone. He is still determined to keep that promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We officially enter the last week of the games :)

_Molina seems less cheerful this year for some reason._

_Maybe it's the rumors I heard, that she's getting replaced next year because she's too old to be pretty for the cameras._

_The training program kids really love to gossip._

_Would I consider some my friends? Yeah, the more sensible ones, the ones who **don't** try to get the cameras focused on them during victory tours. How selfish can you be?! If you're good enough, you'll get your 15 minutes of fame during the games. _

_It's only later that Mayor Witherspoon reads the victors that I realize I am gonna have my 15 minutes of fame, that I was chosen to volunteer._

_Pascal, my best friend, says it's my fault for being too good of a swordfighter._

_Once you're picked, you can't refuse. It's not a written rule but a consensus statement that is agreed by everyone: if you refuse to volunteer, you're a pussy, and you're making the district look bad at the reaping._

_My district partner is gonna be Valerie Nerossa. One of the sensible ones, thankfully. She looks cheeky and confident while going onstage. I try my best to remember the acting and impression lessons Finnick Odair comes to teach once in a while. To look as best as I can when I know the cameras are on me._

_We shake hands and walk quietly to the justice building to say our goodbyes._

_I know who's coming and who isn't; I'm not dumb, I know my stepfather is thrilled by this, the possibility of me dying so he can do as he pleases to my mom._

_That fucker never tried again after my testing score of perfect 12 came from the program and I came home._

_Mom holds me as tight as she can: she grabs me by the shoulders and refuses to let them go even if I'm half a foot taller than her. "You listen to me: I don't care what Basil does to me, you don't worry about me and you focus on staying alive so you prove to him that he is wrong."_

_"I will do my best, mom" I wipe away a tear on her cheek._

_"I know you will" she leans against my chest for a minute, listening to my heart beat, since there's a possibility of this being the last time she hears it, she refuses to let go._

_"Promise me one more thing, Tate-"_

_"Anything, mom"_

_She wipes her face with the back of her hand. "Promise me you won't.. you won't kill anyone. Unless you truly have to, only if you dying is the only other option." She grabs my shoulders again. "Promise me you won't be like the rest of them"_

_I look down at her Hazel eyes, green and brown clashing into eachother, she is the strongest woman I know, letting herself being married to a fucking asshole to keep me and her above the poverty line..._

_"I promise mom. I won't. And when I'll win. I'll win you a house in the richest part of Four. Not some stupid Northen Uplands flat that Sir douche thinks is fancy"_

_"Good. I love you, little shark"_

_"I love you too, mom"_

_*****_

_"It's not fair we have two legacies to compete with" Valerie groans_ _. "They'll take all the sponsers"._

_"Don't say that, I'm sure that with a good story and your good looks you can buy yourselves a chance" says Atalanta._

_My supposed mentor Achilles has been looking at me up and down ever since we boarded this train. "You are an eye candy for them. Hadn't it been for Madame Snow's new rules. You would be in the circle"_

_"Are you saying I'm handsome, Mr Demourt?" I chuckle. Achilles' serious expression didn't change._

_I decide to ignore his comment._

_The rest of the preparation week goes smoothly, I'd pride myself for pretending to befriend my pack members (I can kinda get Ophelia, she just wanna prove she's more than Alexa Elle''s sister, but the Twos are just plain horrible)_

_My promise to my mom echos in my head, I can avoid killing at the cornucopia, but for how long before they call me out on my "cowardness"?_

_Still, I won't kill. I repeat to myself. I won't be like this Clarisse girl or Nyx._

_*****_

_Turns out I didn't have to._

_I was pretending to "guard the cornucopia" to avoid getting my hands dirty but Nyx pushes my further to go after the district 11 boy. All I'll do is.._

_What exactly is my plan? If I knock him out and let someone else do the job, would that still count?_

**_Yes it does count._ ** _Says a voice that sounds suspiciously like my dad, my real dad. I knock the boy down and watch how his eyes widen..._

_Before I get to do anything I find myself - and the boy- free falling and then cold water. Even in the dim light of a hologram I could keep myself afloat, next to me I could hear the desperate gasps of the 11 boy, who clearly can't swim._

_If he drowns, it wouldn't be my fault, would it?_

**_Yes; It will be. My sweet little shark. You have the power to save him._ ** _Mom's voice rings like a huge bell in my head. I drag the boy to where I see the distant land made of rocks. The look in his eyes when he realises I saved is worth it._

_It's day three and the careers just killed another tribute they found. Rainier leans his head on my shoulder gently- Achilles came up with the love act, and Rainier is learning how to play it._

_"I'm glad you're not up there with them. Hunting tributes for the hell of it"_

_I chuckle... **I'm glad too, pal.** "You know, it's stupid but.. I made myself a promise I won't be like them. I won't kill unless I truly, really; must" _

_Rainier looks up to me with his silly little smile I've taken a liking to. "That's the kind of mindest I promised myself to have too! Maybe we aren't so different after all."_

_Maybe we aren't. And I'm gonna keep that promise for as long as I can._

_Untill I'm crowned victor, mom._

* * *

**Day Twenty Four**

**Jean**

When I wake up, I can already see Rainier kneeling next to Tate.

"What's wrong?" I come closer, hesitantly. I don't like interrupting Rainier when he's working, the look in his determined eyes is a bit scary. 

"I don't know, Tate just seems a bit weak" 

"Well he was stabbed with poisoned dagger yesterday, of course he would be weak" I shrug.

Rainier looks at me with an annoyed expression. "That's not what I meant. He is sweating a lot, I doubt that it has anything to do with his wound" I look at Tate's bare chest and stomach, Rainier probably changed his bandages while I was asleep. 

"I'm fine" Tate Groans and pushes himself on his elbows. "Care to bring me something to eat?" 

I don't argue with him and go to the multiple crates and bags where we gathered all the food left from the feast. I come back to them with a canteen of water and some fresh fruit and cheese. 

We eat in silence. "Do you think the traps would be enough to get the Eights and Clarisse away?" Tate asks. 

Rainier and I exchange looks. "I don't think the Eights are gonna come back" I say with a half guilty laugh. 

"Why not?" 

"Jean.. kind of... held a knife to 8 boy's- Cory- throat and threatened the girl to give us the antidote to save you" Rainier bites his lips.

"I- I was so angry because he stabbed you... and I wasn't thinking. I know we agreed to not kill but.." 

"Its okay. You didn't kill him" Tate nods. He bites on a banana and he turns to me to say another thing but instead he doubles to the side and throws up black fluid. And his eyes roll back as he falls unconscious.

"This is definitely not good" says Rainier, who gently wipes some of it from Tate's chin.

We spend a couple more hours like this: Tate wakes up, spends a few confused minutes with us before throwing up and falls unconscious again. 

"There's something with the antidote, I'm sure" I lead Rainier away from Tate. "I can go find the Eights. Demand what this was about.." 

"No" he says. "You did enough yesterday" 

"What?! Look Rainier, I think they tricked us; maybe.. maybe there was no poison on the knife"

Rainier's eyes widen: "are you saying... are you saying I injected Tate with poison I thought was an antidote?" 

"I'm saying that's a possiblity!" 

"In that case, why did you even believe her in the first place?" He questions. "Are you- are you blaming me for forcing Leslie into giving us the antidote?!" 

"I'm saying we both got fooled" Rainier sighs. "Because if we injected him with posion.." he turned away to look at Tate's unconscious form. 

Neither of us wanted to finish that sentence.

In some painful irony, Tate woke up, we both ran and kneeled next to him. Up close he looked even worse: the white around his eyes yellowed, the black fluid started to drip from his nose as well, and he was sweating even heavily.

"I'm going to die, aren't I?" He asked quietly. 

"No you're not" Rainier lied. "I can- I can save you" 

"If there's something I learned on you for the last few weeks, is that you are a terrible liar, Rainier Herya" Tate half chuckles; before violent coughs shake his body. 

"No.." Rainier whispers, cupping Tate's face in his hands. Tate takes one of Rainier's palms with shaking hands. "It's okay. At least... I kept my promise"

I have no idea what promise he made, but Rainier seems to understand, and it breaks something in him, he starts crying. "My mom.. must be proud.. I made that promise to her... and I didn't kill anybody" Tate manages to give me and Rainier a full smile, his teeth are covered in the black fluid. 

Rainier sobs, burying his face in Tate's chest. "And I won't have... to face against you in.. in the finale anymore" Tate looks at me with glinting eyes. 

I feel my eyes burning, trying to keep my emotions at bay. But my body gives up as the tears stream down my face. Rainier is laying on top of Tate, their faces are inches apart: Tate whispers something, Rainier whispers back through sobs words I can't make up.

On his last bits of strength, Tate drags himself up on his elbows: "Do it for me, I love you" he says in his voice. "And I love you too; mom" he cries; look up to where I guess there's a camera. 

on Tate's last minutes, Rainier holds his hands, whispering soft declarations of love while I stroke his hair, not able to find the fitting words to say. 

The canon finally fires, ending what presumably was a painful, long death. 

I have to forcibly tear Rainier away from Tate's body so the hovercraft can take it. I help him sit up but he simply crushes into me, still sobbing. 

I wrap my hands around his back, I have no idea how long we stayed like that, but at some point, I started crying too: Tate saved me so many times, he was the first Career that managed to win over me, the one who _Didn't_ betray me.

The only one I told about my traitorous dreams. 

_No justice, no peace._ The chant from my dream echos again in my mind. For a second.

Rainier volunteers to guard. I know he wants to mourn in peace. So I let him. 

But tomorrow, someone is gonna pay. 


	25. Day 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rainier remembers what it was like to lose his brother
> 
> In the arena; he tries to prevent Jean from doing something she can't take back.

_Giorno Fluxes looks very strange._

_It's the first time mama allowed me to come with her to the reaping, and here I thought Capitol people are "amazing dressers"_

_But he just looks like an alien from afar, a green alien with a crooked nose and white hair._

_"Welcome Welcome, kids! To the reaping of the 103rd hunger games! Two brave young souls will grace this stage, and get to represent your district in the most honorable, the most glamorous competition ever known in Panem!" His voice is strange too, who talks like some high pitched squirrel?!_

_"He's 15, he can get through, he's 15 he'll get through this, he's 15.." mama stands next to me with her eyes closed, she murmurs this over and over, as If trying to convince herself that Yake won't get chosen._

_The girl is a 14 year old named Kiera, Giorno's hand reaches for the boy's bowl..._

_"Yake Herya!"_

_Mama cries out and I grab her hand tightly. "Mama, the peacekeepers are watching, please be quiet..." I hold onto her tightly, and she just sobs while clutching me as Giorno closes the ceremony._

_"Please try to win" I pat Yake on the back. "I will, promise me you'll be a good healer?" He crunched down to meet my eyes. "I promise" I reply_

_He clutches my shoulders. "Promise me you'll take care of mama" I don't answer, answering would mean acknowledging he has a chance to die at the games._

_Yake clutches my shoulder harder. "Promise me, Rainier!"_

_"I- I promise"_

_I leave early to prepare dinner as mother closes herself in the side room she uses as an infirmary. I don't blame her._

_I drink every moment my brother is on the screens, I watch him try to pull off a nice act in the interview.._

_Mama doesn't leave the infirmary so I drag myself to the mandatory view of the bloodbath. The cameras show Yake rising up the tube and I look at him in awe._

_You can do this, please...I believe in you.._

_Yake grabs a back and I give everyone near me a proud smile, my brother can avoid the cornucopia like a champ!_

_And then the sword pierced his chest._

_It's the girl from district 2, she doesn't flinch at the kill before she pulls back her bloody sword to go find someone else to kill._

_So many other kids die in horrible ways my mind can't even take in, I am too busy thinking about Yake, with his face to the floor, the blood pools up around him as seven more kids join him and the concrete floor is red and wet with blood._

_Yake is dead, Yake is dead, Yake is dead. He's not coming back, he was the first blood, he is gone, he is gone, he is gone!_

_I didn't even noticed mendatory hours were over until someone tagged at me shoulder._

_"Come on kid, I'll take you home" Elijah, one of the strong men from the strawberry field, patted my back with his hand. I didn't even realize I was frozen there, my mouth still hanging open._

_Mother doesn't leave the infirmary for the duration of the games, or the months after that, one autumn afternoom I walked in, hesitant, fearing she simply collapsed dead from hunger, or who knows what?!_

_I found her carefully stitching an old man's arm, her face emotionless yet determined. After she finishes, the peacekeeper near the door takes the old man back to work._

_"Come, my boy, I'll teach you"_

_She looks as if she aged 20 years over the past four months. I join her near the operating table. "I throw myself into work to get me distracted. It helps, a lot, and I could use a assistant"_

_I nod, usually she called me to take care of the sick. But I need to learn how to do both, right? I remember my promise to Yake._

_I'll take care of her for you, brother._

_She starts by showing me how to thread the needle, and that the two patches of skin must be held down together. I think about the reapers in the apple picking machines, losing a hand or getting it pretty bad is common as the peacekeepers around the district._

_"How will I find the strength to do this? To look at all that blood.... and what if it was someone I know? Like Uncle Bill? Or his son Lucius? What if I'm in the games?-" bad idea, why mention the games?!_

_Mama flinches for a second, at the mention of the games, or the possibility of me going in them like Yake did. But then I recall her face as she worked: how focused she looked, how her expression showed almost no emotion. "Your face.. is that how you do it?"_

_She nods. "Yes, emotions can't get in your way when you stitch someone up, son. You must put them aside"_

_"How do you do that? How do you put them aside?" I ask desperately. If there is a way to make my anger and my grief and this constant search for Yake near me when I wake up dissapear... I have to know._

_"You remind yourself that this is someone who needs you, who trusts you to save their life or fix their problem. That if you let your fear take over, you would never be able to finish the job" she stares at the door, as if ready for the next patient to be dropped at her table._

_I nod, understanding but also disappointed. I can't use this way on my grief, I can't make it go away._

_"Look at me, my boy. You are doing an important job. The most important in all of the district. In every district. And I am proud to have you. We can both get over whatever thing the Capitol throws at us because we are **Essential** to them, understand?" _

_"Yes mama, I understand"_

_****_

_I help mother study herself on the podium near Yake's banner as I give Carmen De Silva the most determined, angry look I can give her: she needs to feel the guilt of her action. She needs to know that her repeated speech does nothing to ease my pain and Mama's pain._

_Can careers even feel anything? Surely they can't._

_That night mother comes to tuck me into bed. "I knew you were angry with that girl, I was too, at the beginning. But I have no place in my heart for hate. That revenge is not going to make you feel any better, if she is such a horrible girl, she'll get what's coming to her, I'm sure"_

_"Okay, mama"_

_"Now go to sleep, my boy. We have a day of treating people ahead of us"_

* * *

**Day Twenty Five**

**Rainier**

I hope something is happening with the Eights or Clarisse, because Jean and I spent most of our day grieving.

There was no body, but we allowed ourselves to still "drink in Tate's honor" the canteens that were left from the feast. 

"Do you wanna talk about it? When my brother died I spent my days talking with Elijah, you know him? The district appointed head of field work" I try.

Jean remains silent, she was silent like this when Ophelia died as well, it's probably her way of taking in the grief.

I know I can't be left alone with my thoughts anymore because I'll break again like last night. So I get up and sit closer to Jean. "Hey. Can you please say something? Anything at all? I need conversation to keep myself from the grief so please..." I try reaching out to her.

"It's my fault" she hisses.

_Well that's not what I expected her to say._

_"_ what? What are you talking about?!" 

"My fault" she repeats. "I forced Leslie to give us that antidote, only it _wasn't_ an antidote, and now Tate's dead" 

"you didn't know" I make her look at me. "She tricked us both" 

"I could've killed that Eight boy right there. I _should've_ killed him there" she stares ahead, her voice sharpened on the second phrase.

I cup her face with my palms, forcing her to look me in the eye. "Snap out of this, Jean! We agreed on Night 23 that you won't do that again. You won't threat people like this" 

"That was before Tate died!" Her voice finally breaks and I can see the tears forming in her eyes. 

"Don't you think his death hurts me too?" My voice shakes. "You know there's nothing more I'd like than getting payback. But that's not who I am. That's not who you are!" 

"How do you know?! Are we supposed to sit here and wait for Clarisse or Angus to kill them?" Jean crawls away from my grasp. "I just _know_ the audiance wants us to go after them. It's the right thing to do if we want sponsers, if we want _Justice_ " 

"That's no justice, that's a vendetta" I wipe my face. 

"How can you be so fucking okay with this!" She yells. 

"After my brother died in the games, I wanted to make Carmen de Silva's life hell. My mom talked with me about her, She said: "I have no place in my heart for hate" and that if Carmen- or Leslie and Cory- are such horrible people; they will get what's coming for them, it doesn't have to be by our hands. We'll keep our concionce clear." 

Jean doesn't look at me. "I forgot... your brother died in the games" 

"So did your friend" I know this is far from helping but I have to ask. "What did you do when Medea Vaughn came to visit? When you had to let her into your house?" 

Jean thinks for a moment. "I was angry but I didn't really bother to hide it. I found something else to focus my anger on." 

I don't ask what is that thing; but Jean's expression change, she smiles, probably at a memory she remembered.

"And you got over it. So please.. don't blame yourself, and don't go after the Eights. Let Lady justice or Clarisse or the gamemakers to do their shit. They will take care of them." 

She nods. "Fine.. you almost lost me there, Rainier" she pants, crawling towards me and wrapping her hands around me in a hug. 

That night we see no one's seal again. "You know" I look at Jean from across the lantern we used as a fire.. "I was planning on leaving the alliance after the feast, couldn't bare to kill you or Tate" 

She sighs. "Me too, luckily the Tate problem was fixed but you and me..." she stops, looking at me in question.

"You are the closest thing I ever had to a sister, you're a great ally and survivor.. I'd like to keep you with me, at least until tomorrow night" 

"At least until tomorrow night." She nods.

**Jean**

I love Rainier, he's the one true friend I had since Hailey, but there's no way I'm staying until tomorrow night. 

I let him take first watch this time, he doesn't question a thing. Before I lie down to sleep, I smile at him. "You know you're the closest thing I ever had to a brother too, right?" 

He chuckles. "Goodnight, Jean" 

"Goodnight"

I cluch the sais tighter as I lie down in my sleeping bag.

 _Rainier may believe in this justice bullshit, but don't tell me you do too, right?_ Tribute James is back again, if he could cross his arms in anger, he would've. 

_No I don't believe this justice, I'm gonna act._

I can't take on them both, someone has to take care of Cory, But I'll take on Leslie myself, and since Rainier isn't gonna do that, I gotta use the other tributes that are left.

Since I'm pretty convinced Angus is.. not so stable in his mind, and I wouldn't wanna risk everything because of his unpredictable behavior.

So I'm down to one last option, that I am not thrilled about either. She might be a heartless killer, but a heartless killer is what I need:

I gotta find a way to get Clarisse St Mark to help me. 


	26. Day 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James Talks with Medea 
> 
> In the arena, Jean forms a dangerous alliance in order to inact her vengeance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tommorow would mark the 1 year anniversary of me writing on here (and for this fandom too)! I can't believe it's been a year and I've improved so much!
> 
> My goal is to reach 50k words on this work- a novel's length- because If I can do fanfic that is 50k, I can finish my original WIP book! 
> 
> Love you all and thank you for your kudos, your hits and especially your comments 💕

_"I'm rooting for her"_ _Medea walks by me to the elevator that goes down to the mourge._

_I turn to Kala: "do you mind watching over them today?" "Not at all" she smiles. "Good, I'll go talk to Medea for a few hours, maybe get a drink"._

_I leave the room to that damned elevator. Medea is there, carefully watching over the Capitol workers taking the poison out of his system and making him presentable for the parents that will probably wanna see him._

_"Your boy did a great job stitching his wounds up, if it wasn't for the poison, he would have live" says one of the mourge attendants, who sees me standing by the entrance._

_Yes.. he would have lived, but for how long? Until the finale?_

_"At least we got one battle of the twelve scoring tributes before he died, amirite? His daughter kinda broke it up but it was awesome" says another to his friend, who nods in response._

_Damn, these people can't see the gravity of their job, can't they?! Tate has a family that grieves for him, but you act as if he was a character in a story!_

_Maybe it's because I come here every year, usually very early. But this year both Jean and Rainier are in the final 6. A rarity I haven't seen since my own games, and Wren was still dead by day 4._

_Maybe it's me remembering every time I got down to take care of them and look at their dead faces, about those kids that I couldn't do anything but watch as they were stabbed, slashed, drowned, torn apart by mutts or any other method of killings._

_Maybe I remember looking their families in the eyes and seeing how my grief is nothing compared to theirs._

_"Is it your first time down here?" I approach Medea._

_"No, last year they sent me to take care of Laius Orethi, remember him?"_

_"Of course" I chuckle. "He was a big contender, taught our victor Emery how to sword fight"_

_"That Elenia girl from district one gouged his eyes out, I forced myself to look because I convinced myself this is the best preparation for the next tributes that could die in worse ways" she hugs herself, trying not to shiver._

_"It's cold here, how about I'll buy you a drink at Elias'? It's a great coffee too, if you'd rather not drink something alcoholic. We can talk there"_

_She considers my offer, "you were always this nice, even in my victory tour. Sure, I'll come with you, you mind if I bring Achilles too? It would be kind of awkward to drink just you and me"_

_I nod, there's a twenty year age difference between us, I can't possibly blame her for being precaution. "Of course, meet you there in twenty?"_

_"Deal" she chuckles and runs off to the elevator._

_I hang around for a bit, watching the attendants dress Tate in a royal blue suit, his face don't look like paper and his eyes no longer yellowed.._

_I catch the next elevator and ask Giorno to order a car. "Can you believe this? Both our tributes still alive in the final 6!"_

_Yes... **our** tributes..._

_I wait for Medea and Achilles by the bar, when they walk in, some eyes turn towards them, before immediately going back to their food, whispering amongst themselves. Probably something about "coming to drink their loss"_

_"James" Achilles Demourt shakes my hand firmly. Medea goes straight to the bar: "your strongest whiskey" she tells Elias. He just nods in return and goes to find her what she looks for._

_I guess that's what I like about Elias, he doesn't ask questions and he always keeps a warm stool and a strong bottle for the victors; he doesn't play the games on the screens during the morning, only when he knows there aren't any victors around._

_Never thought I could call a Capitolite honorable, but Elias definitely comes close to being that Capitolite._

_Elias returns with Madea's bottle and a crystal glass. She pours some into the glass and immediately downs it. "I'm sorry. About Tate, he seemed like a good kid"_

_"I guess he was, he told me the night before the games that he promised his mother he won't be a killer. And he wasn't, in the end" Achilles gives me a sad smile and orders his own drink._

_I don't feel like drinking, I have a feelimg the games would last long, at least a week longer, and I can't afford myself getting distracted, not when Jean is so close to getting the crown._

_"Do you really want her to win?" I ask Medea. "I guess some part of me still has guilt for what I did to her, I was the same age as she is now in the games. She seems like a good kid that you deserve to bring home"_

_"Rainier can be a great victor too" adds Achilles._

_I think about Rainier for a bit, the kind hearted healer who loved Tate and asked Jean yesterday to never threat anyone like she did again._

_When I saw Jean like that, the two blades at Cory's throat, the determination in her eyes, I wanted to crawl through the screen. But that night Rainier said exactly what I desperately wanted to say._

_Would I be mad if he won? Of course, it meant Jean would die if he did, but isn't saving him still worth it?_

_It is, he is worth it._

_"We'll have to wait and see" I sigh._

_Night have slowly fallen, I return to the mentors room to relieve Kala of her duty. Nothing bad happened on Night 24._

_On day 25, Jean has a little breakdown, I shut my eyes tight to keep the tears away. Rainier holds her, asks her to promise to him she won't go after Leslie and Cory. I smile, silently thanking him for doing what I can't do._

_It's in the early morning hours of day 26 Jean starts putting some food into a bag, and takes her sais and an extra dagger. She moves silently towards the ladder, just like I taught her._

_"Oh no Jean, what are you_ **_doing_ ** _?!"_

* * *

**Day twenty Six**

**Jean**

The arena seems colder at these hours, probably to imitate the coldness of early mornings. 

I climb the ladder to the first level as quietly as I can. Before I sweep the first level to find the other ladder that leads to the second (well, technically third) level, where I know Clarisse is camping. 

I find her by the little light coming from a lantern she probably got from sponsers. She lies unmoving next to a torch, in the same technic I saw Ophelia sleep in the three days I spent with her. 

Speaking of Ophelia, the very unpleasant memory of Clarisse ready to drive her spear through me resurfaces. 

_She's your best shot at revenge, you just have to be careful and calculated about it._ Tribute James reminds me. 

She sleeps in a nice sleeping bag, her iron spear laid right next to it, she is probably fast enough to turn around and grab it. 

Without making a sound, I pick it up and throw it as further as I can, it makes no sound when it lands in the sand. 

_she probably has an extra knife on her, she isn't stupid._ Warns Tribute James. _I have to be cautious then._

I pin her down by kneeling on her stomach, when I bring the dagger to her throat and her eyes open immediately. 

Instead of attacking, she chuckles quietly. "You have nerve, Legacy girl." 

"I'm not here to kill you" 

That causes her to laugh louder. "You couldn't if you tried. You want something from me, don't you?" I notice her wiggling something inside the sleeping bag, probably that hidden knife. "It's because of Tate. He's dead" I hiss, keeping the dagger close to her neck.

"So I've seen. Shame, would've been a great finale, but I guess you're the second best option. It's the only reason why you're not dead right now" up close, I can see her eyes are two different colors: one dark brown like mine, one almost _golden,_ like a wolf's. 

"And who killed him, exactly?" Clarisse asks, curious. 

"Not Angus. Part of the deal I wanna make with you is that you get to do whatever twisted thing you wanna do to him." 

"A deal, huh?" 

"I'll remove the dagger, and you'll help me take care of the Eights, you get a kill, maybe two, I get my justice for Tate's death." I try to look as intimidating as I can. 

"And I get to do what I want when I find Angus?"

"He's not who I'm after. You can have him." 

"Oh, so it's "I" now? What about your partner?" Clarisse raises her eyebrows. I bite my lip hard. "I splited from him, to save myself the pain of dealing with him later. Just.. don't do anything to him now. Wait until after you killed Angus" 

"Okay.. I agree to the terms. Now remove the dagger then" 

Hesitantly, I get off her as quickly as I can. She gets up and stretches her legs, I note the little knife she was, indeed, holding. Little yet still deadly. 

She's wearing just the tank top and khakis, and I don't see any sign that the cold is bothering her. "Where's my spear" she turns to me, as if she already knew what my plan was. "I threw it in that direction" I point. 

"You're smart, Trojillio, way smarter than the other legacy in this game." 

"Angus killed Ophelia too, you know" I tidy myself up. "All the more reason why the sick fucker deserves to die. Don't worry, I'll cut him for Ophelia too if you care that much" Clarisse returns with the spear and throws a jacket over her shoulder. 

That jacket is a little too big, even for her muscular broad shoulders. "It was Jordan's" she says, as if she knew what I was thinking. 

"You know where they are hiding?" I ask. "I've been following Angus for ten days now, I know he found a hidden room on this level, the Eights are definitely on the top floor above us, they found a hidden room too" 

"How did they even manage to stay alive this long?" I wonder. "You and our trio, we took all the sponsers, and there is no food sources" 

"Not ones that you know of, Trojillio" 

We walk in silence when I spot the ladder. "I'm going first" says Clarisse and places one leg on the first holding grip. "don't worry, I can be stealthy If I want" 

"Tate said you were the hunter of the career alliance" "back when there was one" she shugs. 

It suddenly accrued to me that she already lost all of her alliance members. She is walking around alone for over a week hoping to catch the one person responsible for two of their deaths. I lost Tate, what- two days ago? Near the finale too...

Around 10 feet above us stood the pyramid's roof. The top level was pretty small, decorated the same way as the other levels, with the torches on the walls in permanent distances from eachother. But here there was no glass floor that looks down at the cornucopia. 

"There aren't many places to hide in here, like I said, they found a secret room where they are hiding, cowards" Clarisse scoffs. 

"Have you ever stumbled over one of the rooms?" 

"No" she replies.

"Well, Rainier and Tate have. The entrances can be hidden in the torches." I pull and wiggle each of them, Clarisse does the same.

I reach for the last one in my row, the one in the corner that seemingly incapable of containing an entrance to a room behind it.. 

But it opened into a dark, narrow hallway and flight of stairs. "Here, found the entrance." I exclaim.

"After you, legacy girl. And stay quiet" Clarisse voice is low

I don't argue and go up first: the longer I went up, the more I could hear Leslie and Cory's voice, laughing. "Aren't you happy we found this place? It's amazing" 

The stairs open into a big room with glass walls that basically _floats_ above the pyramid, I'm ready to step forward, Cory and Leslie still don't know I'm here, but the sand near the entrance to the room is a little too darker from what I've seen.. "There's a trap in the entrance, watch it" I whisper as quietly as I can to Clarisse behind me. 

I skip over it and land in the sand where my feet make no sound. Clarisse passes me and charges at Cory with her spear before he even realizes. 

While they are struggling I turned to Leslie, who was holding a little knife with shaking hands. "How can you work _with_ her?!" She cried out.

"You lied to me, your lie caused Tate's death. So I needed someone to help me take care of your partner while I take care of _you_ " I push her against one of the glass walls. 

My dagger from before is at her throat, I'm this ready to slice it... 

Leslie tries to aim for my throat with her knife but I dodge it easily enough- Leslie is clearly not a fighter- and still, she manages to slice a cut on my left arm. 

We can hear Cory's loud cry when Clarisse manages to shove her spear on his abdomen. 

"No!" Leslie's moment of checking on her partner gives me the strength I need to pin her against the wall again, harder.

The wall cracks. 

Cory cries louder as Clarisse twists the spear. 

A canon fires. 

Clarisse pulls the bloody spear out. "You need help with her?" 

I don't believe the word came out of my mouth. "No, take what you want from them and leave." I shove Leslie against the wall again, the cracks begin to worsen. 

On my third shove, a hole breaks.

The wind hits my face as Leslie fall through, screaming. I'm left hanging on to the broken edges that weren't destroyed, ignoring the pain, watching Leslie fall down... down... until all I can see is a little red stain on the side of the golden pyramid.

A canon fires. 

"Damn, Trojillio, I'm impressed. Didn't think you had it in you" I turn to see Clarisse stuffing food into a bag from the big pile, her eyebrows raised in suprise. 

Now I finally have a chance to look at the room for real: it's got multiple crates of food lying around, two big canteens of water glued to the furthest wall from me, with taps to open and close. There's an actual bed.. 

"What is this place?" I finally find the voice to speak. 

"I don't know, like a second cornucopia. It's got all they need. I think I might stay here. Which means you can't" Clarisse drops the bag. 

I only manage to nod before I drop to my knees. "What's up with you?" Clarisse looks at me with a furrowed expression. 

I look at the scratch Leslie inflicted on me. "That bitch" I pant. "The knife she had was poisoned" 

I don't remember how I got down, it was all a rush of ladders and dizziness and lights spinning around me. And a shiny gold thing was before me, someone was running towards me. I know that guy... don't I? 

"What did you do to her?!" His voice sounded like I was listening from underwater. "Fucking nothing! The only reason I am doing this Is because I want her against me in the finale" says a female voice. I feel myself being dropped.

The boy grabs me wrist, it hurts and I'm not sure wether the yell I heard was me or in my mind. 

"Speaking of which. Hopefully I'll see her there, I have a slippy bitch to catch. So have this gift" says the female voice. 

The boy runs off and I can't hear him anymore. The world continues to spin around me when I hear the boy's voice again, like I'm underwater...

"Hey- hey stay with me, I'll get you an antidote I swear. Jean- just.. stay with me!" 

I don't hear the rest of his sentence because the world stops being dizzy and instead goes black. 


	27. Day 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James, stunned by Jean's actions, goes drinking with Grover and Katniss again. 
> 
> In the arena, Rainier watches over a regretful, broken Jean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 1 year anniversary to my Ao3 account! 
> 
> If you read Endless Chain or any of my earlier works from the first series, and then you reach this chapter of this story, I am sure you can see the growth. Which would've been nothing without you guys! Almost every story I posted here has over 100 hits, and seeing the numbers grow everyday fills me with warmth. As does your kudos and comments. (Thank you, Iomhar for being the latest one🥰) 
> 
> You guys are the best and I love you all💕

_I can't bring myself to look away from my screen._

_Since Jean technically aliied with Clarisse, Carmen came to sit with me today. "She really does have nerve, it'll serve her well in the finale"._

_I don't answer, all I can think about is Jean watching the girl plummet down to her death, knowing Jean pushed her._

_"Hey, Trojillio, you good?" I can hear worry in Carmen's voice. "I think He's in shock, not surprising" Mae Steele walks by, on her way to the mourge to treat her tribute, the one Jean **killed**. _

_"What?! Should- should I call someone? At least let Kala know.." Carmen jumps up_

_"No need, I'm fine" I manage to regain the ability to speak. On the screen, Jean drops to her knees because of the poisoned dagger Leslie scratched her with._

_I barely have the power to react, Clarisse carries her down the ladders with suprising force, she drops her next to A stunned Rainier. "..-Speaking of which, I hope I'll see her there, I got a slippery bitch to catch, consider this a gift" Clarisse says before running off again._

_"You are not Fine, Trojillio, I'm gonna call Kala to take care of your tributes, you need to leave this place and have a glass of strong whiskey, I can get you some from Nero if you want" Carmen grabs my wrist and basically drags me into the break room._

_"And I'm calling Medea, she'll take you back to the tribute center" she sits me down on one of the sofas._

_"It's okay, kid" I hear Lee's familiar voice to my right. "I'll take care of him. But if you can call up Kala to take care of Jean's poison problem that would be wonderful"_

_Carmen was ready with a comeback- probably about the 'kid' part- but instead she went back into the mentors room to get Kala on the phone._

_"Why was she even helping me?" I ask quietly as Grover closes the car door next to me. The black vehicle makes no sound as it rushes through the city._

_Lee sighs: "You look like shit, James. You don't have to be from the career districts to see that, and you know how the younger ones are... still figuring shit out, she was probably freaked out by you not responding"_

_"My daughter killed someone"_

_"So did you, not everyone are as lucky as I am" Grover presses on the driver's button. "Hey, care to change route to this place? Thank you"_

_"I thought you were taking me to the tribute center" my voice sounds dry and tired, like I spent the whole day screaming._

_"De Silva is right: you need a drink, come on, we're almost there"_

_"Elias'? Seriously?" I barely have any strength left to argue so I just let Grover lead me inside. "Heard you were coming so I saved you a seat and bought you a bottle, on me" Katniss Everdeen turns to us, there's a bit of warmth in those usually cold grey eyes._

_I take the bottle and let the liquid burn down it's way in my throat. "Jean wasn't thinking clearly, but I guarentee you she'll be okay now, she's with your boy Rainier now. He'll understand" Grover assures me._

_I hope he will._

_I down the entire bottle as the night slowly goes darker, the numbness of alchohol starts taking root in my brain and I feel my body giving in to it. After a while, I feel the tiredness overtake my unprepared body, maybe I should go back to the tribute cente...._

_"I'm off to sleep. Hey, Grover.." the thought of Kala sitting in the mentors room all night floats my mind._

_"Yeah?"_

_"Can you go watch Jean and Rainier for me? I don't wanna exhaust Kala anymore tonight"_

_"Of course, Jimmy. Now let's get you back"_

_Despite the light dizziness and drunkness I still see Thalia and Kovthe in my nighmares, this time, Jean is there with us by the cliff, she throws off the girl from Eight into the pink boiling ocean, without flinching._

_She turns to me and **laughs.**_

_I wake up with a gasp, and not a second later I feel the hangover setting in: my head pounds and my muscles scream in frustration as I get up to wash my face._

_It's been so long since I looked in a mirror, have I always looked so bad?_

_There are visible bags around my eyes, to the point my eyes look half dead. My hair has gotten longer and curlier, and I can see a lot more grey streaks then I remembered, I suppose these were added over the last four weeks._

_Four weeks, it's been almost four weeks since the games began, the Calendar near the bathroom sink marks July 16th, it's been a month._

_Grover was right, I do look like shit._

_I call up the mentors line and ask for the Eleven station: Kala's soft voice replies. "Good morning, Gentle Giant, how's your hangover?"_

_"Getting better" I lie._

_"Don't bother to come today or tonight. I gathered some of your friends to help out and watch Jean and Rainier when I get tired. We're getting close to that finale"_

_I remember the poisoned dagger. "Jean, is she okay? The dagger-"_

_"She's fine, James, your sponser numbers have gone up and we managed to buy her the real, working, antidote- Prim told us the name of the drug" Lee appeared on the other end of the call._

_"Who's.. we?"_

_"Just me, Kala, the district Four team, the Everdeen sisters, Matthew Mellark and Alexa Elle Sheridan" Grover chuckles._

_So many victors, rooting for my Jean? I almost let out a cry laugh of the bizzarity and amazingness of the situation. All these victors, coming together. To help me get my rest while they care for my daughter and Rainier. "Thank you" is all I manage to say, "thank you all"_

_Kala probably took the phone from Grover because I hear her voice again. "Remember James Dear, you are not in this alone, please take this day to rest and relax. We believe Jean or Rainier can do this. Whatever it takes, see you on day 28"_

_And then she hangs up, and I'm left with my thoughts again, never a good thing._

* * *

**Day Twenty Seven**

**Rainier**

The parachute came about two minutes after Clarisse dropped the unconscious Jean next to me. 

It had a bottle of transparent liquid, a syringe and a note that read; _30 cc of the stuff would do. from one Healer to another, we all believe in you :) - K and the team._

One healer to another... Kala doesn't know how to heal, but a memory of Tate and I in that hidden room floods my mind: _it's like Prim Everdeen's games all over again: you're the healer from an outlying district, I'm your handsome district 4 unlikely ally, we even have a legacy!_ The memory of Tate's voice fills me with warmth. 

I do as Prim's advice instructs, I inject the antidote into the vain next to the scratch before I disinfect and bandage it. 

I leave her to rest for a few hours as I clean up my space of the cornucopia and do a mental countdown of the medkit equipment, kind of like I did all the time with Mama. 

"Rainier..?" Jean's voice is dry, she clears her throat once and drinks from the bottle I left her there. 

I don't reply. 

"I'm sorry" she chokes. "I shouldn't have gone behind your back, I should've left both of them to Clarisse's mercy" 

I come to sit next to her, bringing her what food I could still salvage from the feast loot before it'll go bad. "What happened?" 

"I convinced Clarisse to help me go after the Eights, and that's what she did.. she killed Cory. And then she asked if I needed help with Leslie- I should've said yes. I should've let her deal with Leslie!" Jean whimpers. 

"What did you do?" 

"They were hiding in a room that was made of Glass at the top level of the pyramid, I.. I broke a hole and pushed Leslie off it.. she was the second canon" 

I gasp.. "so.. you- you killed her" 

She nods, not being able to say it out loud. "I- I'm so sorry, Rainier" she sobbed. "It wasn't accidental either or- or self defense... she was pleading me to stop- and I heard her screaming when she fell... " she continued sobbing, I hesitantly rub her back 

"I- you didn't know what you were doing" 

"It's not an excuse!" She cries. "You were angry, you were desperate. Okay? It's the hunger games; not everyone can be Seeder Howell or Grover Lee, you're bound to have one kill at least" I grab her shoulders.

"My dad, he- he probably saw what I did.. I promised him, I promised him I would only kill if I have to" she breaths heavily, I hold her down in silence for a minute. Listening to her heavy breaths. 

"He's your father, he loves you more than life. Nothing you do is gonna change that. My mother is like that too; I know she'll love me even after the arena." 

I let her cry in my arms for as long as she needs. "Just know I'm here. Okay? I forgive you for running off. I'm here and we'll stay together at least until Clarisse kills Angus" I softly stroke her dirty black curls as she lies in my lap. 

"When will you think that be?" She sniffs. 

"It's Angus, he's slippery and fast, It'll take her at least another day, maybe two." I shrug. 

"And after?" 

"Do- do you wanna stay with me?" I scoff in suprise. "Even when it's down to only us and Clarisse?" 

"I'm gonna need you. She's really strong, we need two to defeat her." Jean sits up and exhales slowly. "Hopefully she'll take one of us with her"

She tries to shrug it off as something trivial, but I can see the worry in her eyes thinking about this. 

"I dont know, Jean. We both have a parent to go back to.. this has become too hard, don't you agree?" 

"Just.. until Angus is dead, or Clarisse, who knows?" Jean lies back in the sand. "I could really use your emotional support.. at least until tonight. For real this time" 

"Okay" I shake her hand. "Deal, until tonight" 

The sky tonight show no one's picture, but the Capitol is probably still riding on the high of yesterday's kills.

We split the last bits of non perishable food between us, she takes her share and stuff it into a bag: "I'll go to the level above this one, maybe try to find a room to hide in, Or back to my corner." Says Jean. "But you, Rainier, should stay here. It's safer, and no one would come down to find you." 

"Okay, I will" 

She starts to walk. "Wait!" I call out. 

She turns. "What?"

I give her a hug, we stay like that for a minute. "Good luck, Jean. May the odds be in your favor" I smile. 

"May the odds be in your favor too, Rainier. Let's hope we'll never meet again" she strokes my cheek softly, there are tears in her eyes. 

"Let's hope" I reply. 

And then she turns and walks away, my eyes follow her until she completely vanishes in the shadows. 

I crash down on my sleeping bag, looking at the glass ceiling and the holographic blue 27 I know is there. 

We're down to Four tributes, I can see the end over the horizon. I look over to where Jean went..

 _How can this possibly end for us?_ and more importantly: _how do I find a way to be the one coming out of this alive?_


	28. Day 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James meets up with Eleven's stylists Inigio and Clymene and regroups with Kala and the rest of supporting group. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean considers her next moves

_I try to tidy myself up as best as I can, I feel better today, good enough to get back into the mentors room._

_I wash my face and try to slik my curls back, before picking something presentable to put and calling the elevator._

_Apparently someone was already up and ready to meet me: "Oh my makers, James! Is that really how you plan to go back to the mentors room?!" Clymene Serirua, Eleven's offical stylist- with her companion and partne Inigio- stepped out of the elevator and immediately cupped my face. "We're taking you to Remake center. If your daughter is gonna win these games, you can't just... look this neglected!"_

_"What- What's wrong with how I look?"_

_Clymene scoffs. "You people in the districts think "lesser is better" And '"ts not about the outside". Well, not here, darling"_

_I know there is no point in arguing, so I let Clymene and Inigio basically drag me down to the remake center at the basement; where they wax and cut my hair and take care of every detail they deem unfit for a victor- or the father of one._

_"Do you really think my daughter can win this?" I ask Clymene. "We saw her journey; we watched her develop as a character from the beginning and we're more than rooting for her success!"_

_So she's just a character to them... a bit disgusting that's how they see us, but I don't comment._

_"Speaking of which" says Inigio._ _"Come, get dressed, we have something to show you"_

_I get dressed quickly and follow them into a side room. "Our studio" Clymene presents._

_Their studio was a big room with pink short walls, pink lightning, no windows and onw door- the one we walked in through- inside there were various types of machines that look nothing like the ones back at home, that are probably the latest tech from Three._

_In the middle of the room stood two Mannequins: one wearing a suit: the shirt inside was purple- inlaced with shining little stones at the collar- with a light brown vest and a dark green blazer, also inlaced with stones or glitter or whatever._

_The dress was dark purple, with bare shoulders and transparent purple sleeves that flow down to the floor, the back is completely exposed. There is a low cut on the left side that is decorated with glitter too. The mannequin wears a choker necklace made of different color gems that almost resemble a crown of fruit._

_"The necklace is a beauty, isn't it?" Clymene stares at her design with teary violet eyes._

_"Are these Gems...real?"_

_"Of course! Only the best from district one for our possible victor, or victors" her eyes move to the suit._

_"Never in my life I've seen two Elevens reach the final 4. Two Twelves, yes a long time ago. But not Elevens"_

_"Well, get used to it. The Nine boy will die of hunger or Clarisse soon, and Jean and Rainier can take her out together. And then you have a definite shot of winning!" Clymene claps in excitement._

_I prefer not to think about Jean and Rainier fighting eachother, thank you.._

_"I'll go to the mentors room now, at your permission"_ _I don't wait for her answer._

_As soon as the car reaches the victors lounge, I go straight through the lounge area, and the sponsers den -that was pretty full for this early in the morning- and the break room and almost kick down the door back to the mentors room itself._

_Grover sits by the Eleven screen with Achilles Demourt, the Eleven screen has spilt up- meaning Jean and Rainier are no longer together in the same place. On the main feed, Clarisse fights a type of dragon mutt sent her way._

_Our station, I realize, is pretty popular- this usually happens during the final day, but it appears that a lot of victors chose to spend their time here instead of mingling with Capitolites down in the sponsers den, or around the city._

_"Kala has gone down to recruit some more sponsers for your daughter, Medea has taken on raising sponsers for Rainier, most have migrated to Jean tho, now that their alliance is broken" Grover reports._

_Still, Prim Everdeen and Matthew Mellark watched from their station near ours, and Alexa Elle Sheridan just entered, bringing coffee from the break room._

_"James, you're back" she chuckled and set the coffee mugs down._

_Achilles clears the spot near Jean's screen and pats me on the back. "I'll check on Medea down there; see if she wants to switch now that you're back, she adores you, you know". He chuckles._

_I lean against the chair, Jean is still asleep- it's one of her tactics in a place where you don't need to forge for survival, sleep though most of the day to keep yourself awake at night to guard._

_I taught her well._

_"Why are you doing this?" I turn to ask before Achilles goes back down the stairs._

_"Well, you're my best friend, Jimmy-" Grover begins, but I cut him off. "All due respect, Lee, but I know you're my friend, I asked all the rest"_

_"She and Tate were allies, we usually root for our tributes' allies when they die" says Achilles before leaving. "Those allies are usually the pack. Not this year, though" Alexa Elle settles down in a chair behind me._

_I don't answer, I remember grabbing her by the neck when I thought Jean was dead.. "but I hurt you. Your sister died to save Jean's life. Why would **You** root for her?" _

_Alexa Elle grabs Matthew's hand. "Well, she also saved my sister's life. And she or Rainier would be a better pick than Clarisse St Mark, no offense" she looked at Carmen, who returned back in her station one row before us, only Nero, her fellow mentor, sat with her._

_Next to Nina Fitzgerald at the district 9 station sat no one._

_"And you?" I ask Prim._

_"Katniss likes you. She was convinced your girl would die, I wanna prove her wrong, and I still might" she shurgs. "Matthew is more in Rainier's favor, but we all agree: the victory should be for district 11"_

_The other victors nod in agreement. I feel my heart flatter again: rare camaraderie amongst the victors, amongst the districts._

_Maybe one day we can use this camaraderie against the real enemy._

* * *

**Day twenty Eight**

The roars from one floor above me jerk me awake. 

I can clearly tell the watchers got bored; so the gamemakers added a bit of spice to Angus and Clarisse's Cat and mouse game.

Now after Tate's gone, our alliance is not really watcher wrothy- mostly because it's nonexistent as of yesterday, and until these stupid games end already. 

_You made the right decision._ Says Tribute James. _It was too dangerous to stay with him, and he wasn't much of a fighter- even dead weight, just let Clarisse or Angus kill him quick and you'll be good to-_

_No! I can't think like that. I can't wish death on Rainier! Besides, he's not weak, his set of skills saved me, multiple times._

But it can't be me behind his death, whoever comes out alive out of Clarisse and Angus' showdown, that's who is gonna kill Rainier. 

Since both Clarisse and Angus are smart, I gotta think of a way to outsmart them- Clarisse got a perfect 12 score in training, no way I'll be able to defeat her in a fight. 

Is there a way I can get her (let's be honest, it's probably gonna be Clarisse) down to the basement? Maybe drown her or let the shark mutt maul her? At least with that, my hands would be clean of her blood. 

_Your hands are not clean, you hypocrite bitch._ A whispering voice that sounds like Leslie has started to take root in my mind...

Maybe I am going crazy, who knows?

 _Focus!._ Tribute James demands. 

The basement is out of the question, I deem. Since I can't swim, Clarisse can definitely use this against me. The Lake would've been an advantage to someone like Tate. 

_Fuck. Just thinking about him causes the last five days' events go crazy in my mind._

I guess there's a chance the gamemakers will find a way to get us to the cornucopia for a final showdown. But other than the traps -which I'm sure Clarisse knows how to avoid- I have nothing there to help me besides Rainier himself. 

Maybe I can use this level to my advantage.. 

There's the glass floor in the middle of this level that can help me if I can get Clarisse to fall through it, but I'll have to find a way to break it first. 

I carefully walk through on it, watching and avoiding the holographic 28 in the middle. If I concentrate I can see Rainiee bellow, not doing much, barely visible inside the mouth of the cornucopia. 

_I'm gonna need a fucking Sledgehammer to break this glass ceiling!_ I grunt in frustration. 

_Unless you can find a way to melt the glass.._ Tribute James suggests. 

Melt the glass, for that I'd have to burn the cornucopia. Rainier's hiding place. Am I up for it? I know there is gasoline to use in those crates- almost ten days ago Angus tried to burn us. 

But can I do it to Rainier? I promised to not see him again unless I have to, and this is maybe even betraying his trust.

I need to get a message through to him. 

At night, the temperature's clearly dropped, I force myself to cover with my sleeping bag, Rainier has gone out to sleep outside the mouth, maybe to guard. 

_wait a minute, through the glass floor! I can try and write a messege from the cold surface the temperature drop created._

Carefuly, I glide towards the icy glass floor. Rainier lies right beneath it, his eyes widen as I move my fingers to write an upside down message on the glass 

_When you hear the canon, burn the cornucopia._


	29. Day 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarisse St mark grew up knowing one thing: Winning is a above all, because losers have to deal with her father's wrath. 
> 
> The games are a win win, right? If she wins, she wins her father's respect. If she loses, he might be disappointed, but it won't be her problem anymore. 
> 
> It would be her sister's problem. And She'll kill every tribute necessary to keep her safe. One outliar with poison daggers is not gonna deny her the victory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again I named a character completely randomly before giving it the full back story inspired by another character named the same. 
> 
> No but seriously, stan Rick Riordan and stan my bitch queen of character development Clarisse La Rue (who is obviously the inspiration behind this whole chapter haha)

_I can't keep my nerves calm._

_That was never my strong suit, being calm. But since today would decide my future, you can't really blame me._

_This is my final Volunteer choosing ceremony, on my last year, I managed to score a place among the four finalists. That's the first step in my plan completed._

_Next step: get chosen, so I won't have to hide away in the outer villages. **He'll find you even if you run..** that cold thought is frightening but also true: there is no hiding from Simon St Mark._

_Head Trainer Athena Rolland is already near the booth, I take my seat in the first four chairs meant for us. "Welcome to the announcement" Athena doesn't have to do anything to excite us. It's enough for her to talk regularly in her commanding voice to send shivers of excitement down my spine._

_"I'll call on Carmen De Silva to announce our female volunteer" short applause as our newest victor marches to the booth._

_"This is my first year to pick our volunteer, and the girl I chose had scored almost perfectly. I'm pretty convinced she is a natural born victor: Clarisse St Mark, please"_

_My name, she called my name!_

_It takes a whistle from Jordan on the boys' finalist row to snap me out of my shock. I immediately run to the stage to shake Carmen's hand vigorously. "Thank you! I won't let our district down. I promise!"_

_I feel like a 100 pound weight has been lifted from my chest. **This will please father.**_

_Until the weight is back because Nero Wilderham called Jordan's name._

_Out of all the boys in the district, in the whole centre, Nero had to pick the one boy that actually made me think I have a chance at love._

_****_

_I can't sit still at the goodbye room as I wait for my family to come say goodbye, it doesn't take long until my dad basically kicks down the door out of happiness._

_"My girl! Our district's champion." He grabs my shoulders. "You are gonna come back with a crown on your head and you **know** that" _

_As an ex captain of the peacekeepers force here in Two, every district 2 peacekeeper is familiar with the name St Mark, they all salute him and immediately agree with his words._

_"Yes father. The alternative is not coming back at all" I try not to stammer at his face._

_He scoffs. "Of course, that would make me very disappointed. I wouldn't wanna bury my own daughter. Not like it's gonna happen!"_

_His pat on my back almost made me jump. My body immediately relaxed when Sloane entered, hesitant. "Hey" she fidgeted with her bead necklace._

_Permission to say goodbye to my sister? I stare at father in question. He nods._ _"I'll wait outside. You don't fail me; girl!" He pointed at me one last time before leaving._

_It's weird Sloane and I look nothing alike, dad liked the idea of fucking two random women, and then collect his daughters when he was forced to leave the peacekeepers force._

_She is my full sister and I don't give a **fuck** what the rest of the people at the academy think. _

_"I know this year is definitely yours" she chuckles nervously. "But promise me you'd come home. Okay? I'm scared about what will happen if you don't"_

_I don't need to guess why she fears that. "I'll kill whoever I have to, with my bare hands if I need. If I still don't.. run, okay? Don't look back. Run for the mountains."_

_"They will catch me, and **he** has them in his back pocket" she whispers. "I'm still eligible for the reaping." _

_"You got two more years, that's nothing. You know what, I'll strike a deal with Carmen. I promise you: whatever happens. You won't fear him anymore, okay?"_

_Sloane nods. "You still have the sword I gave you?" I ask. Sloane nods again. "Good. Then you can always remember me if.. you know"_

_"That won't happen. You are the best fighter this district ever had. If you can't pull this off, no one can" Sloane hugs me tightly._

_"You might"_

_Her face sours at that. The peacekeeper signals five minutes. "I wanna give you a token" she takes off the beaded necklace, she started making one three years ago, when she entered residential. One bead for each year. "Take it"_

_"Sloane-"_

_"Please, Clarisse." She puts it in my hand. "You know what dad thinks about Tokens. That they are fake and stupid and for outlying districts and pussies" I qoute._

"I know, I know. But they don't have to know you have one. Hide it under your clothes or something; just.. take it. And bring it back to me. With your living hands. Please" 

I take it and hide it inside my dress. Sloane gives me one last hug. "I love you" she whispers. 

"Love you too" 

****

_I can't sleep, not when the games start tomorrow._

_I decide to check the kitchen, maybe the Capitol has some fancy ass drink to help you relax your mind._

_"why are you up so late?" Carmen leans on the counter, a cup of coffee in her hand. "Nerves" is all I say. "Didn't expect the daughter of Simon St Mark to be nervous. I bet your dad raised you like he did his soldiers"_

_"I don't think it was a good thing"_

_Carmen's expression furrows. "Oh. Okay.. well, do you wanna talk about it? I'm still your mentor"_

_I sit down and fidget with Sloane's necklace. "I didn't know you had a token" Carmen raises her eyebrow but doesn't pry or asks to see it. "My baby sister gave it to me. My dad doesn't like tokens but I had to take it"_

_"I don't blame you" Carmen shurgs. "You probably care a great deal about her"_

_I remember the promise I made Sloane... if I don't come back.. "Carmen. I know there is a small chance but.. if I won't come back.. could you do me a favor?"_

_This causes her eyebrows to rise even higher. "Of course, what is it?"_

_"Take care of my sister. Make sure.. make sure he won't try to get his frustration on her.." I feel like the room's temperature has been dropped a great deal just by the mention of him.._

_"I'll keep an eye out for her" Carmen promises. She looks into my eyes and I know she'll keep it._

* * *

**Day Twenty Nine**

**Clarisse**

It took me half the night- mid fight I watched the holographic 28 change into a 29- until I finally got to shove my spear through the fucking mutt's eye, and watch it fall through the same hole Trojillio pushed the Eight girl through three days ago. 

"Fuck" I groan as I jump off its scaled back and land hard on my legs, my left ankle is twisted, maybe even broken. 

I collapse in exhaustion on the bed in the hidden room I camped in since I killed Eight boy. A note from Carmen said this place was nicknamed: "The Oasis". for its refillable supplies and the actual bed I crawled in. Later I'll Check the damage the mutt did. 

When I wake up, the temperatures have risen again. I take off Jordan's jacket and tie it around my waist instead. This hidden room is a mess in shumbles, but the new food delivery still arrived.

I eat a relatively good breakfast before stuffing Eight boy's bag with as much non perishable foods I can carry along with my bag of first aid and water canteens and my spear. 

I walk back down into the last level of the pyramid and sit down to examine my leg. The ankle is swallen and blue, and If It wasn't for my father watching, I would've cried out in pain. 

I know he watches outside of the mandatory hours. I know he actively seeks out every moment I am onscreen. Looking for any sign of weakness.

At least Sloane is safe between the centre's walls. 

I bandage it the best that I can, and use my spear as a cane. _my plan hasn't changed, you little outliar bastard._ I clench my teeth. _I'll still make you scream for mercy._

I go down the ladder with caution, trying to make as little noise as I can with an improvised cane. And start the _annoying_ ritual of checking each torch to see wether it opens into a hidden room the little pussy from Nine would be in. 

As if the universe -or the gamemakers- smiled at me, a hidden room was open not a few feet away from me, I run, ignoring the pain in my leg, sweep the entire room, but all I found was a bunch of his things: a little pack, and a tank full of a smelly, familiar liquid. 

Gasoline. 

My anger calms a little bit, he might not be here; but he clearly internded to come back here. And I can destroy his hideout, he would have to sneak out in the open level of the pyramid, and I'll be waiting: _got you, fucker._

I pour the gasoline inside, all around the floor and the hallway that leads to the hidden room. I take one of the torches of this level and set it all on fire.

The fire is so entertaining to watch.. I can't wipe the smirk off my face. Today; he's a dead man. 

I lean on the pyramid's wall close to the still burning room, enough to watch his tall pale frame trying to sneak close to the walls. 

He stops when he sees the fire. Even from afar I can see his expression: like a deer caught in headlights. 

I chuck my spear as accurate as I can. The satisfying noise it made when it hit his stomach burned into my mind forever. 

It was enough to nail him to the pyramid wall he tried to sneak close to; I cross the few feet that separate us and take the spear out, in one sweep. 

Blood spreads across his golden arena jacket, he pants and tries to run past me, but instead he drops to his knees. "Where's your poison daggers now?" I ask in a sickly sweet voice that is Dripping venom. 

"All out of" he spits blood in my face. 

"Good. I hope you enjoyed our little cat and mouse game. It did give me purpose in these games. Kind of like a motive, it builds character." I lick my lips. "So I guess I gotta thank you for making me a favorite. But this little vendetta has come to an end" I raise my spear with one hand, twirl it twice for the cool shot, and shove it right through his heart. 

The canon that fired afterwards was music to my ears. I collapse again in relief, laughing until I couldn't anymore.

_I did it. I finally fucking did it!_

"I did it, Jordan!" I say in between heavy breaths. "I fucking did it, y'all!" I yell at the upper level. 

I stare in satisfaction as his picture projects in the sky that night. The holographic 29 is my only source of light. 

Two more kills and I can go home, the healer boy would be easy. Trojillio... maybe not so much. 

But then again, it wouldn't be as rewarding if my final fight is no fight at all. - my dad's words, not mine. 

I lie back, using one of my bags as a pillow. Even if it's hidden inside my tank top, I decide to take a bold risk and take out Sloane's necklace. I fidget with the beads, just like she usually did. 

_What does she thinks about what she sees me do? She knows it's the only way, she knows that's how winning works. Hopefully._

I can't help but think about her, during summer, weekends at home are more common. Thinking about her sitting with our father as he comments everything I do wrong, hugging her knees, scared to mess up anything so she won't get punished... 

_No, get these thoughts out of your head now. You gotta focus on doing your own thing. Your own thing to keep Sloane safe._

I continue to stare at the holographic 29 in hopes I'll fall asleep already. So I can rechange to track down and kill the healer boy, so I can face Jean Trojillio in the finale. 

Hopefully it will all be over tomorrow.

_My return is closer than ever, Sloane._


	30. Day 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James writes a letter to Rainier's mother, just in case. 
> 
> In the arena, Jean and Rainier meet up one last time to execute their plan to take care of Clarisse. Jean wonders what she should do if its down to her and Rainier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holyshit Holyshit Holyshit One?? More?? Episode??   
> (To the games at least. If I won't hit 50k after chapter 31- which is very likely- I will write an epilogue on the victory tour!)

_Day 29 was nothing special for nether Rainier not Jean, but Clarisse had finally killed Angus._

_Nina Fitzgerald left down to the mourge without saying anything, Achilles went down to comfort her._

_It now meant Jean and Rainier were both at the final three._

_"It's just like in my games" Katniss chuckles and leans back in her chair. "Two outliars from the same district try to fight off a district 2 tribute, unaware that they would have to take on eachother a few hours later"._

_"Trust me. Both Jean and Rainier are fully aware of this fact. They are holding on to hope that Clarisse will take one of them with her" I sigh._

_"That is.. not impossible" says Grover._

_"You need to prepare to accept either of them as a victor" says Prim. "Yes, I know" I chuckle._

_"That means either of them." Katniss' grey eyes stayed focus on me, digging into my skull. "I will be fully there to support Rainier if he wins. Find ways to.. deal with my grief somehow else. I'm sure Cecelia can help me, or You" I turn to Prim._

_She nods. "Yes. I can help you"._

_We all watch Jean wake up, she immediately rushes over to her corner, since Clarisse has gone down to the level Jean is._

_I look at Rainier next to Kala's screen. Near the end of the games, sponsers are no longer needed, so she came back to sit next to me as we wait for the games to end._

_He is going through the crates, looking for something. Probably the gasoline for Jean's strange plan._

_I never forget a tribute's face, especially not over the last ten years- no matter how early they died- and Rainier looks so much like his brother.. an aged up version of his brother.._

_If he died, what will be left for Brianne Herya? Nothing; both her sons would've died the games, one was the first blood, one will probably be the last death before a victor is announced._

_If Jean wins, I can't let Mrs Herya think I never cared for her son at all._

_"Matthew, care to bring me some papers and a pen from the sponsers den downstairs?" I ask. The victor of the latest quell only shurgs. "Sure"_

_When he returns, I start writing:_

_Dear Mrs Herya, Brianne._

_I'm so sorry I couldn't save him._

_When your first son died, I hoped with all my heart, that your family wouldn't have to endure any more pain now that you've lost your first boy. When Jean's name was called in the reaping, I was devestated, it was nothing compared to the anguish you felt now that another one of your sons has been taken._

_I'm sure you've seen by now your son's journey in these games, he found love in Tate Haybrook and a true friend in my daughter, who's life he saved multiple times- and I can't stress my gratitude enough for it._

_And I'm sorry I couldn't bring them both home. That it was my daughter who survived and not your son._

_I always saw you as a pure soul, the most essential part of our district's part. Now, I see you as a woman in so much pain I wish I could help with. I want to start repenting for it:_

_if you desire, if you need the confort, I hoped you could at least come stay with Jean and I in the victors village. Of course continuing your important work, but at least you won't be alone in those harsh nights._

_I felt alone and helpless every minute of these games, every uncertain moment of every day, not knowing if my daughter would live or not. These endless nights roaming lost? it's something I know at least a little about- after Moira died, even when you tried your best to save her._

_This letter can't possibly compensate for your loss. But I wanted to get it out of my chance in case you'd go through the worst thing that can happen to a parent, again._

_With love and respect,_

_-James Trojillio_

_"what exactly is your plan here?" Grover reads beyond my shoulder. "She can't blame you specifically if he died"_

_"She's would be in immense pain. After every thing her family did for mine, I wanted to at least try and help the poor woman." I exclaim._

_Grover smiles. "You're a damn good man, Jimmy. I sometimes wish I was more like you"_

* * *

**Day Thirty**

**Jean**

I sneak as close to the walls as I can now that Clarisse is here too. I reach the ladder and go down to the cornucopia's level without making a sound. 

I bolt through the area that is bellow the glass ceiling/floor. Hoping Clarisse doesn't check. 

Rainier is still hiding in the mouth. "I poured it across the semicircle of plates, now if you light it there will be a ring of fire. " he whispers. 

"It's not why I ask you to burn the cornucopia, but it would be helpful to trap her in that fire ring" I reply. 

"Why _did_ you ask me to burn the cornucopia?" He asks. 

"A safety precaution. It would be helpful to burn a hole into the glass celing we can push her into. Because let's be honest, non of us would beat her in a fight"

"That is actually very smart" he chuckles. 

The smell ot the gasoline crawls into my nose and I try my best not to inhale it, I help Rainier pour the gasoline on the wooden pile of crates that can definitely serve our purpose in reaching all the way to the glass ceiling. 

Rainier stands on the look out. I hear him gasping. "She's coming!" He yells out.

And there she was, Clarisse charged at us at top speed; as she got closer I noted she's half limping, probably a result of her fight with either Angus or the mutt. 

"Split up!" I yell towards Rainier as we both scramble into different directions. The lighter was still in my hand. 

Clarisse wasted no time and ran after Rainier. I remember what she told me four daye ago: _now that Tate's gone, you are the only worthy opponent for the finale._

Her plan is Rainier, just him. 

He leads her in circles inside the semicircle where the bloodbath first occured. Her clearly twisted ankle slows her down, and she's probably making things worse for herself. 

"Now!" He yells out. I light the ring of gasoline and watch as it ignites quickly, creating the fire ring around Clarisse. 

Rainier jumps outside of it on the last second. The fire reaches the crates, that explode in a mess of oranges and yellows. Clarisse takes an unwanted step backwards. 

Rainier joins me where I stood. Clarisse scans through the fire ring looking for us. I foolishly lock eyes with her. She can't go through the fire, but a I see her face curl into a wicked smirk. 

She won't throw her spear, she's not that stupid to let go of her only weapon. But something still struck Rainier, sending him back. 

A throwing knife. 

"Rainier!" I catch him before he falls, Clarisse dissapeared. 

_how did she dissapear like that?!._ I continue to try and look for her behind the fire wall. _she must've found the trap that leads to the basement._ answers Tribute James. _it doesn't matter, she's gone for now._

Rainier is still in my hands, luckily Clarisse's aim was miscalculated by the fire, but she still hit his shoulder. "Ow, Ow!" He yells out when I drag him away towards the ladder. 

"We can go back to my corner to treat you" i say. 

"Jean, we're the final three. I think you should just leave me here." 

I stop im my tracks. "No! I still wanna give you a chance. I'm sure the games end tomorrow, don't you want to spend the last night together?" 

He sighs. "Maybe you are right" 

In the torchlight, Rainier tries to guide me as best as he can on how to treat his wound. "Just...take the knife out by three. Make sure you have the gaze with iodine ready" I pour the iodine on the gaze and meet his eyes. 

"Ready? This will hurt like a bitch" 

"I've had worse" he sighs. "I'm ready" 

"Okay" I use a piece of my jacket to take out the burning hot knife." I'm gonna count to three, One-" 

"Wait, on three or after three- _Holy SHIT!"_ I Didn't wait for the count and pulled it out anyway. I attach the gaze to the entry wound and stick it up with medical duct tape. 

"You didn't kill me, that's good" Rainier mutters. 

"I can be a decent healer, I guess" 

At night, we settle in to watch the anthem play for what will definitely be the last time. "Can you believe we've been here for a month?" I lean my head against his non injured shoulder. "Really?" His eyebrows furrow. "A month? It felt longer" 

"So a month is fucking short for you, Rainier? That's double the usual length of a game year!" I scoff.

"It's been a little over a month since the reaping, and we both changed so much... I almost can't believe we changed so much in that little time" he sighs. 

"But it'll end tomorrow" 

He backs away a little. "Yes, and we're gonna make sure it'll end with a victory for Eleven" 

I hug my knees. _it'll end tomorrow, sure. But will the Eleven victor be me, Rainier, or you?_


	31. Day 31- Finale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean Remembers her reaping, the one where she had no choice but to march forward. 
> 
> In the arena; a victor is crowned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been a wonderful, hard, amazing journey. I don't know what the word count will look like once I post this, but I'm proud of myself nevertheless. If I can complete and follow a 31 episode story, I can finish my own. This is such an improvement for me and I am so glas y'all got to see it!
> 
> Sure. I've got "double" to work on, but I think I'll take a break with it because Clarisse's chapter inspired some unofficial sequel in my mind! So be prepared for it. 
> 
> As always, love you guys for the hits and the kudos. If you got through the first 6 chapters, I salute you and love you so much💕 
> 
> Hopefully I'll see you all in "Otrera"

_I clutch my ring necklace. "Just this year, and the next one." I whisper before I fall asleep._

_Maybe my father isn't that much of an interesting victor, maybe the gamemakers decide to ignore me in favor of other, more important legacies to come._

_A dark part of my mind whispers to me that this isn't the case._

_At breakfast the next day, neither me nor my dad talk much. The air is tense and gloomy, like it is every reaping day._

_"You wanna talk about it?" Asks my dad. "Let's just hope this year will be like the last two" I shrug. "And even if I was chosen. I think I have a pretty good chance"_

_"You dare to think that?"_

_"You taught me a lot; dad. I have the motivation, I think. Nothing can stop me from getting back" I pick up my plate and take it to the sink._

_"I'm going for a walk. I won't be long, promise" I run out before he even gets a chance at disagreeing._

_The victors village is located in the northern edge of the district, and is surrounded by the forest, that if you go a little further east and cross a wire fence; you'll reach district 12 territory._

_I hear they have it worse than we do._

_The western edge of the forest near the village leads to the field of eternity, where all our dead tributes- and three dead victors in their little wedge- are buried._

_I guess I can visit Hailey; I could use some old luck._

_Her grave stands not the furthest- but on a column close to the left; where more ground was flattened and ready for the tributes of the 110th games._

_I pay my respect for Rosa, Moritz, Hanna and Farroe, The tributes for the last two games, and stop before the grave I was looking for:_

**_Hailey Summit_ **

**_93 ADD- 107 ADD_ **

**_beloved daughter, sister and friend._ **

_The word "beloved friend" doesn't cover who she was to me. I clutch my necklace again, close my eyes and let myself have a moment to mourn again._

_I'll never forget you, Hailey._

_I ran back the way I came so I won't miss my hour of getting ready before the reaping, I reach Kala's house just as the big clock in the justice building far away rings once to signal how it's 1 PM. The reaping would start in an hour._

_Kala waits for me in front of her house; her arms crossed. "Late again, young Lady"_

_"I was at the fields of eternity. Needed Hailey's presence to calm me down."_

_Kala walks me inside. "It's alright; they won't pick you this year. I can tell" on our way upstairs I wave hellos to Kala's two Husbands: Raze and Anthony. Who were enjoying a touching moment of their own in the living room._

_"Let's just get this over with" I sigh and close the bathroom door behind us._

_Kala helps me scrub every inch of myself, she then brings me my usual reaping dress: a white and green sleeveless dress she got me for my birthday._

_"You're not a girl anymore. You're growing into a beautiful young woman. We'll find you something new for next year" Kala chuckles as she finishes taking care of my natural dense curls._

_"I know". I smile at my reflection in the mirror._

_After getting my blood drop taken, I stand in the 17 year old line of the girls section, as Giorno mounts the stage as usual, calling for the mayor to read the treaty of treason and our Five victors._

_"and now.. I'll select the names! As tradition states.. Ladies first!" Giorno's green hand reaches into the ball, moving the papers a bit before selecting a name that would doom an entire family._

_"Your female tribute.. Jean Trojilli- Oh!" His eyebrows lift in suprise._

_You gotta be fucking kidding me._

_They never forget legacies. I remind myself. You knew this would happen, and there's no Hailey to save you now._

_The girls in my row take a step back to clear my path to the aisle and then to the stage._

_Don't look at dad; don't look at dad!_

_I can't help but look... his face showed no emotion- he learned to keep it hidden since the last time they called my name. I stand next to Giorno in silence and with an arched back, like dad taught me to stand when in the presence of a camera._

_Giorno moved onto the boys. "Your male tribute... Rainier Herya!"_

_A hysterical cry erupts from the section where the families typically stand, peacekeepers rush over to the source of noise as I size up my partner in the arena:_

_He isn't very tall or one of the sturdy ones- he's actually pretty scrawny and thin, he is dark skinned like me, his hair curly and dark like mine. His face seem kind, that's what solidified him not as a threat, but an ally_

_"Come now, shake hands!" Giorno directs us. I shake Rainier's hand and the peacekeepers lead us into the justice building to say goodbye._

_Since I have no one to say goodbye to, I sit in the goodbye room meddling in my shitty luck. At least I don't have any siblings to worry about.._

_Legacy deaths are so very common, it's almost funny. I might as well give up now._

_Why? Said a voice that sounded suspiciously like my dad. You learned so much about these games, what makes you think you can't beat them?_

_I smile to myself. With this logic; how can I not be driven to win?_

* * *

**Day Thirty One**

**Jean**

It's still pretty cold when I hesitantly walk towards the glass floor to see if our cornucopia fire achieved it's purpose. 

Surprisingly, the fire below us was still raging- courtesy of the gamemakers- and it did burn a hole of melting glass like we wanted it. 

The holographic number is gone, but then again, so are the other levels above us.

This is really the finale, Huh?

"Rainier, wake up" I shake him, careful not to touch his shoulder wound. "We gotta be ready as early as we can for Clarisse." 

"The fight would take place in the afternoon, we still got time". Rainier mumbles half asleep. "How do you know?" I ask. "They want the districts to watch it, so they wait until they finished work so they can show it on mandatory hours. They always do that" 

I remember all the games I watched with dad; all the games I had to watch with Hailey and her family, yes, Rainier was right. 

"We can still have an early breakfast" I smile and open my bag. There isn't much there, nor in Rainier's bag. But as if the watchers listened to my offer, a parachute- that was golden instead of silver this time- fell lazily from the sky. I stood up to catch it. 

The parachute contained the Capitol's traditional breakfast: fresh fried bacon, four nice eggs, white bread that wasn't hard or too dry to chew on, a box of doughnuts- actual doughnuts!. 

There was also a note that read: _We're all rooting for you._

I don't know who's "all of us" are. But I look up to thank our sponsors immediately. 

"Final breakfast, we're lucky it's good" I set the box of goods in front of Rainier, and we both lounged at the amazing food. Leaving nothing. 

We spend noon talking about would we would do if we won, there was a gloomy tone in that conversation, but we moved past it. "I'd honestly be terrified by the victory tour" Rainier confessed. "Standing in district 4? In district 2?! There's no way I can do it" 

"Oh I know. I'm so used to Welcome other victors, I don't think I can handle being the one visiting." I agree. 

Down from below, we hear a mighty roar. We both jump up. "Shit!" I call out. "It's time" 

"It's starting, I bet it will lead Clarisse here" Rainier stands up, clutching a dagger he brought. "Hopefully" I clench my teeth. 

The roar gets closer, and not a minute later, Clarisse stumbles from the ladder: she looks terrible- and her leg clearly got worse; but she still runs past us. "How about we kill this fucker first, then I'll kill you!" She yells out. 

Just then, the floor close to the ladder broke apart- and a huge bear mutt jumped onto the second floor. "Holy shit! Its strong!" I call out. Before we all scramble and ran in the same direction. 

Clarisse still clutches her spear while running. "You have good aim, you gotta throw it on him!" I yell at her. "Hell no! I need it for later!" She yells back. 

"It's the only way to kill it- long range!" Rainier calls out to my right. 

The bear continues to chase us when I get an idea: "The glass floor!" I yell out to both Rainier and Clarisse. "Lead him there, he will easily fall back into the cornucopia's level and burn to death!" 

Rainier suddenly changed direction. "I'll do it! I'm the fastest!" "Be careful! Its still hot!" I warn. 

But Rainier already reached there. "Hey! Over here!" He yells out and the bear changes it's direction, both Clarisse and I stop dead in our tracks. 

Rainier skips through the glass floor circle in four quick steps, avoiding stepping in the melting parts- I have no idea he was so agile- the bear immediately follows, only he isn't as graceful or agile as Rainier and my idea works, the bear falls off into the burning cornucopia bellow us with what's left of the glass floor. Now only a little sharp edges remained. 

We all took a minute to catch our breath before Clarisse charged at me with full speed. Ready to drive her spear through my heart. 

I managed to duck below it and slash at her with my remaining knife- lost my sais five days ago when I left them before I headed to kill Leslie- I'm pretty sure I hit her, because the knife was red with blood, but if it had any effect on her, Clarisse didn't show it. 

She knees me in the face, knocking me down as she tried to do the same thing she tried over Two weeks ago and stab it through my gut, but I roll out of her attack's way. 

_Where's Rainier?_

Clarisse suddenly screams in pain and turns around to knock Rainier down with her good leg. She holds her foot on his neck, stopping him from breathing. "You should've died _yesterday"_ She raised her spear, ready to drive it through him when I pull her back down. 

She probably saw it coming, because she rolls me closer to the shattered glass floor. She stands up, barely, and pushes her foot down the way she did to Rainier a few seconds ago, the air slipping away from me, my lungs were on fire, I could barely see Clarisse raising her spear again..

Someome- Rainier- tackled her down to through the where the glass floor was a few minutes ago. 

"NO!" I scream and crawl to the edge fast enough to catch Rainier's hand- the one attached to his wounded shoulder. 

Something is resisting me, pulling Rainier down, and my hand with it. Clarisse; she's not giving up just yet. "If I'm going down, you both go down with me!" I hear her yell out from bellow. 

I grab Rainier's arm with both my hands, his face twist in pain. "Jean, please let me go, it's over. You can win!" 

"No; I can't leave you, not like that!" I yell out, tears starting to burst. 

Clarisse's pull causes me to hold both my hands against one of the edges, that cuts into my wrists and palms. "No, I'm not letting you sacrifice yourself for me!" 

He strangles to hold on, the blood from my new wound, mixed with the blood from his reopened injury made his arm and my palm wet and slippery. "Jean, you were in it to win it from the start! For your dad; for the rest of the legacies, for your friend.. you can let me go and get it all over with; Please. She's gonna pull all of us with her!" 

"But you... you wanted to win for your brother, for your mom- she Can't lose you too!" 

"Tell her how much I love her. Take care of her for me!" Rainier is pulled further down by Clarisse and the shard of glass I lied on continues to cut through my arm. 

"I will. I love you, Rainier! I'm sorry!" I cry out. 

"It's okay. Love you too, Jean" he whispers. 

I let him go and watch as he and Clarisse drop down into the flames that closed on the cornucopia's level.

I cover my ears so I won't hear them scream in agony. Instead I hear two canons. At least it was quick. 

I pull myself up shakingly. The silence that followed the canons was heavy and eerie and it made me wanna curl into a ball, but it was also when it dawned on me:

I am the last one standing. 

The trumpets sound seconds later. "Ladies and gentlemen, the victor of the One hundred and tenth annual hunger games, Jean Trojillio!" 

Nothing happened. I looked up, confused onto how the hovercraft is gonna come pick me up. "Please lie down where you stand and protect your head" a robotic voice echoed throughout the arena. 

I do as I am told, that's when I hear the huge explosion that knocked down rocks and dust down. I stayed on the floor; covering my ears with my hands above my head. 

That's when I hear the soft humming of the hovercraft's engine, and when I stand up to grab the floating ladder, I hasitate.

For the first time in a little over a month, I feel the afternoon sun on my face.

* * *

I don't know how much time I spent on the medical check up station.. 

They checked my breathing and neck was okay, they disinfected and rebandaged old wounds, like the one in my back, and stitched up the long new cuts in my arms. 

"We'll give her a day to rest up and for the stitches to melt into her skin. Then they can organize their party" says one of the doctors.

_Well it's nice that you talk about me as if I'm not here._

"Will it leave a scar?" I look down at my new stitched up wounds. Closing and opening my palms to see if they still work. 

"Probably, on your hands. The cuts from the shards were pretty deep, that can't be hidden well with the creams the stylists have. All the rest? Will fade with time" the doctor that spoke earlier finally looks at me. 

When they give me clearance to leave the infirmary part; we already reach the landing zone and my heart starts beating faster:

_I'm gonna see dad and Kala, I'm gonna see my dad again!_

"We have avoxes back in your compound to help you shower and clean up better, Trojillio" ordered the firm head female doctor when she leads me off the hovercraft. 

I don't listen, I fanatically scan the huge landing zone, looking for anyone familiar.

"Jeanie!" I hear someone call my name. To my right, stood a building where ground crew for the hovercraft came and went, and someone else stepped out of there too.

Dad. 

"Dad.." I can't stop myself from running in his direction as we crushed into eachother in a big hug. He wraps his hands around me and pulls me close so I can smell his familiar scent from _Home._

We stay like that as the sun continued to set. No words needed.

* * *

"Where exactly is my token supposed to go?" I check myself in the huge body length mirror in the remake center. 

The necklace I'm wearing fits almost like a collar; with gems in various colors. I like the dress, but the necklace is a bit much. 

"Right above your heart; darling!" Clymene has to stand on a stool to put my necklace over my head, it's modified so that my mother's ring hangs lower than it did before; reaching my chest. 

"Now. Are you ready for your recap interview amd your crowning?" She claps in excitement. 

I exhale slowly. "I think I am".

A bold lie. 

My dad and Kala look fantastic in their dark blue suit and green velvet dress. I can't help but send a dumb smile at my dad. "You look beautiful, Jeanie" 

"Thank you, dad" 

I fidget with my long sleeves as Yelene Ackerman does her thing where she introduces our team: first Giorno, then Clymene, when she calls my dad- who was my offical mentor since Kala took Rainier- he sends me a reassuring smile.

"And now, the one you all waited for: your victor for the record breaking 110th games: Jean Trojillio!" 

I take it as my que to enter, luckily, Clymene didn't put me in heels because my knees were shaking badly. 

Elenia Snow walked on the stage with the golden crown in her study hands. I never got to look at our president from this closely, and she looked almost ageless. I bow my head so she can place the crown and I don't dare to meet her eyes. 

Dad said once she has the same snake like eyes as her grandfather. 

I sit on the golden victor throne, the metal sent a shiver down my spine. 

I answer Yelene's questions, I watch the reaping bravely, daring to look away when I killed Leslie, when I let Rainier fall.

"Do you have anyone you wanna thank?" Yelene leans her chin in her palm. 

I look over to where my father sits, this morning he told me how many victors helped him take care of me in that long months, I wanted to name them all. 

"Of course, I'd like to thank my dad, who taught me everything I know. And to the generous sponsers who brought me here and kept me alive, thank you from the bottom of my heart". _they like this kind of kissing up to them._ "Recently, my dad told me about all the victors who helped him and Kala take care of me and Rainier, and I'd love to thank them too"

I locate each one of them before I say their name. "I am more than grateful to be here and have you celebrate in my honor."

After this, I was free to enjoy the party.

When I spotted Alexa Elle Sheridan with Matthew Mellark near the wine table, every instinct in my body screamed _avoid at all costs!._ Instead, we locked eyes and she moved towards me. 

"That's a perfect Victory outfit. You look damn fierce in it" she comments, and I can't help but see Ophelia in every move she does: in the way she holds her wine glass, the way her blonde curls flow down her back, the way her blue eyes study me carefully.

"I'm- I'm sorry about your sister" I mutter. 

"I'm the one who should be sorry. She left you to die, after all" Alexa Elle's eyes are much more hard to read than her sister's. "We can call it even, can we?" She asks, lifting her hand to shake. 

I take her hand and shake it, hesitantly. "We can call it even. 

The second victor in a chain of victors I didn't wanna meet was Medea Vaughn; and she was the one to find me. "You did it. Fucked or not" she chuckled. 

"Yeah. I did" 

Medea's smile faded. "Look. I get you are still pretty mad about what I did back in my games, and I would like to make it up to you.. maybe with a drink or something-"

"It's okay." I cut her. "I long since learned to not blame you. I'd love to take that drink offer. At my victory ball, after I'll turn 18" 

Medea's face light up. "Wonderful! Care to hug it out?" She opened her arms. 

I hug her, confused. "Listen, Back in day 20, when you talked to Tate.." she whispers. "I heard it. I was substituting for your dad. What you said about your dreams. I just want you to know you have my attention. I'd like to bring an end to this oppressive tradition too" 

I freeze, Medea breaks away from me. _are you serious?_ I mouth. 

_Dead serious._ She mouths back. _we can talk about it again when you come to Four. For now, try to rest ip._

"You know what, Medea-" I say out loud. "-How about you act on your drink offer now? I could use some new victor friends"

* * *

I watch as the train screeches into a halt, the familiar view of the train station back home fills me with excitement and nervousness. 

The people of Eleven all wait for me on the dock. Little kids standing in front of their parents with flowers to give me. I take every single one. 

So many people stop to thank me for the allowance, the allowance that will save lives this winter. 

I can already feel the not so hot sun of late August, it's hard to believe I was gone for six weeks. That summer is already coming to an end. 

I spot my dad standing with a woman I recognize as Mrs Herya- Rainier's mother. 

Every compliment I got, every thanks, they all burn down by my shame. _In what right you stand here alive, and this woman- who already lost one son to the games- will never get her son back._

It's only when Mrs Herya wraps her hands around my dad's waist, holding a piece of paper, that I dare to come any closer. 

"Mrs Herya, I am so, so sorry I couldn't save your son's life" 

"It's okay, darling. I could do with you. A wonderful second choice" she strokes my cheek. "And I would love to take on your offer, James. Maybe being alone is not good for me" 

"I invited Brianne to come live with me in the victors village, you can, of course, live in your own house-" 

"I'm staying with you" I cross my arms. "And I definitely don't mind Mrs Herya living with us, it's the least I can do to atone for Rainier" I smile. 

"Wonderful, how about we go home now?" Suggests my father. "Before the party for you" 

We start walking north, Me, dad, Kala and Mrs Herya, through the view I am so used to seeing, that still looks the same even after every thing I went through. The old metal gate creeks when we walk through it, and I would not want it any other way.

I am finally, after so long, back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final 9: placements:
> 
> 9th place- Ophelia Sheridan (D1, 2 kills)  
> 8th place- Ethan Nolan (D6, 0 kills)  
> 7th place- Tate Haybrook (D4, 0 kills)  
> 6th place- Cory Woosley (D8, 1 kill)  
> 5th place- Leslie Parker (D8, 1 kill)  
> 4th place- Angus Graint (D9, 3 kills)  
> 3rd place- Clarisse St Mark (D2, 5 kills), Rainier Herya (D11, 0 kills)
> 
> Victor: Jean Trojillio, district 11, 3 technical kills total.


	32. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean visits Hailey and Rainier's graves before her victory tour. She remembers Hailey's funeral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little epilogue to reach 50k

_The mid summer's sun shone brightly over the fresh grave and the mourners around it. I put my hand over my face to hide the sun from my eyes._

_Hailey looks so peaceful in her open casket, as if she's sleeping in a very narrow bed. The Summit family dressed her in her best dress- the one I got her for her 15th birthday._ _she always insisted not to wear it during the reaping because she thought an event like the reaping is not worthy of wearing it._

_Just a shame the event she ended up wearing it for was her own funeral._

_"Would anyone like to say a few words?" One of the white merchants of the district was in charge of the ceremony, he is in charge of every funeral in Eleven, even my mom's, and Chaff's too._

_Hailey's mother weeps in her husband's arms. I note the peacekeepers standing in a safe distance from us, arms crossed, waiting to intervene._

_I don't wanna say anything. I'm afraid if I start talking, I'll just end up sobbing on the floor. Instead I bury my face in dad's chest. He slowly strokes my hair and I know he is more than used to funerals like this, he's been attending them since before I was Even born._

_I clutch my ring- got it back last week when dad and Kala arrived with the two bodies._

_This is all my fault._

* * *

**Winter 110 ADD**

**Jean**

"This is all my fault" I whisper to the single grave in the two land spots meant for the tributes of the 110th games. 

**Rainier Herya**

**93 ADD- 110 ADD**

**Beloved son, friend and brother**

**Fly high, reunited with your love at last.**

The last sentence isn't a lie, the only good thing that came out of me winning is that Rainier got to reunite with Tate whereever souls reach when they die. 

"Despite what you think, I know you would do a better job with the tour than me. I have a feeling I would mess up or start crying in the middle of my speech in district 4. Besides, you had no kills, you could've stand in district 8 knowing your hands are clean of blood. What am I going to do, I have no idea" 

The only thing that replies to me are the birds singing in their trees. 

I leave the flowers I got for him on the cold marble headstone. "Just so you know.. your mother came to live with us, and I think she's happy.. with my dad. He makes her happy.. and she makes him happy." My eyes sting as I try to hold in my tears. "And it makes me happy that my dad found someone to love again" 

I clutch my necklace. It's officially mine, dad said he wanted me to have a lasting memory of mother, and that he knows mother would be glad to see him finally moving on. If he'll ever decide to marry Mrs Herya- Brianne- he'll buy her a new ring to have. 

"Thank you; for saving my life so many times out there. I couldn't have done this without you. And I'm sorry I wasn't at your funeral. It was too hard with all the nightmares and the pills" I wipe my tears. 

I walk three lines to the right, where Hailey's grave still stands.

"Hey" I leave the second boqauet of flowers on her headstone. "I know you're probably mad at me for forgiving Medea, but she's not the problem, I realise that now. The Capitol is the problem, they are the ones to blame for your death. And trust me, I'm working on that. And even if it takes me years, I'll figure out how to avenge you, and every single boy and girl in this field" 

I take a quick peek at my watch, it's 10 A.M. meaning Clymene and the prep team are gonna be here in half an hour, I gotta go get ready. 

I still have little time, if I'll run back to the village. 

I take out the silver flute from it's case. "You both are gonna laugh at me, but I wanted to choose a skill that reminds me of my dad, since that was his chosen skill, I chose the flute as well and asked him to teach me. But I've been getting good, I promise!" 

I hold the flute up to my mouth and play a song, an old lullaby no one knows where it came from. Maybe from the age before Panem. It's the first song in my repertoire of six peices. A mini concerto, dad called it. 

The second song is jumpy and upbeat, the band usually plays it during the annual end of summer festival to celebrate the harvest of the summer fruit and the start of a new year. It's the only time peacekeepers leave us be and let us celebrate, the nicer ones- the ones who don't answer to Teerence- join in. 

The third song is a classic, an ancient melody for a love song an old king wrote for his lover. "Greensleeves" 

The fourth and fifth songs are to be preformed with a band behind me, for the richer districts like 4 this is not a problem, so these distracts are where I'll preform them. Aside from the Capitol, of course. 

The last song is meant to be a duet, I save it for the Capitol and for our district only: it's the only song I'll preform with my father, and since our bond together was what drew the Capitol to me so much, we decided we'll play for them. 

If you ask me, it's gonna make their weak, stupid hearts cry like little babies. Assuming they have hearts; to send a bunch of kids to die every year. 

I set down the flute, clean it and put it down back in the case. "I hope you liked it" I give their graves one last glance before I have to run back to the village as fast as I can.

I have an agonizing tour to go through. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NAILED IT. 50K HOLY FUCKKKKK


End file.
